K. Randis - Spilled Milk

Sonia tackled me and Carmen shrieked in my ear as they hugged and danced around in a circle with their arms wrapped around me. “You did it! You did it! You made the team Brooke!”

Embarrassed enough to not even smile I realized that I wasn’t sure I even wanted to be part of the team now that Sonia and Carmen weren’t.

“And don’t even think about quitting because we didn’t make it,” Carmen said, reading my thoughts. “You will be awesome. ”

“I think Paul likes you.” Cristin and I made our way through the packed annual west end fair. In two weeks cheerleading practice was going to start.

I wasn’t looking forward to getting up at four thirty in the morning to meet at the high school, but Coach insisted it was better to work out and practice before the sweltering summer sun came up.

“Really?” I looked back at Judd, Paul and Chalky following behind us. “I don’t know, he hasn’t said much to me since I met him last summer. He was even in my health class this year.”

“I think he’s shy. But he keeps looking at you.”

Dodging a kid with a balloon I shrugged my shoulders.

“Have you even had a boyfriend since you’ve moved here?” Cristin pressed.

“Eh, no. Not really.”

I thought about Dad and what he would say if I told him I was dating someone. Since Adam wasn’t even into dating yet and he was a year older than me I couldn’t imagine it would go over well. Work, school and cheerleading took up all my time anyway. I didn’t think a boyfriend would be very patient with waiting for me to cook dinner or clean the house before we could hang out. Sometimes I felt older than I was.

We filed through the amusement rides and stopped every couple of feet to talk to people we knew from class. Judd and Chalky put moves on several girls we talked to while Paul lingered in the background of their conversations.

“Well it’s nine thirty,” Cristin chimed in looking at her phone. “My mom is meeting me out front. Am I driving you home Brooke?”

My mouth opened to answer her and Paul was suddenly standing at my side. “My mom will take her home.”

The same cologne he used the previous summer engulfed me. It was the only thing he’d said all night and it was pretty forward.

“Are you, sure? I mean, I’ve never met your mom…”

“It’s fine.” Paul gave Cristin a head nod. “Go ahead, I got her.”

You got me?

Cristin raised an eyebrow and tried to stifle a smile. “Okayyy if you say so Paulie. See ya later Brooke.” She wrapped her hands around my neck and whispered quick words of girlish encouragement in my ear.

Cristin disappeared into the crowd and Paul turned to me. “So, you want to walk around a little while these fools try and play their A game?”

He nodded in the direction of Judd and Chalky. They were engrossed in conversation and didn’t even look up when Paul put his hand on my shoulder to steer me around a group of people to head towards the concession stands.

“So, we had health together.” Paul scuffed his sneakers across the gravel as he pretended to check out everything in sight, except me. He acted so odd.

“Didn’t think you noticed. I sat right behind you the entire time.” I said. “You never said a word to me.”

“It was first period, I didn’t say a word to anybody. Not really a morning person.”

“Oh.”

“And I noticed.”

“Huh?”

“You said I didn’t notice,” he pointed out. “But I did. I noticed you.”

He shifted his gaze to mine and lingered a second too long. “Not like you noticed me.” He swayed closer to me and nudged my shoulder. “I don’t blame you. Everyone notices you though.”

“Oh, shut up.” I laughed and nudged him back. “Who notices me? I’m not exactly Miss Popular. I haven’t even had a boyfriend since I moved here.” I echoed Cristin’s comment.

“Oh?”

We stopped in front of the display of John Deere tractors and he opened up the cabin of a larger one. “After you.” He nodded in the direction of the cabin.

Making sure no one was looking, I hopped up into the cabin and he shut the door behind us. Crowds of people passed by but unless you knew we were up there, no one would see us. We both shifted and put our feet up on the dashboard.

The warmth of his body danced near my skin. “Yea, I don’t really see you with other guys,” he said. “Except Judd. You guys got a thing?”

“Me and Judd?” I said, laughing at the thought. “No, nothing there. He’s my best friend and everything I just…” I shrugged. “I just don’t think of him like that, you know?”

Paul leaned forward and put his right arm behind me to inch closer. His emerald eyes glazed over my face and I raised my eyebrows when his fingertips brushed my hand.

“That’s good… If that’s what you want, I mean.” His hand was now wrapped around mine and I could feel his breath on my nose.

“Look I know, we haven’t really hung out and stuff…alone. But I like you. A lot.”

Thankful that the cabin only let in two unimpressive streams of light I tried to calm the blood rushing to my face.

“Will you go out with me?”

I opened my mouth but nothing came out.

Paul’s lips brushed against mine. Both of us afraid to move, I froze there. He formed his lips around mine and laid a soft kiss on the corner of my mouth. I remembered to breathe.

“Paul, wow.” He leaned away to wait for my reaction.“I think…” I started. Don’t embarrass yourself. “I think I like you too. We don’t know each other, really, you know? Maybe we should just, hang out a few times. See what happens?”

I never had to reject anyone before and I wasn’t sure if what I said was the right thing. I didn’t want to push him away, because the feeling was definitely mutual.

Looking up I cringed to see his eyes go soft, but he nodded his head in a few slow motions. “Yea. We should hang out. You’re right.” A sigh escaped as he smiled and brushed a piece of hair from my face. “I’d like that. Maybe we should head out now?”

Paul’s mom looked me over with a raised eyebrow as I hopped into the backseat of their minivan. Paul asked her to take me home. “So, you’re fifteen like Paulie? You guys have classes together at school?”

Paul groaned. “Ma, come on.”

“Just want to know who she is honey. I’m Gina. Nice to meet you Brooke.”

Paul squeezed my hand as we pulled into my driveway. “You need me to walk you inside?”

“Oh, no, don’t.” I knew I said it too fast and looked at Gina staring at me from the rear view mirror. “It’s fine, just need to walk to the door. No biggie. I’ll see you later.”

Paul and I talked over AIM instant messenger for the next week as I got ready for practice to start. He wanted to hang out but I wasn’t sure how I could explain hanging out with just Paul to my dad. Going to Judd’s was different because there were always one or two other people there.

Practice for cheerleading was no joke. We ran the bleachers, did several sets of intense jump rope cardio and lifted weights. I never thought of cheerleading as a sport, but I guess when my life depended on having physically fit girls underneath me to catch my fall it made sense.

Coach blared into her megaphone from the bleachers as we ran laps and did push-ups. “Let’s move it girls! If you stop, we go again. If you slow down, we go again. Your choice, move it!”

I struggled to keep up with the words and movements of the cheers and chants. Only one other girl who made the JV team had never done cheerleading before, but she had a cousin on the team who worked with her after school. The girls were not exactly inviting, especially because I had taken over a flyer position that technically was not up for grabs. I had replaced Jessie, and she became the side base for my stunts.