William Gaddis - J R

— No sir I got my whole pay here, I just need Some change to call up my…

— So do I that’s where I’m going, now…

— Hey sir…? came after him bursting through doors to the pavement — could I go with you then…?

— Don’t give a God damn where you go, he came on down one curb, up the next bumped left, right by elbows, muzzled umbrellas, a yellow fender, finally through the whirl of a revolving door toward where it said desserts to thrust the crumpled bill under the glass and recover a spray of nickels bumping chairs, tables, coming up with a handful of cardboards for the one soiled white as he sank into the booth and dialed, a foot braced up against its open door eyed across an empty coffee cup drummed by a finger sporting a cat’s eye ring, shaken by the abrupt departure of an expanse of print dress for the next booth with the hasty removal of an earring, the clatter of the door. — Hello…? I’m calling a Mister Bast, is this his…

— Just a minute… came at his ear, — I’ll see if Mister Bast got back yet… echoed somewhere beyond his foot as the door of the next booth shuddered open. — Mister Bast? Is Mister Bast here…?

— Hello, Miss…? he came slowly forward lowering the phone.

— Hello? No Mister Bast didn’t get back to the office yet. You want me to say who called?

— It’s just a, a personal call… by now he was half out of the booth, — do you…

— He went away on this business trip but he should be back any time now, do you…

— Miss…? he reached round to tap the floral prospect bulging from the next booth — you wouldn’t happen to…

— Did you want to leave him a message?

— Say, Madam…? he reached in — look I’m standing right here… and he pulled his arm back as the doors crashed closed.

— Look buddy… the cat’s eye tapped him from behind, — can’t you see she’s on the phone?

— What? Thanks a lot… he grabbed the phone left dangling behind him — hello…? Sorry yes, I was calling Mist… yes but do you expect him back today? This is a pers… No look frankly I called to see if he could advance me ten dol… I don’t expect to bump into him no, that’s why I’m call… Fine yes, he should call in for an urgent message about an appointment with his boss tomorrow look why the hell do you think I’m calling him if I… hello?

— Hey sir…?

— Now look sailor I’m about at the end of my, wait got a cigarette? The next booth clattered open on its floral emergency — thanks I can light it! he came up with two more nickels to dial again — now beat it will you sailor? Things are getting, hello? Mister Eigen please, in… no Eigen, Thomas Eig…

— Hey sir?

— God damn it will you, hello? No, no in public relations, Eigen, e, i…

— But hey sir? Your shoelace is on fire.

— I said beat it! bugger, what the… he had a foot up, slapping it — bugger off! God damn it what, Eigen? Tom…?

Silence came summoned in the snap of a button to suffuse the line.

— You have a call on two nine, Mister Eigen.

— Tell them I can’t, no never mind. Hello…? Oh, Gibbs? Jack? I thought you’d call yesterday when you… oh. I can’t, I can let you have ten though, if you… your shoelace what…? Look Jack I’ll have to call you back, things here are… What key, to Ninety-sixth Street? No if you’ve lost yours… well borrow mine then come down after work, down… no down to the apartment I’ll go straight home, I have to pack for… What? No I have to go to Germany tomorrow, one of these damned… No but come down for a drink, I have to talk to you about Schramm anyhow before I leave, he’s… I can’t go into it now, he’s been giving them a rough time and they may release him before I get back, so you’ve got to… No he knows he’s lost the eye, they told him…

— Mister Eigen? Mister Davidoff is on two seven.

— Jack? I’ve got another call, I’ve got to… hold on then, give Florence your number and I’ll call you right back… Hello? Yes this is… Miss Bulcke? Is Mister Davidoff calling me on…

— Mister Eigen! Mister Eigen, quickly!

— What…

— Mister Eigen there’s this man out here you’ve got to come out, he says he wants to see you he’s shouting at Carol and he’s, there’s this dirty bandage all over his face and he can hardly…

— Yes yes wait Christ, excuse me Miss Bulcke just a moment, Florence? What’s the, call back the man who was on two nine and…

— He went off Mister Eigen, he said something about his shoelace but quickly, this man’s going to…

— Yes yes I’ll be right there, let me just… hello? Miss Bulcke, will you tell Mister…

— Hello. Hello? Mister…

— Eigen?

— Mister Eigen? Mister Davidoff is…

— Eigen you on deck there? I want, oh and Miss Bulcke call Colonel Moyst and tell him we’ll send a messenger down to hand carry Mister Eigen’s orders, he needs them tonight and oh and tell Carol to put my calls through here, Eigen? I’m topside in Beaton’s office small brush fire but before you leave I want to run through this speech again, we can’t have another Plato rhymes with Miss Bulcke? While you’re still on deck tell Moyst to make sure we have CIPAP in Mister Eigen’s orders, if he doesn’t go CIPAP he might as well stay at Miss Bulcke? Are you on? Where did she, Eigen? Before you leave I… what? Who’s out there look if it’s the man from this Taiwan medical relief outfit just give him the red carpet treatment, take him out and tie one on yes but before you leave I want to give this speech one more… oh he’s right there now? No go ahead go out and tie one on with him and when you’re back in the office we’ll give this… no, then I’ll call you at home, oh and Eigen…? He stood intent on the phone’s silence and then reached it across the desk toward its cradle. — Another brush fire, this Taiwan…

— I know all about it but we can’t go into it now… the phone was caught before it came to rest, a button came to light, — Governor Cates is out in the, oh Miss Bulcke, please don’t put any more calls through here until Mister Davidoff and I are finished, unless Mister Cutler… yes of course. Now. Governor Cates is out in the board room, and before I go in there I need every detail of the settlement you authorized on this threat of a minority stockholder…

— Look Beaton, before you go in there and shoot off your mouth you’d better have all the angles or you’ll walk out of that board room without a pot to piss in.

— Precisely. And I don’t think we have to conduct this discussion in the gutter. Now…

— And don’t precisely me. Go in there trying to dig my grave with your preciselys and you’ll be lucky to walk out with your hat and your ass.

The papers rattled in Beaton’s hands on the desk before him, and he cleared his throat. — All right. Now apparently on the basis of this rather, amateurish letter to say the least, if you look at the spelling, let alone the typing, you authorized payment to settle this threatened minority stockholder’s suit by the class of…

— Out of the PR budget, right, and any…

— I think the point here is…

— The point here is the PR budget is my budget Beaton, and any interference from you or…

— Yes all right, all right. Let’s simply try to take one thing at a time then. Here is our check, drawn on your authorization, in the amount of one thousand eight hundred sixty-two dollars and fifty cents, returned to us paid by a bank somewhere in Nevada over an endorsement that appears…

— Will you tell me why you’ve got your balls in an uproar over eighteen hundred dollars? I’ve paid that much for one speech, Beaton. One speech. Do you know what I’m paying the name writer we’re getting to do the…