Yu Hua - Chronicle of a Blood Merchant

“Xu Sanguan, have you heard? This morning Yile went over to He Xiaoyong’s house looking for his real dad. It was really awful! The poor kid. He Xiaoyong’s woman cursed him to his face, and then she cursed Xu Yulan, and it wasn’t pretty, what she said, let me tell you. Poor Yile. He Xiaoyong dragged him all the way down the lane and into the street.”

Xu Sanguan asked them, “Did He Xiaoyong’s woman curse at me too?”

They said, “No, you were the only one she didn’t talk about.”

Xu Sanguan said, “Then it’s none of my business.”

When afternoon arrived and Yile still hadn’t come home, Xu Yulan started to get nervous. She said to Xu Sanguan, “Everyone who’s seen Yile says he’s heading west. Everyone said the same thing. But if he’s heading west, where do you think he’ll end up going? If he gets all the way out to the countryside, he might forget the way home. He’s only eleven after all, Xu Sanguan. Can’t you please go and find him?”

Xu Sanguan said, “I’m not going. I feed him. I give him the clothes on his back. I send him to school. I’ve been very good to that little brat, and he still goes behind my back looking for his real dad. That bastard He Xiaoyong yells and screams and hits him, even drags him down the lane, and Yile still wants to look for his real dad. It’s crystal clear to me now. If a kid really isn’t your own flesh and blood, there’s no way he’ll ever become your own, no matter how well you raise him.”

Xu Yulan was forced to go off in search of Yile alone. “You may not be Yile’s real dad, but I’m his mom, and I’m going to go find him and bring him home.”

Xu Yulan was away the whole afternoon. When she finally got back, it was already dusk. As soon as she came through the door, she asked, “Is he back yet?”

Xu Sanguan said, “No, I’ve been sitting here all afternoon watching the door. Erle and Sanle have been in and out, but Yile hasn’t come back yet.”

Xu Yulan began to cry. Then she told Xu Sanguan, “I kept heading west, and I asked everyone I saw if they’d seen him. They all said they’d seen him walk by. When I got into the fields, I asked around, but no one had seen him out there. I walked in the country for a while, but there wasn’t anybody around to ask, so I didn’t know where to look.” She swung around and immediately went out again in search of Yile.

Xu Sanguan began to feel uncomfortable sitting in his chair. He rose, stood on the doorstep, and watched as night fell around him. Yile still hasn’t come home, he thought to himself. Maybe that means something’s happened to him. Xu Sanguan began to feel anxious. As he watched the sky grow darker and darker, he said to Erle and Sanle, “You two stay at home and don’t go away. If Yile comes home, you tell him that your mom and I are out looking for him.”

Xu Sanguan shut the front door and moved off toward the west side of town. But before he had gone more than a few steps, he heard sobs somewhere by his feet. When he bent over to look, he saw Yile crouching next to a neighboring doorstep. Yile trembled as he gazed up at Xu Sanguan.

Xu Sanguan quickly stooped down beside him. “Yile, it’s you, isn’t it?” When he was sure that it was indeed Yile, he shouted, “Goddamnit, you scared your mom half to death, and you scared the hell out of me too, but you’re just fine, aren’t you? You were just sitting next door the whole time we were worrying.”

Yile said, “Dad, I’m hungry. I’m so hungry I’m weak.”

Xu Sanguan said, “It’s your own damn fault. Even if you starved to death, it would still be your own fault. No one made you run away from home. And I thought you said you weren’t coming back.”

Yile lifted one hand to smear away his tears. As he rubbed his eyes, he said, “I didn’t want to come back. You wouldn’t take me as your real son, so I went to find He Xiaoyong. He Xiaoyong wouldn’t take me either. I didn’t want to come back—”

Xu Sanguan cut him off in midsentence. “So what are you doing here? Go on. It’s not too late. Get out of here. It would be better if you never came back.”

Yile cried even harder. “I’m hungry, I’m sleepy, I want something to eat, I want to go to sleep. And even if you won’t have me as your real son, I thought you loved me more than He Xiaoyong. . so I came back.”

Yile stuck out one hand, gripped the wall, and pulled himself to a standing position. Then, still holding on to the wall, he began to walk down the lane toward the west.

“Stop right there, you little brat. Where do you think you’re going?”

Yile stopped walking. Shoulders bent and head to the ground, he began to cry so violently that his body shook with his sobs.

Xu Sanguan knelt down by his side. “Climb onto my back.”

Yile clambered onto Xu Sanguan’s back, and Xu Sanguan carried him eastward down the lane. They passed by their own door, walked to the end of the lane, then walked down another lane until they reached the main street. They walked down the street until they had crossed the river that ran through town.

As they walked, Xu Sanguan kept up an incessant stream of curses directed at Yile. “You little brat. You little bastard. You little jerk. You’re gonna drive me to my grave one of these days, you make me so mad. If you want to run away, fine. Go ahead. Run away. Do you have to tell everyone in town about it too? The whole damn town thinks I abuse you now. They must think that your stepdad beats you up every day, curses you every day. I’ve taken care of you for eleven years now, and all I am is your stepdad. That bastard He Xiaoyong hasn’t spent one fen on your behalf, and he’s your real dad. So who’s the unlucky one? And I sure as hell don’t want to be your dad in my next life either. No way. Next time around, I want you to try being my stepdad. You just wait. I’ll drive you crazy. I’ll make you so mad, you won’t know whether you want to live or die.”

Yile caught sight of the gleaming lights of the Victory Restaurant. Timidly, he asked Xu Sanguan, “Dad, are you taking me to eat noodles?”

Xu Sanguan stopped cursing Yile. His voice suddenly grew gentle. “That’s right.”

One day two years later, as He Xiaoyong was walking down the street, he was hit by a truck from Shanghai. He was thrown so hard against a neighboring house that the closed front door was knocked open by the impact, and he came to a stop only on the floor inside.

When the news that He Xiaoyong had been hit by a truck spread through town, Xu Sanguan gloated for a day. It was a hot summer night, and Xu Sanguan, clad in shorts and a sleeveless T-shirt, made the rounds of his neighbors’ houses, saying as he went, “This is what is meant by karma. You get what you deserve. You do something bad and try to pretend that you didn’t do it, but Old Man Heaven always knows exactly what’s going on. And if Old Man Heaven wants to punish you for what you’ve done, don’t think you’ll get away. You might be hit by a truck. You could be walking down the street minding your own business one day when a roof tile falls on your head. Or say you’re crossing the bridge: the bridge might suddenly collapse into the water. Old Man Heaven will find a way. Look at me, for instance. I’m strong, I’m energetic, and my color is good. I’ve lived the life of a poor man and I’ve been through hard times, but I’m healthy. And health is the most important thing of all. Looks like Old Man Heaven’s rewarding me for being good.”

As he spoke, he flexed his arms and legs to show his neighbors his muscles. Then he continued.

“And sure, I’ve been a cuckold for thirteen years, but look at Yile. He and I are very close, even closer than Erle and Sanle. If there’s something good to eat, he always asks me, ‘Dad, do you want some?’ When those brats Erle and Sanle get something good to eat, they never offer me any. You know why Yile is so good to me? It’s because Old Man Heaven’s rewarding me for being good.”