William Gaddis - J R

— I hoped he’d say hire smart people, Davidoff winked disappointment past his shoulder to them.

— That’s right hire smart people… he paused folding away his glasses from a glance down at the pencil stub grinding on the yellow pad, — but run things yourself.

— Is that what you’re going to do at Washington?

— What’s, where’d she…

— Where this says here taking leave of his leading role in private industry to join the official family as undersec…

— Where did, that in this damn kit too Dave?

— Must have, one of the girls must have dropped it in we, boys and girls? That’s just a, it’s what we call a news release it’s just a story about something that’s going to happen and we write it to help out the newspapers so that when the…

— Like you get to write this here news which it didn’t even happen yet?

— Well that’s not exactly what, what I mean boys and girls a story like this we haven’t told anybody yet because Mister Moncrieff’s appointment hasn’t really been made yet officially so let’s, yes let’s keep it like a club secret shall we? One for all and, and I think I smell those box lunches…

— All right everyone no more questions, let’s…

— No but I just wanted to go to the boys’ room.

— Here I’ll take him while we see about these box lunches… Hands went up everywhere.

— Two at a time then, two at a time…

— Here, here this way… he caught the bowl of a cropped head in one hand, the sweater’s gap at the narrow shoulder in the other steering an abrupt turn up the corridor, stopping to rattle keys.

— How come you lock up the toilets.

— It’s the executive washroom now just hurry up in there, come back and join the others…

— Wait can we get out all right? Let’s see hey…

— Try it see if it opens from inside.

— Okay it turns, they must be scared somebody’s going to steal their toilets look at this hey.

— Push it, didn’t you ever see one?

— All this hot air’s coming out hey look out, somebody’s in that one… they came up the row of metal doors stooped hands to calves, looking under. — These two…

— Somebody forgot to flush mine. Shhh…

— What.

— Shhh, somebody just came in…

— Damn fool don’t have the sense to avoid taxable income like the plague what the devil’d he think would happen… black shod feet crowned by gray cuffs shuffled up the rank of doors, — obsession he’s got about running low-cost operations didn’t even look at the damn tax angle did he?

— I thought Wiles handled the whole thing for him… burnished bluchers followed, drawing heads down to rest on dropped wales of corduroy where they peered under the doors.

— Damn it Monty think Frank Wiles would have let that happen? Situation like that got out and spent something could have turned his whole damn tax picture around let the damn government’s money work for him for a change how the devil’s he think the damn phone company got where they are… a urinal flushed emphatically and one black shod foot rose in a brief glimpse of hornpipe. — Don’t know the first simple damn rule there is buy for credit sell for cash now he wants the bank to step in and bail him out? Had any damn sense he would have taken what he could borrow against those assets when he had them, used that to build up their value where he could have borrowed enough to pick the whole damn thing up he’d have it to borrow against now… A toilet flushed. — That you in there Beaton?

— Yes sir.

— What’s the latest on Diamond.

— Twenty sir.

— Get Wiles tell him to buy at nineteen.

A urinal flushed long and patiently. — I just don’t want any repercussions when this tender comes up, if…

— Being sold on the open damn market isn’t it? Company buying from its own assets no damn legal question till its capitalization’s reduced by a third no need for any damn press statement on it either, make sure that what’s his name knows it where the devil’d he come from Monty.

— Dave? He’s all right, goes off half cocked sometimes but he works hard even puts in Saturdays…

— So do the damn cleaning women keep an eye on him hear me Beaton?

A restrained trickle of water sounded behind them. — Dave? that you in there?

Black, burnished, black, the shoes turned to point toward the ranked metal doors as one came slowly open, then the other, with a cinching of belts. — Well by, what the devil are they doing here, get an earful did you boys?

— No we didn’t even…

— Why not… he tore off a paper towel and blew his nose, — hear more straight talk in the washroom than you will at twenty board meetings… and he held the paper towel off to look into it before he wadded it up. — Anything else we can tell you?

— Well I just wondered what you said about…

— Are you a millionaire?

— Millionaire? What would you do with a million dollars, you tell me that.

— Me? First I’d get this great big place with like these electric fences and…

— Be a damn fool too wouldn’t you, he muttered as the carpeting swallowed their footsteps in the corridor. — You in this class of Mrs Joubert’s are you? Mean she’s never told you the only damn time you spend money’s to make money?

— She did too hey I mean that’s what we’re having where she said your money should work for you or it’s like this here lazy partner which you…

— Think she’s pretty smart do you?

— Sure she’s real smart, like…

— Real smart is she? She ever teach you what money is?

— Like anybody knows that I mean, wait, here like this here quarter is…

— What most damn fools think, next time you just tell her money is credit, get that?

— It’s what?

— Tells you your money should work for you you tell her the trick’s to get other people’s money to work for you, get that?

— Sure but…

— There they are… Davidoff rounded a corner ahead, — oh and Carol…

— Dave, that press statement…

— All squared away Boss… Davidoff hurried the boys ahead of him, — we had to clear them out of the board room Boss I think a pipe in the ceiling went, oh Carol… they rounded the corner behind her, — that press release I want to see it before it goes out, just a few word changes…

— But it went out already, you said…

— You mean it really went out? Well get the, get them on the phone. Wait. Get a pad. Got a pad?

— Hey wait all my stuff in that room hey that stock we bought’s in there wait…

— It’s all right your teacher got it hurry up… he pulled a door and they broke out on the hard floor to round the corner on a massive panel of black on white stroked with a mad reserve, — Carol? In the first paragraph for attributing the stock’s activity just read attributing the activity in nickel futures trading… he swerved them toward the elevators past a man balancing the huge canvas, — and in the second paragraph, for…

— Hey buddy where do you want this thing.

— Just, just lean it there don’t drop it get into the, wait I’ll have to show you where the board room is, Carol? he got the elevator button with a stab as one behind him ejected a figure hung with bags and cameras pursued by a cartload of white boxes — wait here’s the pho, doesn’t matter look Carol get these kids over to the automat with the others where’s…

— I got the wrong subway.

— Never mind forget it just get me proofs of the pictures you got downtown here get those box, wait… he came on empty hands fighting his tie, — Gov…

— This it?

— This is yes sir this is the painting Governor, the one we…