Pete Hamill: North River

There was acceptance in her voice, but no bitterness.

“But…” She paused. “But I keep thinkin’, maybe I can make it easier for everybody. Grace doesn’t need me around, watching her, watching the boy… Maybe I could go. Then she could stay with the boy.”

“Rose —”

“No, listen to me, Dottore.” She turned away, then returned to him, her eyes glistening. “I’ll always love that boy. The rest of my life, I’ll love that boy. He gave me what I missed. A boy. A son.” A pause. “But he gave me something else too. I came to take care of him, and I met you, Jim. That was one of the best things ever happen to me.” A longer pause. “But I don’t want to be the woman that made you lose your daughter and that boy. He has his mother now to take care of him. You don’t need me.”

“Yes, I do,” Delaney said.

He saw her press her upper teeth into her lower lip.

“Don’t play with me, Jim,” she whispered.

“I’m not playing with you, Rose,” he said. “I love you.”

She leaned against him as if melting. He felt oddly lighter now, the words finally said.

“God damn you, Dottore,” she said.

He kissed her hair, inhaled her fragrance.

“Let’s go,” he said.

She suddenly stiffened. “Let’s go?” she said. “Go?” She shook her head, and her voice darkened. “To where? To what?”

He hugged her. “Wherever you want to go, Rose,” he said.

She went quiet, fumbling for words. Then she said: “I want to go where you go, and be with you.”

“I want the same thing, Rose.”

“Then let’s go home,” she said.

They stood up. Delaney waited for the fine print, but there wasn’t any. Rose looked behind her. The old woman was still tossing bread crusts to the pigeons. The wino did not stir. Rose took Delaney’s hand and squeezed it, and they started walking west, to the river.

The author gratefully acknowledges use of the following previously copyrighted material:

“Brother, Can You Spare a Dime?” Lyrics by E. Y. “Yip” Harburg and Music by Jay Gorney © 1932 (Renewed) Warner Bros. Inc. Rights for the Extended Renewal Term in the United States and 50 % of the British Reversionary Territories controlled by Glocca Morra Music and Gorney Music and administered by Next Decade Entertainment, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Used by Permission of Next Decade Entertainment, Inc., and Alfred Publishing Co., Inc.

“Life Is Just a Bowl of Cherries” (From “George White’s Scandals”) Words by Lew Brown, Music by Ray Henderson © 1931 (Renewed) by DeSylva, Brown and Henderson, Inc. Rights for the Extended Renewal in the U.S. controlled by Ray Henderson Music Company and Chappell & Co. All Rights Reserved. Used by Permission of Alfred Publishing Co., Inc.

Lines quoted on pages 201–202 are from The Story of Babar, by Jean de Brunhoff, copyright © 1933 by Random House, Inc., copyright renewed 1961 by Random House, Inc.

Pete Hamill is a novelist, journalist, editor, and screenwriter. He is the author of nineteen previous books, including the bestselling novels Forever and Snow in August and the bestselling memoir A Drinking Life. He lives in New York City, where he is a Distinguished Writer-in-Residence at New York University.