Даниэла Стил - All That Glitters

Coco stayed home with the baby for two weeks, and then brought Bethanie to visit in the office. She had arranged for someone to come to the house and stay with the baby as soon as she went back to work.

Leslie startled her with a proposition then. She needed some funding to help the business grow and to hire more assistants, and she loved working with Coco. She asked if she wanted to become a partner and invest in the business and Coco loved the idea. They talked about it again on the phone that night, when the baby was sleeping. She loved the prospect of being part owner of the business, and she and Leslie worked well together.

When Coco went to sleep that night, she had a new business, and a new daughter. It seemed like a lot. She felt blessed alone in her big house. She looked down at Bethanie sound asleep in her basket, checked on her one last time, and knew that all was well in her world. She hadn’t thought of Nigel the whole time she had given birth to her. He didn’t exist for her anymore, and never would for Bethanie. Coco knew that would be enough for both of them. She smiled as she looked at Bethanie in her basket, and for the first time, realized how much her parents had loved her. As much as the heavens had stars. It was the one gift Nigel had given her that mattered, and for an instant she was grateful to him and then resolutely put him out of her mind forever. He had served a purpose in her life after all.

Chapter 14

Ian surfaced in October, four months after he had disappeared, and returned pleased with the first draft of his new book, and delighted to see Coco again.

She showed him her creation too. Bethanie sound asleep in her crib, eight weeks old.

“She’s very pretty,” he said, fascinated by her. “She looks like you.”

“And like my mother too.” She wasn’t imagining it. Sam had even seen it on FaceTime.

Coco was back at the office full-time again by then, and an equal partner in the business. She had a nanny for Bethanie in the daytime and took care of her herself at night. She loved the time she spent with her.

They had the funding they needed now to advertise their business and hire more people. They were talking about moving to a bigger space than Leslie’s dining room.

Ian told her all about his book when he took her out to dinner. She got the nanny to stay late.

“I missed you,” he said, with a look of surprise.

“I missed you too.”

“How was it having the baby? Did it go okay? I was worried about you.” But not enough so to call her, which went against the grain with him, and would have implied commitment, which he didn’t want.

“It was scary and hard and gorgeous at the end. It hurts a lot, worse than I thought it would.”

“You’ll know for next time.” He smiled at her.

“I don’t want a next time unless I do it right with the right person. I don’t think you’re meant to go through stuff like this alone,” she said pensively. The whole experience had impressed her, and she was grateful that he was back. He admitted that he liked the house so much that he had been in London the whole time, but he still hadn’t called her. It was who he was and nothing was ever going to change him. She knew that.

“Maybe you’re not supposed to do it alone, but you did it, Coco, and it looks like you did a great job.”

They started seeing each other as much as they had before. He stayed at her house now, since she had to be there for the baby. He wasn’t around for her at important times, but he had an easy way of sliding into her life that worked for them both. He filled an empty space in her world, and fit right into it like the missing piece in a puzzle. She didn’t expect more of him than he was able to offer. She had no idea how long it would last, or when he’d disappear again, but for now, it was all she needed and had room for in her life too. His dog, Bruce, slept in the kitchen at night, and was happy to see them in the morning.

—

A month after Ian came back, Sam called her in the middle of the night for her. He was sobbing and at first she couldn’t understand him. His father had died during dinner of a heart attack. His mother was devastated, as were his siblings. No one had expected it and they were all turning to him. And he was heartbroken too. Now everything rested on his shoulders. The business, the family, his wife, a baby soon. It was overwhelming.

They talked until he calmed down, and she told him she would take the first plane out the next day. She had to bring the baby with her. She was only three months old, and Coco had gotten a passport for her, just a few weeks before, in case they ever went to New York.

“Are you really coming?” he asked, touched by the gesture. He had always been there for her too.

“Of course I’m coming. You were there for me when my parents died, weren’t you?” He had stayed with her for months, and visited her every day after that.

“We’ll be sitting shiva for the next week,” he explained.

“That’s when people come to visit, isn’t it?”

“And pray.”

“Will your mom let me come to that?”

“I’m the head of the family now. I make the rules,” he said somberly. He was so young. They both were, and had to take the reins so early. She knew how much his family expected of him, somehow it didn’t seem fair.

“I’ll text you when I know when I’m arriving. I’ll call you when I get to the apartment.” She called the housekeeper then, since it was dinnertime in New York. Theresa still maintained her parents’ apartment. Coco asked her if she would babysit for Bethanie for her, and Theresa was thrilled. She couldn’t wait to see them both. Coco had sent her a photo of the baby when she was born.

Ian had spent the night with her, but she didn’t go back to bed after Sam’s call. Instead, she packed quietly in her dressing room. She took several black dresses, and a nice one for the funeral, and she packed for the baby too. She called the airline, and there was a flight to New York at noon. She had to be at the airport to check in at ten, and leave her house at nine.

She slipped back into bed with Ian then, and he woke up at five, as he always did to go to the gym. She told him she was leaving for New York that morning. She told him about Sam’s father. “I’ll be back in a few days.”

“I’ll be here, waiting for you.” He smiled at her, and pulled her into his arms before they got up. “I’m sorry you have to do that.” He knew it would be painful for her and bring back hard memories.

“He’s always been there for me. I can’t miss it. And Sam’s going to have so much responsibility on his shoulders now.”

“Just like you,” he said sympathetically, and then they got out of bed, and she went to make him the tea he liked. She kept a stock of it at her house for whenever he spent the night.

“You’re a good friend,” he said, as she poured coffee for herself. The baby was still asleep. She had just stopped nursing her. She and Ian were at ease with each other, as they sat at the kitchen table, waking up.

Ian kissed her when he left, and she heard him drive away on his motorcycle, slow enough for Bruce to follow him the short distance to his house. It was going to be a sad few days for her in New York. Then Bethanie started to cry, and she had to feed her and dress both of them, in time to leave for the airport. She was juggling the diaper bag, her purse, the baby, a stroller, a car seat, and a suitcase when she got in the cab. It was the first time she had traveled with Bethanie. She felt like an octopus trying to keep track of it all.

She managed to keep the baby entertained before they boarded the flight, and they both slept for half the trip. Then the baby cried for a while, and Coco apologized to the passengers around her. She got a porter at JFK, and managed to get through customs with the baby, the stroller, and all their bags, got a cab, and headed to her parents’ apartment in the city. She hadn’t been there in two and a half years. She had gotten married and divorced and had become a mother since she’d left. So much had changed in her life. And now Sam’s was about to change too.