Fuminori Nakamura - Evil and the Mask

“There’s always your confession.”

“I’m not going to confess.”

People were starting to straggle into the departure lounge, but it didn’t look like there were going to be many passengers. There were still no more than a couple dozen or so. I got slowly to my feet.

“We’ve known each other for so long, and we’ll never meet again, so I’m only listening out of politeness.”

Aida remained seated, looking up at me.

“I don’t know how to put this,” I went on. “You’ve been a real pain in the ass, and you’ve really pissed me off, but I never disliked you as a person. Look after yourself.”

“What will you do now?” he asked softly.

For some reason the harshness seemed to have faded from his eyes. People were trickling towards the gate.

“I’ll go on living.”

With this I picked up my bag and followed the others towards the entrance. I could feel him staring at my back, but I put my boarding pass in the machine and went into the gangway leading to the plane. Little by little the feeling faded.

Halfway down the passage I stopped, thinking I’d like another cigarette before boarding, but in the end I gave up on the idea because Aida was probably still there. A few other passengers overtook me. When I adjusted my grip on my bag and turned around to start walking again, Kyoko Yoshioka was standing in front of me.

“Huh?”

She looked at my face and laughed quietly. She was wearing a denim jacket and a tight black skirt, with a small bag in her hand.

“You were talking to that strange guy for ages. I thought maybe you were in trouble, but I guess it was okay.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Another weirdo in a shabby suit came and told me you were leaving, handed me a ticket. He had the most penetrating eyes, and I was really suspicious, but it turns out it was true.”

The detective, I thought. His saying about breaking the rules flashed through my mind.

“It’s lonely, isn’t it, going on a long journey by yourself? I also thought, how dare you just take off without telling me!”

“I was planning to email you after I arrived.”

The white corridor was almost deserted.

“Hey, look, maybe I wouldn’t be your first choice, but I’m not that bad, am I? And number two becoming number one, that’s how life goes. Always demanding the best, that’s a strange way of living.”

“I don’t deserve you.”

I looked at her.

“I’ve got nothing, see? Even my money, I’m planning on setting up a charity. I’ve changed my face, I’ve even killed people.”

“But you’re here, aren’t you?”

She stared into my eyes.

“And you’ll keep on going, won’t you?”

A boarding call came over the speakers. She walked off towards the plane, and I followed. When I caught up with her she started talking again.

“My life wasn’t going anywhere, so I thought I should listen to my heart for a change.”

“I might come back to Japan and turn myself in.”

“You’d get a few years, right? That’s what the other guy said. If that happens, well, I’ll make sure I don’t cheat on you.”

After we took our seats, she said she was going to tell me her life story.

“Even if you’re shocked,” she said with a laugh, “we’re on a plane so you can’t escape.”

We fastened our seatbelts and got ready for take-off. Then she glanced sideways at me.

“Before that, though, I’d like to hear yours.”

She took off her denim jacket.

“True, I’ve never really told you, have I?”

The scenery below us changed rapidly as the aircraft gathered speed and left the runway.

“This is the first time I’ve ever told anyone. I’m not sure where to begin.”

We continued our ascent. As I watched the city recede into the distance, I realized that it was filled with millions of lives. Soon the plane passed through a bank of clouds, as though gathering together a bundle of long threads. Above the clouds the sun was blinding.

“Okay, well, when I was eleven my father called me to his study, and this is what he said. ‘Now I’m going to tell you …’ ”

The sunlight streaming in through the windows sparkled in her eyes, and the reflection seemed to shine on me as well. I told myself I had to remember those thin, strong beams forever.