x Tx - Normally Special

Which, it most definitely is not.

Don’t worry, I will never find you. Do not worry. You are safe.

Unless you do not want to be safe.

Do you long to feel my approach? I dare not believe this. The thought would rip me in two. Do you look for me at the curb? Do you think of dark roads bringing me closer? Do you want my teeth to tear into you? Do you want me to leave your blood in pools on the floor? Do you want to see me sliding in it, struggling? My hands on you. Will you not fight? Maybe you want to feel my offensive. Everything I brought with me, the journey hard on my form. All for you. You would endure for this. You would let me hurt you in the best way, even if you died, even if I killed you seven times within the dying you would know my depth of love for you, yes love, I said it, because maybe you want, this once, to die from the hands of a woman who would crawl so far to kill you. This death would be the marriage and honeymoon and a becoming you will never have unless for me. I would not disappoint you, if you made this choice. In my killing you would be given as much pain as you wanted and I would take so much from you again and again as I made my way through your skin millimeter by millimeter, tasting it at every moment before letting it make its way inside of me. You’d be smiling, trust me. And I’d drink every tear you give me. Diamonds in my throat. You would love this. If you were not afraid. If you let me.

But you and I both know I wouldn’t.

You are safe.

Do not worry.

I will never find you.

But I could.

If I really wanted to.

xTx is a writer living in Southern California. She has been published online in places such as PANK, Monkeybicycle, Smokelong Quarterly, Wigleaf, elimae and >kill author . Her free e-book entitled, Nobody Trusts a Black Magician is available at nonpress. Her first chapbook, He is Talking to the Fat Lady is digitally available from Safety Third Enterprises. She says nothing at www.notimetosayit.com.

To all of my friends, readers and supporters for making me feel what I am doing is not a waste of time, thank you for every bit of encouragement and every kind word you’ve ever given me. I wish you knew just how much it means to me.

And a special thank you to my editor, publisher and friend, Roxane Gay without whom this book would not be possible. You know.