Fannie Flagg - Standing in the Rainbow

At the Rexall, Bertha Ann looked to see where Doc was and reached behind her and turned the radio down. "Well… Father's Day is here again… and if you are anything like me, every year I wrack my brain trying to figure out just what to get Doc. Men… aren't they just the hardest creatures in the world to buy for? But this year I think I have come up with a good one that you might want to think about yourself You know how Doc loves his tools, so this year we are giving him a gift certificate to Warren's Hardware store so he can go pick out exactly what he wants. Just call Macky and he said he would be happy to make you out one for any amount."

After her guest had sung, Dorothy came back on. "Thank you, Virginia Mae. I'm sure all you single gals out there enjoyed that one. And now without further ado, on to our winning letter. Mrs. Joni Hartman of Bible Grove, Missouri, writes:

"Dear Neighbor Dorothy,

"We have a lot of squirrels here in Bible Grove and they are always dropping acorns out of the trees. One day I was watching as a stranger walked past my house when a squirrel dropped a large acorn out of the tree and hit her on the head. She fell down thinking somebody shot her. I went out and told her she had been hit in the head by an acorn.

I invited her in and gave her an aspirin and found out she worked for the Internal Revenue Servicethat was the reason she thought somebody had shot her. She quit her job right after that and now has a good job working in the dead-letter department in Washington, D.C." and we correspond regularly.

"Congratulations, Mrs. Hartman. When you hear about things like that… it just does your heart good. One day a squirrel drops an acorn and the next thing you know you have a new friend, not to mention a free five-pound bag of Golden Flake Flour.

"We just never know what to expect next in life, do we?"

Betty Raye did not know it, but she had not become friends with Vita Green a moment too soon. She would need a good friend and all the strength and courage she had for what was about to happen next.

Earl Finley had quietly done his dirty work behind closed doors, made the right deals and promises to the right people of both parties. He waited, coiled like a snake, until what he deemed a respectable amount of time had passed and then struck swiftly. Almost overnight, it seemed, a motion for a recall was put before the Missouri house and senate, stating that since Betty Raye had been elected with the expectation and understanding that her husband would run the state, that expectation was no longer valid. Within twenty-four hours, the motion was passed declaring that Betty Raye's governorship was null and void and a new election was to take place to determine who would serve out her last two years in office.

And Carnie Boofer, who had been sitting in the wings waiting, was poised and ready to go. It was all done with the best of intentions, so everyone or almost everyone said The motion had been passed to relieve a nice lady from an impossible situation so she could leave office and step down gracefully and with dignity. Betty Raye received a lovely letter from the Speaker of the House, thanking her for her valiant service for the past two years and stating that although she was no longer the legal governor, as a courtesy she and the boys would be allowed to re main living at the mansion until the election was over. They had even voted to allot her a lifetime pension of $10,000 a year.

Vita thought it was a lousy trick they had pulled but agreed that in the long run it was probably for the best. She did not tell Betty Raye this, but knowing Earl Finley as well as she did and how dangerous he could be, she understood his methods all too well. If he wanted someone out of office he would stop at nothing to see that it happened.

Vita still had her suspicions about his involvement in Hamm's disappearance but so far all Jake Spurling and his men had come up with was that Finley and all his cohorts had an airtight alibi that weekend but then, they always did. It never occurred to anyone, not even Betty Raye, that she would not step down.

At first, after the surprise of the thing, there was a part of her that was actually relieved. Now she could leave before she might make some terrible mistake and disgrace herself and undo all of Hamm's good work.

Now, finally, she could move into her own house. It was all furnished. She was almost beginning to feel grateful to them.

But a few days after she and Alberta Peets started packing up and getting ready to move, something slowly began to dawn on her. In essence, despite all the niceties, what had really taken place was that the state politicians, led by Earl Finley, had said, "Here's your hat, what's your hurry, and don't let the door hit you on your way out." She called Vita in Kansas City.

"Vita, I've been thinking. We don't know for sure who was responsible for getting rid of Hamm but if it was any of the same people who are trying to get rid of me, I don't think they should be able to get away with it. Do you? Not without a fight, at least for Hamm's sake, if nothing else."

Vita sat up and paid attention. "What can you do? "

"Well, if they say the last election was null and void, I'll run again, on my own."

"Do you know what you are up against?" Vita said.

"No, I don't."

"Well, I do. I know these people and they play rough."

"Vita, what more can they do other than kill me? I know I probably won't win. But I think I owe it to Hamm to at least try, don't you?"

Vita smiled. "It would be fun. To see Earl's face."

"Can you come back up here tomorrow, Vita, so we can talk some more about it?"

"I guess so. But just to talk. I'll be there for lunch."

There was a pause on the other end.

"Oh, all right… make it breakfast."

They say people two blocks away heard Earl Finley yelling when he heard the news.

Vita Green had called her good friend Peter Wheeler, whose wife had just died, and talked him into moving to Jefferson City to help her run Betty Raye's campaign. It was an interesting choice, considering Peter Wheeler had run against Hamm in his first governor's election and it was at a party at his home where Betty Raye and Vita first met.

Earl Finley vowed he was not going to take this sitting down. He had tried to get rid of Betty Raye in a nice, devious way but now he was taking off the gloves in an all-out assault. As head of the Missouri Democratic Party, he declared her candidacy invalid and refused to support her.

This forced her to run as an independent.

Le Roy Oatman and the Missouri Plowboys geared up one more time. From the first, her polling numbers were so low they set a state record. As hard as she tried, she was still so shy that when she got up to speak everyone could see her knees shaking. And even when they hid her behind a larger podium, she frequently dropped her speeches to the floor. If there were men who would not vote for a woman even when she had Hamm behind her, almost none would vote for a woman without any man behind her. One editorial said, "It seems Mrs. Sparks, unlike the rest of the state, has forgotten that she was never considered anything more than a paper governor. One cannot help but suspect she is being used once more as a pawn and to what end is unknown. However, to prevent further embarrassment to herself, her children, and the memory of her late husband, Mrs. Sparks needs to step aside and go on about her real business, that of housewife and mother."

Carnie Boofer and the rest of the candidates ignored her at first but as time went by Carnie could not resist taking a swipe at her. In his first paid-for television address he ended up by saying, "As far as the little lady that is running, first of all, let me say that most of us respect our females and do not question their abilities but who of us here would feel right about letting our wives or daughters be subjected to the rough-and 408 a Fannie Flags tumble world of politics. This is a world where tough decisions have to be made every day. I am sure Mrs. Sparks is a lovely lady but having said that, I must point out the fact that an ex-gospel singer and one-time cafeteria worker with barely a high school education is sorely ill-equipped to run a state.