James Kelman - A Chancer

Hh!

It was to each other they said it. Anyway, it was my own fault. I let them get away with it. I shouldnt have. I should just have told them straight out from the beginning. Tch, who cares!

Cathy gave her attention to the coffee, making it in two large mugs which she carried and placed on a coffee-table with a glass top. It was between the settee and the other armchair and it was on the other armchair she sat down herself. She was wearing jeans and a jersey and she sat with her legs tucked beneath her. Do you go up the dancing much? she asked.

Naw no that much. Sometimes.

She nodded. It’s eighteen month since I’ve been there. It was a staff dance. I never went to the last yin because of the baby; I was like the side of a house. They’d all have been looking at me, them in George’s work — a bunch of right toffee noses so they are.

Okay if. .

It’s because they work in an office Tammas. They think they are something.

He nodded. Hey is it okay if eh. .? He had the cigarettes in his hand.

Of course. It’s about time for Kirsty’s nap anyway. Isnt it Kirsty! Kirsty! You ready for your nap? Cathy winked at Tammas and went on: Yes now time for your nap Kirsty, a wee baby sleep; you going into the pram?

Kirsty was smiling at her.

I’m going to put you into the pram! And David can stay on the bed. Or will I give him your cot? Eh will I give him your cot? and you can have his pram? Eh? Will I? Cathy had moved from the armchair onto her feet and she was crouching as though about to spring at the girl who laughed aloud and moved back the way in anticipation and then Cathy lunged forwards and grabbed her up, tickling her and making her laugh loudly. And she held her out to Tammas. A kiss for Uncle Tammas?

Kirsty jerked her head away, to peer back over her shoulder.

Come on now Kirsty!

Tammas said, It’s alright Cathy.

Tch! Come on now Kirsty, a kiss for Uncle Tammas! She held the girl out to him and he touched her on the cheek with his nose.

That’s a nose kiss! he said.

A nose kiss! Cathy shook her head.

Kirsty was gazing at him and he winked and pointed at the sweeties on the mantelpiece. They’re for you!

Tch, you’ll spoil her! And as she walked to the door she called, Come on, you bring him!

What?

Cathy paused by the door, jerking her head at the bed: The baby!

Me bring him you mean?

Cathy grinned at Kirsty: Silly man! Isnt he? a big silly man!

Naw but you want me to bring him ben like? he said, half rising from the settee.

Of course.

He continued on across to the bed. The baby was lying on its side, the head at an angle as though looking up the way, and the left arm was up to the face, the fist clenched. Hh! Tammas glanced at Cathy and smiled. What do I do?

What does he do!

Naw eh. . He grinned, rubbed behind his ear. Do I just actually lift him up?

Yeh, of course, but just mind his head and neck, just put your hand under his head, to support it. He’ll no wake up anyway as it happens — he’s like his father, he’ll sleep forever!

Tammas hesitated a moment. He reached down and laid his right hand behind the baby’s head and neck and his left hand onto the shoulder, and lifted him straight up, with the blanket hanging. What about this blanket? he asked.

Just leave it.

He moved the baby out from him and the blanket dropped onto the bed. The baby’s eyelids flickered open. He stared at the face; he was still holding the baby with his right hand behind the head and neck and the left hand balancing at the shoulder.

The door had opened. Cathy was standing in the doorway with her back to it. Come on, she said.

He turned and watched in front of his feet as he followed her out and ben the lobby and into the front room, and he waited while Cathy prepared Kirsty in the cot. So it’s two rooms you’ve got? he asked.

Yeh, and a shower. George put it in two years ago. It adds on to the value if we want to sell it.

It’s a single-end Vi has. . Tammas stared at the baby’s face while speaking.

I know. We’re keeping our eyes open but. Course she’s rented you know Tammas and she was lucky to get it — it was him spoke for her, Milly’s man, what do you call him?

Joe?

That’s right. She was really desperate at the time because of Wylie. He was going to get her. He told everybody he was going to break out and come looking. She was terrified. Terrified! Hh! Vi. You know what like Vi is. Imagine her being terrified!

Cathy had lain Kirsty in the cot and tucked the blankets about her and she laid her hand flatly on the girl’s forehead, keeping it there as she said quietly, A nutcase he was. The whole family. Bloody guns and knives and. . She shook her head. All nutcases.

Tammas sniffed. Cathy was gazing at Kirsty who was not returning the gaze although her eyes were open; but she was almost sleeping; and now her lids closed over. Cathy turned and took the baby from him and she stepped over to put him down into the pram.

Nothing more was said until they had returned to the kitchen. Tammas sat down on the settee. What about that guy Stan? he asked. I mean he seems to do alright by her and that I mean he doesnt seem anything — no anything bad I mean.

He just fancies her Tammas.

What?

He does, yeh. Anyway, she has to keep on his right side.

Hh.

Cathy glanced at him. What is it?

He shook his head. Nothing. . After a few moments he reached for his cigarettes again.

You smoke an awful lot.

Och, no that much.

How many a day?

Depends. He struck a match, inhaled and exhaled. Sometimes I dont smoke any.

Honest?

Aye, when I’m skint!

Aw, tch! Cathy laughed. She leaned over to punch him on the shoulder. That’s because you’re a gambler! Vi told me.

She seems to tell you a lot!

She doesnt; no really, just sometimes, sometimes she talks about what like Wylie was.

Mm.

Cathy smiled. And Stan, hanging about her like a big sheepdog! She gets them so she does!

Hh, thanks a lot.

No I dont mean you, just these Wylies. But Stan’s different anyway, he’s no like his brother at all. In fact he might no even be his brother, he might be his cousin or something.

After a moment Tammas said, How d’you mean? did Vi say that?

No, I just think it myself.

He nodded.

You never know what Vi’s thinking anyway. Even what she tells you. And it’s like trying to get blood out a stone. Honest, if you’ve ever got a secret go and tell her because she’ll never let it out.

Mm. Cathy. . he dragged on the cigarette before asking, What did you mean when you said she has to keep on that guy Stan’s right side?

No I just meant that in case he told him where she is, Wylie I mean.

In case Stan told Wylie?

Yeh.

D’you think he would?

I dont know, I dont think so, he doesnt seem like that. You’ve met him but what do you think?

Hh, I dont know. . Tammas had been resting back on the settee; now he leaned forwards, his elbows on his knees, gazing into the electric fire.

Cathy stood up from the armchair. I’ll no be long, she said, walking to the door and leaving, shutting it behind herself. Tammas glanced at his watch. There was a stack of magazines on the shelf beneath the glass top of the coffee table and he lifted a few out. They were mainly for women and he leafed through them quickly, pausing to read a couple of pages with letters on personal problems. Then he discovered one which had an article on the wives and girlfriends of National Hunt jockeys. He was still reading it when Cathy came back in. They’re both sound asleep, she said as she closed the door. She had changed out of the jeans and jersey and now had on a skirt and a sort of blouse. She shrugged: When you’re stuck in the house all day you just end up wearing anything. I feel as if I’ve been living in these jeans!