Yu Hua - Brothers

Baldy Li laughed uproariously, shouting, "I'm laughing so hard my belly hurts. You didn't pinch yourselves hard enough. Give me your hands; I'll pinch them for you."

Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang extended their hands to Baldy Li, who gave them both a fierce pinch, making them cry out in pain: "Ouch!"

Yanker Yu was overjoyed and said to Popsicle Wang, "It's real!"

Popsicle Wang was even more pleased. He extended his hand to Yanker Yu, saying, "Mine is even bleeding."

With their big mouths, Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang functioned as the town's radio broadcast station. After their bumper crop, they both eagerly told everyone about how they had struck it rich. Everyone became extremely envious, and when Blacksmith Tong, Tailor Zhang, and Little Scissors Guan heard, they fell into a deep funk. Those days, Tailor Zhang and Scissors Guan met every day to complain about Blacksmith Tong, regretting that they hadn't invested in Baldy Li's new enterprise. Under their repeated retellings, the story eventually mor-phed into Blacksmith Tongs having prevented them from investing, and they became convinced that if it hadn't been for his interference, they would now be as impressive as Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang, or more so. In hindsight they both became as prescient as the legendary Three Kingdoms strategist Zhuge Liang, saying that they would have sold off their possessions and invested the resulting money in Baldy Li's scrap business if it hadn't been for Blacksmith Tong.

Tong knew those two bastards were getting together every day and cursing him, but he pretended not to notice. He sat in his shop and also regretted his missed opportunity, thinking that the first time he invested when he shouldn't have and the second time he failed to invest when he should have. Blacksmith Tong sat rubbing his fists together, thinking he must have been blind, and venting his frustration on his ten fingers.

Mama Su was also regretful. The second time Baldy Li had set off from Liu Town, he had asked her if she wanted to invest; Mama Su had thought about how she hadn't been to the temple in a long time, so had shook her head and declined. Later, every time she recalled this, she would sigh, thinking that if only she had gone to the temple to burn incense, she would definitely have invested. She told everyone she encountered, "I hadn't burned incense at the temple, and that's why things didn't work out for me."

After returning from Japan, Baldy Li realized that his scrap business had reached its peak and would have nowhere to go but down. Therefore he decided to develop some new enterprises. First he opened a clothing factory, and in memory of old times he appointed Tailor Zhang to serve as his technical deputy director. Tailor Zhang was extremely grateful. With a tape measure draped around his neck, he conscientiously oversaw the quality in the workshop, being always the first to come to work in the morning and the last to leave in the evening. After the clothing factory started to enjoy some success, Baldy Li redoubled his efforts, opening two restaurants and a bathhouse and even dabbling in real estate. When it came time, at the end of the following year, to distribute dividends again, Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang did indeed receive one hundred thousand and fifty thousand yuan, respectively. This time, however, they weren't surprised but, rather, acted as if they were expecting it. When they arrived, they each brought a travel bag and, while stuffing the bags full of bills, they appeared as relaxed as if they were filling a rice jar with rice.

Baldy Li sat in his chair watching Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang as they calmly stuffed one pile of bills after another into their travel bags. He was very satisfied with their attitude and complimented them. "Both of you have matured."

Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang laughed reservedly and calmly sat down. Baldy Li bowed his head as if lost in thought, then looked up and mused, "It is said that a tradesman walks while a mogul sits. In other words, only when your business dealings have reached the point where you can trade while staying put can they be considered as having reached their maximum potential, and only then can you be considered a major player in the business world. If you have to run around yourself, then you must be engaged in only small deals — meaning that you're a mere tradesman."

Baldy Li told Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang that his family of businesses kept on growing: He was still pursuing his scrap business and hiring more and more workers for his clothing factory, even as his two restaurants and his bathhouse were booming, and he also had several ongoing real estate projects. As a result, he spent every day running around like a chicken with its head cut off. He said that for now he was still okay, but that in the future, when he had forty or even four hundred businesses, he couldn't possibly manage even if he bought himself an F-16 fighter plane for transportation. He had thought that he had become a major player in the business world, but now he had come to realize that he was still a salesman on the go. Baldy Li then stood up and announced that he had decided to be a sitting mogul, establishing a holding company modeled on the Qin emperor's unification of China. He would bundle his various businesses into his holding company, then simply sit in his office and trade from there, using a centralized model to do business and only occasionally going to visit his various businesses in person. When Baldy Li saw Yu and Wang nodding enthusiastically, he asked them, "Do you know why the first Qin emperor unified China?"

The two looked at each other and shook their heads. "We don't know."

"It was because," Baldy Li said proudly, "that bastard wanted to get into some serious big business. That bastard didn't want to be a mere traveling salesman any longer but instead wanted to be a seated mogul."

Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang were stirred by Baldy Li's grand vision. They asked him, "After you become a mogul, what will become of us?"

"You will be shareholders and trustees in my holding company." Baldy Li pointed at himself and said, "I will be the chairman of the board of directors and the company president."

Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang looked at each other and laughed, and Popsicle Wang asked Baldy Li, "Will we have trustees’ business cards?"

"Of course." Baldy Li was feeling generous. "And if you want another position, we could consider also appointing you vice president."

"Yes, absolutely!" Yanker Yu cried out, and said to Popsicle Wang, "The more titles, the better."

"Of course." Popsicle Wang nodded, then asked Baldy Li, "Are there any other positions you could give us?"

"No." Baldy Li grew angry. "How could there be so many positions for you?"

Sensing Baldy Li's annoyance, Yanker Yu quickly nudged Popsicle Wang and chastised him, saying, "You shouldn't be too greedy."

After assuming their new titles, Yanker Yu and Popsicle Wang starting distributing their new business cards even faster than Baldy Li. They would stand in the middle of the street handing them out to everyone who walked by, as if they were handing out sales flyers.

Blacksmith Tong and Little Scissors Guan also received Yu's and Wang's business cards. After Tailor Zhang threw in his lot with Baldy Li, Little Guan found himself with no friends left and with no choice but to renew his friendly alliance with Blacksmith Tong. With Yanker Yu's and Popsicle Wang's name cards in hand, Little Guan remarked to Blacksmith Tong that those two bastards were really letting their petty successes go to their heads, to the extent that even the town's chickens, ducks, cats, and dogs must have received their cards by now.

The intelligent and capable Blacksmith Tong was the first person in Liu to follow Baldy Li's lead into entrepreneurial wealth. Seeing that the people of Liu were doing better than ever and that even peasants living in the countryside were becoming increasingly wealthy, he realized that there was no future in being a blacksmith. Therefore, he stopped making cleavers for the townspeople and sickles and hoes for the farmers, and suddenly one day his entire blacksmith shop was gone, having been transformed into a specialty store selling all sorts of cutlery.