Mo Yan - Frog

Don’t you worry, Yuan Sai said with a conspiratorial wink. I’ll think of something when the time comes.

My daughter was nine days old on the first day of the year of the dog. According to local custom, this was a day of momentous significance, and friends and relatives arrived to help celebrate. We asked Wuguan and Yuan Sai to come over the day before to help us borrow all the tables and chairs, teapots and cups, glasses, plates, and chopsticks we’d need. A rough calculation came up with about fifty people. That meant two tables each in the eastern and western side rooms for the male guests, and one table in Mother’s room for the women. I produced a menu with eight cold plates and eight hot dishes per table, in addition to a soup. Yuan Sai took one look and laughed. This won’t do, my friend. Your guests are all farmers. They’ve got stomachs like bushel bags. What you have there is an appetiser for them. Listen to me, he went on. Forget all the variety and just pile on the meat. That and a big bowl of strong liquor counts as a feast for farming people. You’re being too fancy, and their chopsticks won’t be moving long before it’s all gone; then they’ll wait for more — which won’t be forthcoming. You’ll lose face, big time. I knew he was right, so I had Wuguan go to town for fifty jin of pork, half lean and half fat, and ten braised chickens, the kind with plenty of meat on their bones. Then I went out and ordered forty jin of tofu from Wang Huan, the bean curd peddler, and told Yuan Sai to buy ten Chinese cabbages, ten jin of bean noodles and twenty jin of liquor. Renmei’s family sent over 200 hen’s eggs, and when her father, my father-in-law, saw the preparations, he had a satisfied look. Son-in-law, he said, now you’ve done it. People have always laughed at your family for being cheap, but this lavish arrangement will change that when you send everyone home with a full belly. People who accomplish big things need to do everything in a big way.

About half the guests had arrived when it dawned on me that I’d forgotten to buy cigarettes. So I told Wuguan to go to the co-op to get some just as Chen Bi and Wang Dan arrived with their baby. Wuguan pointed to the gift they’d brought. No need to buy cigarettes, he said.

Chen Bi had done well in recent years, becoming one of the village’s rich men, what we called a ‘ten-thousand-aire’. He’d gone to Shenzhen and brought back some digital watches, which he’d sold to fad-crazy young people. Then he went to Jinan where he bought cigarettes from a wholesaler he knew and had Wang Dan sell them in the marketplace.

I’d seen her peddling them. She’d hung a well-designed device around her neck — a carrying case folded up and a display rack when let down. She’d dressed in a form-fitting blue jacket, with her baby strapped to her back in a cotton poncho, so only her nose showed. Whether they knew her or not, everyone who passed by took careful notice of her. The locals all knew she was the wife of the cigarette merchant Chen Bi, and the mother of the chubby little one on her back; outsiders took pity on the pretty girl who was out selling cigarettes with her baby sister on her back. Folks usually bought her cigarettes out of sympathy.

On this day Chen Bi was wearing a stiff pigskin leather jacket over a cable-knit turtleneck sweater. His face was red, his chin freshly shaved — big nose, sunken eyes with grey irises, hair curled.

Moneybags is here, Wuguan announced.

Moneybags, my eye, Chen Bi said. A small-time entrepreneur is more like it.

Tovarisch, Yuan Sai said. Your Chinese is pretty good, comrade.

Chen Bi raised the package he was holding. I’ll give you a taste of this! he threatened.

Cigarettes? Yuan Sai shouted. Just what everyone’s been clamouring for.

Chen Bi flung the package at Yuan Sai, who caught it and opened it to find four packs of Rooster cigarettes.

A true businessman, he said. How generous.

With that mouth of yours, Yuan Sai, Wang Dan said in a tiny voice, you could make a dead man dance disco.

Aiya, Sister-in-law, pardon my lack of manners, but how come he isn’t holding you in his arms?

I’ll split your lip! she said as she raised her hand threateningly.

Pick me up, Mama… It was Chen Er, who came around from behind her; she was now nearly as tall as her mother.

Chen Er, I said as I bent down and picked her up. How about letting your uncle hold you?

She started to cry, so Chen Bi took her from me and patted her bottom. Don’t cry, Er-er. I thought you wanted to see your uncle the army officer.

Chen Er reached out for Wang Dan.

She’s shy around strangers, Chen Bi said as he handed her to her mother. A moment ago she was fussing about wanting to see her uncle the army officer.

Just then, Wang Renmei smacked her hand against the windowsill. Wang Dan, she shouted, come here!

Carrying her daughter like a big toy in a puppy’s mouth, a sight that was both comical and earnest, Wang Dan waddled over like a cartoon animal, her daughter’s legs wrapped around her.

What a lovely little girl, I said. Like a doll.

How could a Soviet girl not be lovely? Yuan Sai said with an exaggerated wink. Brother Bi, everyone says you’re hard-hearted, that you don’t give your wife a moment’s rest.

Shut your mouth! Chen Bi said.

Go easier on her, Yuan Sai persisted. She’s still going to have to give you a son.

Didn’t I tell you to shut your mouth? Chen Bi gave him a kick.

Okay, already, Yuan Sai said with a laugh. I’ll shut it. But I want you to know how much I envy you. Married all these years, and still enjoying a good hug and a kiss. There’s your proof that love marriages and arranged marriages are nothing alike.

Everybody’s got troubles, and you, for one, don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, Chen Bi said.

I gave Chen Bi’s belly a friendly pat. I see you’ve got a general’s paunch.

Life is good, he said. I never dreamed I’d one day enjoy such a good life.

You can thank Chairman Hua for that, Yuan Sai said.

I’d rather thank Chairman Mao, Chen Bi said. If the old fellow hadn’t up and died, everything would be the same as before.

More guests had arrived and were standing in the yard listening to our conversation. Even those who had gone inside were coming out to see what the commotion was all about.

My cousin Jin Xiu approached Chen Bi, looked up at him, and said, Elder Brother Chen, you’re like a god in our village.

Chen took out a pack of cigarettes, handed one to Jin Xiu, and lit one for himself. Then with his hands thrust into his pockets, he said proudly, So, tell me, what do they say about me?

They say you flew to Shenzhen with only ten yuan in your pocket, Jin Xiu said as he scratched his neck, and that you fell in behind a delegation of Russians. The girls who worked there all thought you were part of the delegation and bowed to you. You responded with Harasho — very good. They say you checked into that fancy hotel with the Russian delegation, that you ate and drank like a king for three days, and that you received a lot of gifts that you turned around and sold on the street, making enough to buy twenty digital watches, which you sold here. You used what you earned to make more money, and it didn’t take long to get rich.

Chen Bi stroked his big nose. Go on, he said, keep the story going.

They say you went to Jinan and roamed the streets until you saw an old fellow wandering aimlessly, and when you asked him why he was crying, he said he’d gone out for a walk and now couldn’t find his way back. You saw him home. The old fellow’s son was the head of the Jinan Supply and Marketing Department, and he rewarded your good deed by declaring himself to be your sworn brother. And that is how you were able to acquire cigarettes wholesale.