Henry Green - Loving

'Don't stop,' she sobbed into his ear.

'Why,' he said, 'I love you more than I thought I was capable. I'm surprised at myself, honest I am. If my old mother could see her Charley now she'd never recognize 'im,' he murmured.

She at once got off his knees. She started blowing her nose and cleaning up. He leant forward, gazed awkward into her face. 'I never seen anything like your eyes they're so 'uge not in all my experience,' he announced soft. 'Yet for eighteen months I didn't so much as notice them. Can you explain that?' Then, perhaps to distract her attention, he invited her to witness what he saw, the peacocks that had been attracted. For these most greedy of all birds had collected in twos about and behind the lilac trees, on the scrounge for tit-bits.

'Oh those,' she answered. 'It's wicked the way they spy on you.'

'They've been raised in a good school,' he remarked.

'There,' she said giving her face a last dab. She did not look at him. 'I'm sorry I did that. Well then Charley what's next?'

'You mustn't blame this on my old lady ducks,' he replied. 'She gets pig'eaded at times the way all old people do. But that's not to say she hasn't wounded me because she has and where a man feels it most, right in my pride in myself,' he explained. 'She knows I'm barely an age for this war, yet awhiles anyhow, yet she seems to think I'm not in it all I might be, d'you get me?' Edith stayed silent.

'Oh this pain,' he suddenly groaned. 'It will nag a man.'

'I got some bicarbonate indoors will soon see to that,' she said.

'I was wonderin' if you could just nip over and fetch us some,' he suggested green in the face.

'We haven't finished,' she answered grim. There's a lot I want to get straight first.'

'What's that love?' he asked.

'What are we goin' to do then?' Edith continued. She spoke calm.

Raunce leant forward. In an effort to pull himself together perhaps, he squinted terribly.

'We got to get out of here,' he said.

'Leave this place?' she asked.

'There's nothing else for it sweetheart,' he replied.

'And go to the Agency in Dublin to find us another Charley?'

'No dear. We've just been in to all that. We'd best clear right out.'

'What and go to America somewhere Charley?'

'Not on your life,' he answered. 'It's back to the old country for you an' me my love.'

'And have me took up as I step from off the ship which brought us across by one of those women police waiting on the dockside to put me in the A. T. S.? 'Ave you gone out of your mind then?'

'Steady on Edie where did you get that from? They don't act in such a fashion, not yet they don't.'

'Out of your very lips and not so long since either. You sat at dinner and frightened my Kate out of her mind almost, so she shouldn't go.'

'Why it was only a tale,' he pleaded.

'How d'you know? You said so Charley.'

'You've got no diplomacy love, that's what's the matter. I didn't want you left with all her work or some dirty Irish judy brought in to help who you'd have to go round after all the time. Sure I pitched 'er a tale. Mind you they'll be forced to it in the end before this war's over, when the casualties start an' they get real short of labour. You mark my words we'll all be in uniform then. But just at present there's nothing of the sort I tell you.'

'And you're certain this ain't just your idea to get rid of me?' she asked tearfully once more.

He put an arm round her shoulders.

'Ere,' he said, 'what's up all of a sudden? It's not like you to have nightmares or see shadows followin' you round.'

'I'm that bewildered,' she explained again, settling her cheek against his.

'Now don't you fret,' he comforted. 'You leave all the brain work to your old man. Lucky Charley they call him,' he said in a threadbare return to his usual manner. 'We want to get out of this country and when once we've made up our minds we want to get out fast.'

'Elope?' she cried delighted all of a sudden. 'Elope,' he agreed grave.

She gave him a big kiss. 'Why Charley,' she said, seemingly more and more delighted, 'that's romantic.'

'It's what we're going to do whatever the name you give it,' he replied.

'But don't you see that's a wonderful thing to do,' she went on. 'Maybe so,' he said soft into her ear, 'but it's what we're doing.'

'Oh I can love you for this,' she murmured. 'There I've said it now haven't I? You were always on at me to say. But go on.'

'That's all,' he announced. 'Only once I get hold of Michael we'd best get away out to-morrow.'

'Wait a minute,' she cried in a disappointed voice. 'And how about our month's notice?'

'We shan't hand it in mate that's all. We'll flit.'

'Oh but Charley that would be wrong,' she said in a low voice. 'Right or wrong it's what we'll do. We could get Kate to come along if you was to feel awkward.'

'Awkward?' she asked. 'How d'you mean?'

'Well,' he replied shyly. 'We can't get married before we've put the banns up a full three weeks on the other side. I was just askin' myself if you'd feel it was right our travelling without we were man and wife.'

She laughed. 'D'you reckon I can't protect myself from you after all this time?' she enquired gentle.

'I know you can right enough,' he replied, 'but I couldn't tell the way you'd see it.' She did not answer this. She said, 'Kate would never come with us, not now.'

'How's that Edie?'

'On account of her Paddy.'

'Go on with that for a tale.'

'I thought you knew dear,' she said.

'Well I did in a manner of speaking but not to place any reliance on it.'

'It's true right enough. She says he needs 'er.'

'Then all I can say is that's disgusting, downright disgusting.'

'Dithtrething and dithtathteful?' she asked.

'No mate it's no joking matter. Why a big, grown girl like her an' that ape out of a Zoo.'

'There's the way things are Charley.'

'But how did this come about?'

'She was lonely,' Edith explained, 'an' she watched us.'

'Ere,' he said, 'don't go layin' Paddy at my door. Why it's unnatural.'

'Well she's made her bed an' she needs must lie on it.'

'All the more reason then for us to get quick out of here,' was his comment.

'And not say goodbye to a soul?' she now asked in an excited voice.

'Not to anyone,' he replied narrowly watching her.

'Oh I couldn't,' she cried as though all at once she had despaired. 'I must tell Miss Evelyn and Miss Moira.'

'That's been the cause of half the trouble in this place. Once they get hold of something it's taken right out of control.'

'But it wouldn't be right. Why they're innocent.'

'Ow d'you mean innocent?' he enquired. There's a lot we could lay to their door.'

'They're not grown up,' she explained. They've got their lives to live yet. They mightn't understand if I was to go off without a word.'

'They'll forget soon enough dearest,' he said.

'No Charley,' she insisted and appeared distressed, 'you don't know. It would be wicked that's all. D'you mean to say we've not got to say one word?'

'That's right mate.'

'But what about Miss Burch? How will she take it? Can you tell me? Or Miss Swift who's trusted me with the young ladies?'

He put his arms about her. He held her close.

'Look my own love,' he said, 'it's like this. Once we let it get about that we're goin' then they'll all of them begin to talk. Mrs Tennant will pay a call on Mrs Welch who will send for old Agatha out of her bed. Miss Swift'11 'ave 'ysterics an' the Captain will receive a phone call from Mrs Jack to stop you an' me on the boat. Michael will be threatened with the sack. They'll even tell the garage in Kinalty they mustn't hire to us.' He could feel her trembling.

'But Charley dear,' she protested, 'this is a free country surely to goodness?'