William Gaddis - J R

— Just, just stay away from me after this Gibbs just, just keep away…

— Yes well let’s ahm ahm let’s all ahm, these tickets yes here Mister Gibbs if you’d turn them in on your way to the train yes ten forty, not the train no the ten forty that is to say you’ve missed that of course yes the ten dollars and forty cents we reimbursed the boy who turned them in from a field trip of Mrs ahm ahm, Bast yes I was told Mister Bast helped out but no one’s been able to ahm, seen hide nor ahm…

— Can’t waste any more company time like this Whiteback, I’m due over at…

— Of course yes after you Major ahm, hair that is to say hair nor hide you were going to see Sister Agnes cut up a frog I think you said we all have somewhere to go, Dan? Let’s ahm, have somewhere to go I think Coach wanted to discuss your wife’s ahm of course he can’t discuss anything like that now he has a gym period yes I have to get to the nurse’s office, the fourth graders there they seem to be conducting a sitdown or ahm, in is it…

— Mister Gibbs you, are you all right?

— What? oh Dan, fine yes I…

— You look white your, here…

— Fine I said! I just, just mad as hell at myself losing my temper at that God damned…

— Yes well you shouldn’t have tried to pull his…

— First God damned rule never hit somebody you don’t like, you coming out?

— Yes, yes I… he stood there tugging at the glass door that never yet had opened in, and then stepped through the one held wide beside it — I could ride you to the station…

— Thanks no I’ll walk, I have to stop at the Post Office…

— That’s yes that’s where I’m going I’m expecting something from an executive placement ah, place I hoped I could talk to you about this sometime, I thought I saw you in the station in New York I thought I could ride out with you but you were meeting a, a young lady I guess you were going to ride her someplace so I didn’t want to wait where’s my car… he sought down the row of stares leveled in chromed grimaces for the familiar ptosis left from a jump up a curb into a fire hydrant, — down there yes where those boys, where are they going…

— Choir practice, that’s Hyde’s share in America the urchin with the head like a toothbrush, nothing pansy about him is there looks like something from a God damned German vintage orphanage…

— But they shouldn’t be going off the, boys…! Oh but wait aren’t you…

— Thanks no I’m in a hurry Dan, I’ll walk…

— Yes but, but, well, boys…! Where are you going…!

— Come on don’t stop hey, this way… they made for the reek of asphalt clouding Burgoyne Street, — so then what happened…

— Nothing he just said if they catch me in there again using the telephone they’ll have to resort to these here disciplinary measures, I mean what am I sup…

— Okay but if you do what you said boy are you going to get in trouble, I mean that’s forgery boy.

— What do you mean forgery I just scribbled this here name which it’s nobody’s down at the bottom where it says arthurized by, I mean you think the telephone company goes around asking everybody is this here your signature? All they care it says requisition order right across the top so they come stick in this here telephone booth.

— You’ll find out boy you think Whiteback won’t be pissed off when the school gets this bill for…

— That’s how much you know they don’t pay them they pay the school, the telephone company pays the school like this here commission to have this phone booth in there so I’m like helping the school out, I mean like the more calls…

— How do you know, I mean boy what a bunch of…

— I called them up what do you think, I mean what am I suppose to do run over to the candy store all the time? Or like home I mean suppose I get some deal going where they call me up so they get some lady that says yes this is J R’s mother could I help you? I mean what kind of…

— Look out you want to break the door? That’s U S government property boy…

— So what they got plenty of money.

— You’ll find out boy look, didn’t you ever see this little sign? Penalty for theft is five hundred dollars fine or one year in prison that’s for stealing this shitty little ballpoint pen boy you bust a door and they’ll…

— That’s a bunch of crap they’re like nineteen cents, I mean who wants to steal it anyway move your elbow, I just want to use it… he bent to the minuscule effort of lettering Investors Fullfilment Corp on a money order blank.

— You’ll find out boy, what did you get let’s see hey, I mean where’s this big check you been yelling about.

— That’s my business, come on you’re dropping all the…

— Inventors Information Kit boy what a, record of invention look. Be it known that I residing at state of have invented certain new and useful I mean you couldn’t invent shit, you want to trade it hey?

— For what, move will you? I’m trying to…

— I mean what a bunch of, look. To the individual inventor the world is his oyster, what good is that I mean somebody already invented one. You want to trade it?

— Okay for what! The silent defender, made of lightweight aluminum look hey your crap’s even getting mixed up in the stuff in my portforlio here, coitus splint made of finest spring steel will you…

— Give it here then I mean go ahead invent an oyster if you think you’re so, wait hey look you got a package, if it’s this clock I get it this time okay? I mean if it says class six J and all why shouldn’t…

— Okay! How do I know what it is look I’m trying to do something!

— Go ahead and do it, you want me to get the pack…

— Go ahead…! he dug among paper scraps and envelopes for a letter four lines long of skips and smudged erasures, licked the ballpoint to grind in initials, pounded a stamp on US SAVings and loan Ass R eno Nev and came in a turn for the Money Order window digging for the wad of bills with a sudden stoop after a penny rolling toward Parcel Post.

— Look out!

— Holy…

— It’s not my fault look, the box was already bust…

— Okay! just help pick them up…

— Look the whole end’s busted, what’s, what are they sup…

— Nothing! just these here little cards will you help pick them up before somebody…

— No but what do they, wait a second is…

— Look you don’t need to read them! just, just pick them up!

— No but, him…?

— What’s so funny!

— He’s your business representive, Edwerd Bast?

— What’s so funny about that!

— I mean he doesn’t know shit look he can’t even spell his own name Edwerd look, e d…

— I said quit laughing! How do you know so much anyway and I mean he didn’t even spell it, he…

— Because I got this here Uncle Edward that’s why, it’s w a what do you mean he didn’t spell it, I bet he doesn’t even know it…

— So what! boy if you don’t quit laugh…

— Then how do you know he’ll even do it, he doesn’t know…

— Because he will that’s why!

— He doesn’t know shit about business how can…

— So what! I’ll give him these here same little books to read up come on just pick them up…

— Then how come you even put this little telephone number he’s not even around anyplace, he…

— That’s my business look shut up will you, Mister Gibbs just came in you think I want to broadcast the whole…

— Okay but he’s not even around anyplace, my father said…

— That’s how much you know boy he has to come by the school to pick up this here check they owe him doesn’t he?

— Yeah well my father said he said s, h, i t on the tv he better not show his face…