Gao Xingjian - One Man

In the middle of the night, he rode his bicycle to the post and telecommunications building in Xidan. There was a telephone number printed on the county hostel letterhead, and he asked to make an urgent telephone call. An unfriendly woman's voice speaking in a drawl asked for the name of the person he wanted. He explained that he was making a long-distance call from Beijing and that he wanted to speak to Xu Qian, the university student waiting to be assigned work. He was put on hold. The receiver buzzed for a long time before an equally unfriendly voice asked, "Who is it?" He repeated the name of the person he wanted to talk to, and the other party said, "That's me." He couldn't recognize her voice, because that night they spent together, neither dared speak aloud. Hearing this unfamiliar voice, he didn't know how to respond. The receiver kept giving a hollow buzz, and he mumbled, "It's good to know you're alive." Qian said, "You gave me a terrible fright! I'm in shock from being woken in the middle of the night!" He wanted to say that he loved her, that she must go on living no matter what, but he found it impossible to say all the things he had thought up while he was cycling. The switchboard operator in this small county town would certainly be listening to the urgent long-distance call from Beijing so late at night. The telephone was still making a hollow buzz, and he told her he'd received her letter. The telephone was buzzing again, and he didn't know what to say. She said coldly, "If you have to, phone during the day." He said, "I'm sorry, go back to bed." She hung up.

A young woman is lying on top of you. You're in bed, not fully awake. She's giggling and the two of you are messing around. You're really enjoying yourself and hope you are not dreaming. You're squashed under her, and, down her open collar, you touch her smooth skin, feel her firm breasts. She doesn't resist, and goes on having fun with you. You're delighted by this unexpected encounter, but can't say her name. You vaguely know it, but are afraid of getting it wrong. You sift through your memories. In such-and-such a situation, there was this girl, you often saw her on your travels but were never able to get close to her. She is now pressing against you and you say you didn't think you would meet her like this. You're really so very happy! She says that she is here just to see you. On her way through the city, she heard that you were here for a conference, so she came to see you. You say don't leave! She says of course not, but she does have to fix up her luggage and go through registration procedures. You don't immediately make love with her, thinking to yourself there will be plenty of time, she has come from far away specially to see you, so it's not likely that she will leave right away. You get out of bed and ask where her luggage is. She says over there, in the adjoining room. You turn and see that the two rooms indeed adjoin, in fact there is nothing separating them, and, moreover, the other room has two beds in it. You're worried someone else will take the room, so you say you will have to quickly get a hotel attendant to get you a double room. But it happens to be the lunch break, so you go to the dining room together to have something to eat. She follows closely, snuggles against you, and says it was very hard, finding you. You keep trying to remember her name, steal glances at her familiar face, but you can't be sure. She's more like a woman than a young girl, an older teenager or a young woman, so there shouldn't be any problem making love with her. Moreover, she has come to see you. She says shouldn't you first introduce her to the person in charge of the conference? You say you are now a free man and can stay with anyone you want to. You don't have to get anyone's approval, and you take her with you to the service desk of the hotel to change to a double room. The man behind the desk hands you a key and a slip of paper. There's a number on the key tag, and you ask where the room is. The man says he is only in charge of registration, and, to find that out, you would have to phone up, the phone number is on the slip of paper. You ask if you can use the phone on his desk, and he says you will need coins. You can't find any coins in your pocket, and talk to the man again. Is it all right to call first and pay later? He doesn't say either yes or no, so you make a call and are told that the room is on the third floor. You get in the elevator, and it takes you to the top floor, and you come out onto a parking lot. The two of you get back into the elevator, go down, but still can't find the room. You stop a maid with a trolley, who is cleaning rooms, and she tells you to go down one floor. The two of you finally arrive on the ground floor and find an elegant dining room, so you think you may as well eat first. The maître d' in a tie politely apologizes and says reservations are needed, and that they are fully booked. You tell him you are taking part in the conference, and he says special arrangements have been made for conference participants in another dining room. You and she get into the elevator again, to look for the room. You scrutinize the number on the key and find something odd about it. The number is 11 GY, and you've found rooms with numbers 14, 15, and 16, but there isn't a number 11. You ask the fat woman sitting on a high stool at the bar by the passageway, thinking she is a hotel guest and will know about the number. The swivel stool spins around as the woman points behind you, saying, right there, it's that hole! You don't understand why it's a hole. Written on the brass plate on the doorframe is number 11 G, the second letter isn't clear but it could be Y. You part the glass-bead curtain, and inside is a huge row of joined mattresses. You look around the big room. Above, to the right of the joined mattresses, there is yet another layer of bedding, which stretches inside the wall. Access is only by crawling in, but the four double mattresses all have pillows. You think that if you want to make love with her, you will put her luggage in the farthest corner. You come out of the room and think to yourself that somehow you will have to find another room. However, she says she is traveling with another woman and they have to stay together. Luckily, they know people in the city and will be able to find somewhere to stay. But, you say, as she has come to see you… She says next time, there will be opportunities. She turns to leave, and you wake up, full of regret. You try to recall the memory, to clutch at some clues, so that you will know how you came to have this dream. You discover you are in a single bed in a small room, and there is a bird chirping outside the window.

For a while, you can't remember how you came to be sleeping here, your head is throbbing, and you aren't fully awake. Last night, you drank too much. You haven't drunk to excess like this for a long time. You drank scotch, five-grain liquor, and red wine, then, to quench your thirst, also beer. A full case of beer had been opened, but some cans are still left. Someone brought the scotch from England, and the five-grain liquor was from China. You remember now: a group of Chinese writers and poets have come for a conference here, in the southern outskirts of Stockholm, at the international center named after the assassinated Swedish president Olaf Palme.

You open your eyes and sit up. Outside the window is the lake with clouds hanging low over it. Lush shrubs and trees grow on the flat stretches of parkland, and there is only the singing of birds, no one is around, and it's very peaceful.

You recall the fragrant warmth of the woman in the dream and can't help feeling disappointed. Why did you have such a dream? It must have been because last night everyone was talking about China again, and you had a lot to drink. China always gives you a headache. But that is the purpose of the conference, to discuss contemporary Chinese literature. The Swedes had sponsored the visit of a group of Chinese writers from China and elsewhere, providing the plane tickets, and food and accommodation for a few days. This was an ideal place for a vacation. There was plenty of beer, but because liquor was heavily taxed, the conference participants brought it along with them. There was heavy drinking until dawn. In July, it was summer, and it was a white night; the sky did not become dark, and at midnight it was like dawn. The other side of the lake was a continuous hazy forest with a streak of bright-red dawn above, the birds and insects were sleeping, but these old friends went on talking loudly on the wooden jetty next to the lakeside sauna hut. They engaged in lofty discussions, and their voices resonated into the distance. Ripples stirred on the mirror-smooth surface, spreading in circles to the middle of the lake and making the weeds and the reflections tremble. And this was not a dream.