Sherman Alexie - Reservation Blues

“What the hell you doing?” the Chief asked.

With his eyes still closed, Samuel drove to the basket, around his defenders, and pulled up for a short jumper. The ball rotated beautifully. Years later, Lester still swore that ball stopped in midair, just spun there like it was on a stick, like the ball wanted to make sure everyone noticed its beauty.

“That shot was vain,” Lester said.

“That shot was the best story I ever told,” Samuel said.

TRIBAL COPS—9

SAMUEL & LESTER—8

The man-who-was-probably-Lakota stood in front of the Trading Post every morning. He studied his watch, waited for the top of the hour, and then started his ceremony at the same exact time every morning.

“The end of the world is near!” he chanted. “The end of the world is near!”

“Jeez,” Thomas said as he heard the chant. “It can’t be six already. We stayed up all night.”

Victor and Junior stumbled into the room.

“Shit,” Victor said. “Does that crazy Lakota have to do that every morning?”

“Enit?” Junior said. “He must think he’s one of those Plains Indian roosters.”

“Jeez,” Victor said and looked at Samuel. “How’s your old man?”

“He’s all right.”

“I’m hungry,” Junior said.

“There’s some applesauce in the fridge.”

“Commodity applesauce or real applesauce?”

“Commodity.”

“Shit, we’ll eat it anyway.”

“Ya-hey,” Victor said. “Maybe we should stick an apple in Samuel’s mouth and roast him up.”

Checkers rose in anger and slapped Victor.

“What the fuck’s wrong with you?” Victor asked as he grabbed her wrists.

“That ain’t funny. That ain’t funny.”

Victor held Checkers until she stopped struggling. He let her go, and Checkers slapped him again. She wailed on Victor. The rest of Coyote Springs remained silent, too sleepy and stunned to move. Checkers slapped and kicked the Indian man in front of her. That Indian man, those Indian men.

“Stop it!” Chess shouted as she came back to life. She tried to separate Checkers and Victor, but her sister pushed her away. Checkers balled her hands into fists and started to punch Victor.

“That’s it,” Victor said, picked Checkers up, and threw her down. Checkers bounced back up and threw a few more wild punches.

Thomas jumped Victor then, and the two wrestled around the room, bumped into walls and the other band members. Checkers crawled under the kitchen table for cover, while Samuel Builds-the-Fire slept on. Chess screamed at Thomas and Victor.

“Knock this shit off!”

Victor pulled away from Thomas. They stood face to face like boxers before a bout. Breathing hard, they stared each other down.

“You assholes,” Chess said. “Quit this macho bullshit.”

“Ya-hey,” Junior said. “I’ve got applesauce.”

Junior stepped between Thomas and Victor.

“I’ve got enough spoons for all of us, too.”

“I don’t want any,” Thomas said and walked out the door. Chess followed him. Victor took the applesauce and spoons from Junior. Checkers stayed beneath the table, while Samuel sat up, looked around, then fell back to sleep.

“Hey,” Chess said as she caught up to Thomas outside. “What the hell you think you’re doing? You think you’re some kind of tough guy, enit?”

“He can’t do that to people no more,” Thomas said. “I won’t let him. I don’t give a shit what that guitar said. I don’t care.

“Well, call it off,” Chess said. “Let’s kick them out of the band. We don’t need them. We can be a trio. Me, you, and Checkers. We’ll get a new name. We’ll move to a new place. Get the hell away from this reservation. Any reservation.”

The horses screamed.

“What do you think?” Thomas asked. “Should we do that?”

“Yeah, we should.”

Victor swallowed the last bite of applesauce just as Thomas and Chess returned to the house. Junior had crawled beneath the table with Checkers. She pushed and kicked at him, but he still sat under there. He wanted some applesauce.

“I think she’s hurt,” Junior said to Chess, who crawled beneath the table, too.

“Is she okay?” Thomas asked.

“My ass hurts,” Checkers said. She shook as Chess held her.

“She’s completely fucking nuts is what she is,” Victor said.

“Listen,” Thomas said, and the rest of Coyote Springs looked at him. He wanted to tell them about the new plan to kick Junior and Victor out of the band, but he heard a knock on the door.

“Who the hell is that?” Victor asked.

Thomas opened the door to nothing. He looked around. Nobody. He was about to shut the door when he heard a voice.

“Hey,” the voice whispered from inside a bush on the front lawn. “You’re Builds-the-Fire, right?”

“Yeah.”

“The lead singer, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay,” the voice said. “I have a letter for you.”

The Federal Express guy jumped out of the bush and handed the letter to Thomas. Then he saluted him, jumped off the porch, and ran for his truck. Thomas watched the FedEx truck kick up dust and smoke as it peeled out of the driveway.

“What was that?” Chess asked.

“This,” Thomas said and opened the letter. He read it slowly.

“Well,” Chess said, “what is it?”

“We got an offer to play at this place in Seattle. The Backboard. I guess they saw us play in Ellensburg. They’ll pay us a thousand dollars.”

“No shit!” Victor yelled and started to dance with Junior. They tangoed up and down the floor. Junior picked up a stray feather and stuck it in his teeth.

“It’s our chance,” Thomas said.

“Chance for what?” Chess asked.

“The money. We need the money. Don’t we?”

Chess knew that Coyote Springs needed the money. She needed the money. The forest fire season was nearly over. Nobody hired Flathead Indians on the Spokane Indian Reservation. Two hundred dollars a head. Checkers and Chess would have four hundred together. With Thomas and his share, they would have enough money to dump Victor and Junior.

“What do you think?” Chess asked her sister.

“I ain’t going anywhere with that asshole,” Checkers said. “Besides, how the hell do these people know who we are? They couldn’t have seen us in Ellensburg. That was just last night. I don’t trust them. I don’t trust any of this.”

“We don’t need you,” Victor said. “You can’t sing anyway.

Checkers, Chess, and Junior climbed out from under the table. Victor stepped behind Thomas because Checkers knew how to punch.

“I think we all need to sleep on this,” Chess said. “Jeez, Checkers and I ain’t got any sleep at all. You neither, Thomas.”

“We ain’t got time to sleep on it,” Thomas said. “They want us to be there tomorrow night for sound check.”

“Are you serious?” Serious enough

“Jeez,” Chess asked her sister again, “what do you want to do?”

“I told you. I ain’t going anywhere with that caveman.”

“I’m going,” Victor said.

“Me, too,” Junior said.

“This ain’t enough time to decide anything,” Chess said. “That’s not fair. How could they do that to us?”

“Strangers ask us to sing for them, and they’ll pay us a thousand bucks,” Victor said. “And you think they’re being assholes. We should be grateful.”

“Will you shut up? I’m trying to think.”

“I’m going,” Thomas said. “I have to go.”

Victor whooped. Junior hugged Thomas.

“Checkers,” Chess said, “are you sure you don’t want to go?”

“I’m sure.”

“Okay, she’s not going. But she still gets her share of the money.”