Steve Katz - Kissssss - A Miscellany

This embarrassed Dojie deep into her afternoons, that sometimes her mother was climbing on the Heap when she and her friends were kicking. If she just glimpsed her mother up there she got really embarrassed, afraid one of her friends might say, “Hey, Dojie, there's your mom climbing up.” It was such a total gruel. She had to hide, try to steer her friends the other way, even cover their eyes if they tried to look at the Heap. That was deep snore anyway, so dumb. Who wanted to be reminded of all the stupid shoes? What was so great about walking, anyway? Footwear reaching to the sky? Muckworks galore. Learn to skate some laterals!

Anyway, this was the day that her friend Lenoci Mindak would be out for the first time, with her brand new ultimate body puncture. She was due at the Kick for an exposé session, to show it to all the brideys hanging out at the Trough. Lenoci was so lucky to have parents who'd write a permission for her to do it. Maybe it was because she didn't have a brother at all. And she had a rich uncle who worshipped her and was willing to pay for the whole thing. It was so double ultimate, so totally drashy. Dojie ached to have this herself. She could feel it like a squeezing on her spine. She could taste it in the whole middle of her body. They said it really hurt, but she had no doubt she could stand the pain, if she knew the result would be absolute drash. She always enjoyed the right kind of pain, anyway. She knew there was no way she could afford this, though. Faking the permission would not be a problem; but, as always, money was the big obstacle.

Only one person in the whole world really knew how to do this puncture, and he was willing to do it only for a lot of money. This was Dr. Deppster Johnjon, who lived right here in Monisantaca. He had given up a successful career in abdominal surgery to develop and focus on this puncture, which he told his friends allowed him to transcend the pedestrian world of surgery, into the raunchier realms of art. He was sick of being around the sick people, who only wanted to get better. Better was an illusion, he explained. He wanted healthy people around him to do something grand and cosmetic, make them feel the joy of aperture. His puncture was a total opening of the whole abdomen, from sternum to pelvis. The invention that put his genius on the map was the Deppster Johnjon Full-Body Grommet. He separated the internal organs to either side of the spine, so other people could see through the center of your body, really see daylight, or any kind of illumination for instance if it was night and you were at a party. Needless to say, it's a complicated and controversial procedure. Dr. Johnjon performs this with almost missionary zeal, right in the face of the commission that has him under investigation. For the people who want the procedure, it does a lot of good, he explains. Those who get it are changed profoundly, and those who don't are not affected. They remain the same. Dojie didn't care about any of the arguments, she just wanted herself to be opened up. She was ready as anyone for such a change in her life. But when would she ever have the money to do this? Up-front you had to pay for the grommet itself, which was a spinal casing and organ frame, recommended in gold, though a solid silver economy model was also available. Deppster Johnjon's great invention protected the spine. It had to remain straight. Curving it one way or another could cripple a puncture wannabe (though that might be drashy too, so empty and perverse.) The good young doctor designed this elegant casing for each individual's backbone, and the oval framework against which slimy organs, like liver, spleen, heart, intestines, and whatever else you've got, rested comfortably. The opening came out to look like an oval bisected vertically. It was a phi , looked like a phi. Of all the letters of all the alphabets she knew, she wanted to be the phi. It could be extra spanish, so drippy. The way all her brideys would look right through her. It would be the emptiest, drashier than grosbeaks. Dojie wanted to do this so bad. She had the guts. She had the backbone.

When she saw Lenoci displaying at the Trough, Dojie was very happy for her, but couldn't hold back her envy. Tons of brideys and their drones had come from everywhere to see her; even Eukan's gawks peered through the windows, so Lenoci finally had to raise herself up onto the ledge above the booth, to give everyone a good opportunity to look through her. It was the emptiest. It was the ultimate of drash.

“Dojie, hi,” Lenoci greeted Dojie who pushed through the crowd, holding a stormberry fragratto. “I got those phroa warmworms you sent. They really helped. I've even got some left over, if you want them back.”

“No, Lenoci. They're yours to keep. Use them up.” She'd forgotten she'd sent them. One thing she really knew how to do was to get those warmworms; it was a talent she never even had to cultivate. She just often found that she was there, and there were the phroa warmworms. She supplied them for some of her friends, but only the most nickelish and flaunted, those she knew could handle them. She never sold them. That would be a whole other step, and in the wrong direction, she knew, in her young life. Selling warmworms , deep dangerous gruelmove.

“How does it feel,” Dojie asked, as she slid into the booth, closer to Lenoci. “What's it like?” Dojie looked through Lenoci, to the shiny gold flecks of the formica wallboard. The spine was cased in gold from number four dorsal to number three lumbar, with an embossing of vines and apes climbing the whole length. “Well? What's it like, Lenoci?”

The punctured girl slid off the ledge, to sit down next to Dojie. “It's more ultimate than I ever imagined, Dojie. It's totally vacant.”

“Does it hurt?”

“Still, just a little, but it's like sugar, like sweet pain.”

“Oooh,” Dojie moaned. “I know what you mean. I'm so jealous.” The two friends kissed on the lips.

“You know my brother ran away?” Dojie said.

“Who?”

“Eukan. My brother. I was getting afraid for him with my mom and dad. They were starting to re-amorize, and they were coming at him with those words.”

“Words? I don't understand what you're talking about.” Lenoci had to strain her neck to see Dojie, because her body was wider now, and difficult to turn in the booth. Dojie liked that, thought it was really empty, to be almost two-dimensional. She could understand why Lenoci had some difficulty grasping what she said. In her new shape, she had a lot to figure out. Her friend switched to the other side of the booth, proudly fielding the gasps and exclamations of people gathered for a look-through.

“ Pünksheit words,” Dojie said.

“You believe in that stuff? Pünkscheit and stuff? I don't… ” As Lenoci leaned towards Dojie she grimaced. “Oooh… It still aches me a little, but it's everything so vast,” she moaned. “I'll get used to it.” She took a sip from Dojie's fragratto.

“Yeah, I believe in it. You just don't have a brother, so you don't have to deal. Ask Nonawi. She lost hers, and her parents are schoolteachers.”

Lenoci's attention was elsewhere, partly distracted by the pain, and also because her boyfriend, Negger, was at the door. He never liked to come all the way into the Trough, because he was older. Most of the other kids didn't understand it, how she could go with someone so old, but Dojie did. Negger was really well displayed for an older drone, and young ones were such a snore, anyway.

“Hello, Dojie,” he greeted her, smiling briefly, but ignoring all the other kids. “Lenoci, you have to come with me. I will get my motorcycle out of the shop. You will drive the car.”