Robert McGill - Once We Had a Country

“What mistake could there be?” he says, sounding too innocent by half. “I am coming as your employee. We will be very proper with each other.” The wry confidence with which he says it makes the whole scenario seem ridiculous and manageable at once.

“I’m being serious,” she says. “You make it sound simple, but everything feels messy.”

“Simple and messy,” he replies. “Yes, that is just about right.”

When he tells her he has to go, she says she understands. He doesn’t offer any expression of affection, nor does she. Maggie has the feeling that he’s as uncertain as she is about what lies ahead. At this moment in Jamaica, standing there with the receiver in his hands, he might even share the same adolescent thrill from their conversation that’s passing through her. One day, she worries, somebody’s going to discover that behind her breasts and hips there’s a little girl at the helm, frantically pulling levers to keep up the illusion of a mature human being. A week ago she turned twenty-five, and still she has some way to go before she can call herself grown-up.

Once she’s sitting at the table again, she removes the reel from the editing machine and replaces it with footage of the construction site she filmed two weeks ago. Putting her index finger on the power switch, she toggles it back and forth a few times, half with indecision, half in playfulness, before flicking it into action. Thirty minutes until the others return—not enough time for any major changes. Just a snip here, a cutaway shot there, enough to try out one or two ideas she’s had and make things a bit better than they were before. Already she can picture everyone seated tonight before the white sheet they’ve hung against the wall, watching what she has pieced together. It will be an easy pleasure for them.

The sun streams through the barracks window onto all the floating dust, making curtains of the air. Maggie returns her gaze to the editing machine’s little rectangle of light. Blinking a few times, she feels a brief, unexpected spasm of happiness and gets down to work.

Thanks to Ema Jelinkova for her expertise on Czech matters, to Grace McGill for details about life on the Niagara Peninsula, and to Marcy and Bruce McGill for reminiscing about television. I’m also grateful to Russell Brown and Denise Bukowski for sharing their memories of moving to Canada during the Vietnam War, and to Susan Sheard and Andy Strominger for talking with me about life on communes.

With regard to the “secret war” in Laos, I’m particularly indebted to histories written by Fred Branfman, Jane Hamilton-Merrit, and Judy Austin Rantala. Regarding the seasonal workers programme that first brought Jamaicans to Niagara farms in 1966, I’m grateful to Vincenzo Pietropaolo, Aziz Choudry, Jilly Hanley, Steve Jordan, Eric Shragge, and Martha Stiegman for their documentary efforts, and to Puddicombe Farms in Stoney Creek, Ontario.

The Harvard Society of Fellows and the Department of English at the University of Toronto generously provided me with the time I needed to write this novel. Natasha Bershadsky, Amanda Lewis, Grace O’Connell, Siobhan Phillips, David Staines, John Sweet, and Luke Williams were astute readers, while Sara Salih was a brilliant collaborator. Euan Thorneycroft and Denise Bukowski’s efforts on behalf of the novel have been extraordinary, and I’m grateful to Dan Franklin for his commitment to it. Finally, thanks to Anne Collins for her marvellous editorial work, and to Fiona Coll, whose acuity and support are daily gifts.

ROBERT MCGILL was born and raised in Wiarton, Ontario. His first novel, The Mysteries , was named one of the top five Canadian fiction books of 2004 by Quill & Quire , and his short fiction has appeared in The Journey Prize Anthology and Toronto Life . His non-fiction book, The Treacherous Imagination: Intimacy, Ethics, and Autobiographical Fiction , is forthcoming. A Rhodes Scholar and fellow with the Harvard Society of Fellows, he lives in Toronto, where he writes and teaches.

“ Once We Had a Country crackles and sweats as it sweeps us from the farmlands of Niagara to the steamy jungles of Laos. With his elegant prose, Robert McGill forces us to question what we believe in, what we love, and just how much we’re willing to sacrifice.”

“ Once We Had a Country explores the hubris of missionary work and the naiveté of living off the land. The predicaments of a father and daughter illuminate the troubles that can plague our efforts to encourage love. Robert McGill examines the inner workings of the outsider’s life, both here and abroad. A complex and compelling read.”

“Like a troubled dream I couldn’t shake, Once We Had a Country drew me in and held me captive. Robert McGill’s characters took up residence in my heart with all their baggage. They’re still there.”

“A talented writer, adept at expressing the nuanced, unspoken truths that beg the lies by which we live.”

“A young writer of remarkable talent and enormous narrative appetites—a storyteller who refuses to keep things straight, and… produces freshly captivating effects.”

PUBLISHED BY ALFRED A. KNOPF CANADA

Copyright © 2013 Robert McGill

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review. Published in 2013 by Alfred A. Knopf Canada, a division of Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto. Distributed in Canada by Random House of Canada Limited.

www.randomhouse.ca

Knopf Canada and colophon are registered trademarks.

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication

McGill, Robert, 1976–

Once we had a country / Robert McGill.

eISBN: 978-0-307-36122-6

1. Vietnam War, 1961–1975—Social aspects—Fiction. I. Title.

PS8625.G54O63 2013 C813′.6 C2012-908375-5

Cover design by Terri Nimmo

Cover image: foxline.com.ua / Flickr / Getty Images

v3.1