Wilson Harris - Palace of the Peacock

“I never been to London or to a zoo,” daSilva yawned lugubriously. “And I didn’t tell you nothing about vulture. Is parrot Ah seeing and one got a ring on she foot. O God you think I blind or what? How you can’t see it I don’t know. You mean is another dream Ah dreaming?” He turned wooden and still, speaking almost to himself in the lapping whispers water made against the boat when the wind blew. “Ah been dreaming far far back before anybody know he born. Is how a man can dream so far back before he know he born?” He looked at Cameron with conviction and enquiry in his eye.

“Because you is a big fool,” Cameron cried. “A fool of fools. Look at you. You face like a real dead man own. I hungry.” He tried to laugh and his tongue was black. “I going nail and drop one of them vulture bird sure as stones….” The novel idea seemed to wake nearly all of the crew from boredom and they stared in encouragement as Cameron felt in the bottom for a rock.

“I is a fool yes, a foolish dead man,” daSilva puffed, “but I seeing me parrot. Is no vulture bird….”

“What in heaven name really preying on you sight and mind, Boy?” Cameron suddenly became curious. “I only seeing vulture bird. Where the parrot what eating you?”

“Ah telling you Ah dream the boat sink with all of we,” daSilva said speaking to himself as if he had forgotten Cameron’s presence. “Ah drowned dead and Ah float. All of we expose and float….”

“Is vulture bird you really feeling and seeing,” shouted Cameron. His voice was a croak in the air. DaSilva continued — a man grown deaf and blind with sleep — “Ah dream Ah get another chance to live me life over from the very start. Live me life over from the very start, you hear?” He paused and the thought sank back into the stream. “The impossible start to happen. Ah lose me own image and time like if I forget is where me sex really start….”

“Fool, stop it,” Cameron hissed.

“Don’t pick at me,” daSilva said. “The impossible start happen I tell you. Water start dream, rock and stone start dream, tree trunk and tree root dreaming, bird and beast dreaming….”

“You is a menagerie and a jungle of a fool,” Cameron’s black tongue laughed and twisted.

“Everything Ah tell you dreaming long before the creation I know of begin. Everything turning different, changing into everything else Ah tell you. Nothing at all really was there. That is”, he grew confused “that is nothing I know of all me life to be something …” He stopped at a dead loss for words open mouthed and astonished as if he had been assaulted by the madness and innocence of the stream.

“Tek a batty fool like you to dream that,” said Cameron. “A batty fool like you …”

“Is a funny-funny dream,” daSilva said slowly, recovering himself a little. “To dream all this …” he pointed at the wall of cliff behind him — “deh pon you back like nothing, like air standing up….”

“You got a strong-strong back,” Cameron croaked and his hands brushed the water with beak and wings.

“Is true,” daSilva sulked. His mind grew suddenly startled and punctured as the stream. “I know is who bird now,” he gasped and shouted. “I remember clear.” He pointed at the parrot and the silver ring with such swamping eagerness and enthusiasm the words drowned on his lips … “Is me … is mine …”

The crew rippled and laughed like water so loud and long that Donne awoke to their merriment.

“What? what is it?” he said.

“Laugh good,” daSilva warned. “You going laugh good again like a guest at me true marriage and wedding feast….”

“Must be in heaven,” Cameron croaked and roared in Donne’s ear.

“Is me lady bird,” daSilva insisted. “It must be fly away from she for a morning outing. Them people ain’t deh far,” he cried in a burst of inspiration. “The lil bird tekking a morning outing … I know it. Last year when Ah been with she in the Mission Ah feed it meself often. It used to eat from me lip. Tame Ah tell you. Is me mistress bird.” He whistled.

“It’s good news then,” said Donne. “Yesterday we witnessed the huntsman’s promissory wound and today daSilva’s promissory ring….” he laughed. “The folk are close at hand to save us.” He did not believe a word he said in his heart and he added a warning note — “Of course you chaps mustn’t bank on anything too much. A bird like that can fly a hundred miles in an hour. Still we must hope for the best.” He smiled stiffly, waving his hand darkly to greet the air.

“I feed it often from me lip,” daSilva said whistling loud. “Me pretty lady bird. She and me was one flesh. I going many she this time. Ah tell you. Look she leg slender. Slender like … like …” he stared unseeingly … “a branch …” he was uncertain.

“Like poison,” said Cameron.

“Slender branch,” said daSilva as if he was drunk. “And she taste sweet. Me mistress breasts like sweet cocerite. She got sweet-sweet honey lip too. And she hair long and black like midnight feathers. Ah kiss she eyes fast and thick till she nearly dead in me hand….”

“What a vulture of a bird you are,” Cameron grinned in derision. “You never speak a truer word than when you say you got everything mix up in you head….” He had hardly stopped speaking when he flung a stone and bird past Jennings’ head. Aimlessly. The crew gave a sudden answering cry. The stone had cut air and flesh and it fell. But on fluttering upon the water it recovered itself instantly and wings flashed and soared. The whole flock rose in swelling protest higher and higher until all dwindled in the sky at the top of the wall.

“Miss,” Cameron cried.

“You wounded it,” Donne said quietly. “We have given ourselves away as their huntsman gave them away. O never mind I’m sure I’m talking nonsense. I can’t see a thing.”

“I used to feed it from me lip,” daSilva whimpered.

“O shut up,” Cameron waved. “What do you mean — give ourselves away?” he asked.

“O well,” said Donne speaking without conviction, “the bird may return bleeding with a mark upon it. The folk may take it in their heart to start hunting us. We can never outwit them now. Our strength is gone. Three of our best men finished. No ammunition. Nothing remaining. Everything overboard. We can only throw imaginary stones in the air to frighten and alarm ourselves and make imaginary rings in the water….”

“Better we stop and turn back,” said Jennings sombrely.

“Impossible. Where can we land? If we turn back we’re lost. How can we run the rapids in our condition? We do need help more than ever to locate a safe ground trail if we succeed in escaping these walls….” he waved his hands at the cliff. “O it’s a hellish business and trial and responsibility I never foresaw. If one of us —” he stared at them with a glassy eye — “gets across he’ll carry the mark of a beast or a bird I tell you. It’s a wounding dream and task….” he began to ramble and rave. “Let’s hope there’ll be someone there to meet us and heal us in the end whatever we are. It’s all that counts….”

“Ah used to feed she with me lip,” daSilva said.

“O shut up,” Cameron cried. “Who cares?”

“Why did you pelt it?” daSilva cried.

“Wait you going on like if is you I pelt. Aw shut up, I hungry.”

“I ask you why you pelt the ring of me flesh….”

“O Christ, shut up,” said Cameron. “I didn’t pelt you. I didn’t see no precious ring. You is bewitched … that’s what….”

DaSilva muttered wildly — “I tell you when you pelt she you pelt me. Is one flesh, me flesh, you flesh, one flesh. She come to save me, to save all of we. You murderer! what else is you but a plain vile murderer? She ain’t no witch….” His face was mad.