Theodore Odrach - Wave of Terror

He lowered his voice and the words trembled on his lips. “Lonia won’t come today, or tomorrow or the day after. He’s not coming home at all. Ever.”

“Father, stop talking like that! You’re frightening me. Why don’t you go and get Mother? It’s late and she should have been back a long time ago. I hope she hasn’t had any trouble. Go and bring her home, please.”

Valentyn remained unmoving, staring at the floor. Finally he said, “I suppose you’re right. I suppose I should go and get her. She probably nodded off on one of the benches.”

As he took his hat and cane and made for the door, Kulik also got ready to leave, but Marusia was quick to take his arm. Looking a little piqued, she said, “Ivan, please don’t go. Stay and wait for Mother. As a matter of fact, just the other day she was asking about you, and she even said that the two of you had some kind of business to settle. It’s true, she never really liked you very much, but now somehow she’s warmed up to you. Isn’t that the truth, Father?”

“Yes, yes.” Valentyn looked at her vaguely. “I suppose it’s true if you say so, but to be honest, I don’t know anything about it. Well, in any case, it’s a good thing she’s asked for you, because then I’ll still get to see you when I come back.”

Descending the porch stairs, Valentyn pulled his pipe out of his pocket and lit it. He looked up at the sky and muttered, “Oh Lord, please don’t let her be in one of her moods.”

Marusia and Kulik sat in the living room in awkward silence for a moment. Then she moved closer to him, her arm touched his. Her face was a little flushed. She smiled and said with a tremor in her voice, “At last we find ourselves alone and without witnesses.”

Looking uncertainly into her green eyes, his heart melted like hot wax. He knew she wanted something from him, and he wasn’t sure he could help her. She broke into sobs. “Ivan, I need your help. Please, don’t refuse me.”

Kulik wanted to hold her in his arms and comfort her, but he said hesitantly, “I don’t know that I can be of any use to you. What do you want me to do?”

She rushed out of the room, to return a few minutes later holding a small wooden box. Her voice breaking, she said, “Lonia, my brother Lonia … Oh, I don’t know what to make of anything anymore. Here, take a look at these letters. The box is full of them. Each and every one of them is signed ‘your loving brother’. But I don’t believe he wrote them. Something’s happened to him, something terrible, I can feel it with all my heart. Mother can’t bring herself to accept the truth, she’s made herself believe they’re from him, but I know they’re not. This isn’t even his handwriting.”

Kulik took the box from her and examined the letters. Some were written in pencil and hard to read, others were in bold blue ink. Most were two to three weeks old, with an address from a street in Lvov. Their style was the same — mechanical, detached, even strained. They didn’t read like letters from a young man to his loving family.

Marusia looked fearfully at Kulik. “What’s your impression of them?”

Looking through them again, he said at last, “Well, I’m not really sure. In most of the letters he says he’s fine and he’s spending most of his time studying. In this last one here, he promises to come home to Pinsk for the summer holidays. The second half of June is not that far off. Why don’t you just wait and see what happens?”

The girl flew at him in a frenzy. “I asked for your impression , not your interpretation !”

Kulik put the letters back in the box. “In all honesty, Marusia, I don’t know what to say about all this. The only thing that is clear to me is that someone has been tampering with these letters.”

She shrank back. “Oh, my God! It was Sobakin! I should have known. The entire time he’s been promising to bring Lonia home what he’s really been doing is stringing me along. I know it now! He doesn’t care if my brother lives or dies.”

“What do you want me to do? Do you want me to go to Lvov?”

Marusia’s face brightened and she clutched his arm. “Would you, please? I have no one else to turn to.”

When he met her desperate gaze, he blurted out the first thing that came to his mind. “You know I’d like to help you, but you have to realize this is a very difficult matter…. Well, I suppose I could go … but I definitely couldn’t go before the summer holidays because that would raise suspicion at the school. I wouldn’t only lose my position — I’d most likely be arrested by the NKVD and thrown into …”

Suddenly his throat ran dry and he could not go on. What was he saying? He was embroiling himself in a situation where he could easily be picked up by the secret police and convicted on some trumped-up charge. And her relationship with Sobakin certainly wouldn’t help his case. He decided at that moment that it would be best for him to leave the Bohdanovich house immediately, and not involve himself any further in their affairs.

With all these thoughts rushing at him at once, he looked up and met Marusia’s eyes, welling with tears. He felt he had to make her feel better. He said thoughtfully, “There’s one other possibility, but you must promise to keep it secret. Agreed? I have a friend who lives in Lvov. He’s a colleague of mine from my university days. I’ll write him today and ask him to make some inquiries. I’m sure he won’t refuse.”

Her face took on a look of almost stunning gratitude. She said softly, “You’re a decent man, Ivan. I was so wrong about you. You’re different from what I thought.”

She had become completely transfigured by her love for her brother. “You’re different, too,” he said. “You’ve changed in so many ways. You’re actually even friendly to me …” He broke off and then added, “Yet, at the same time you’re still …”

“I’m still … what? Why don’t you finish?”

“Well, you’re still trying to be something you’re not. Why do you deny who you really are, especially with everything going on around you? You can’t block it from your mind forever. You’re a strange one, Marusia, and I can’t quite figure you out. In spite of all that’s happening, you still insist on speaking Russian. And your Russian isn’t as good as you think it is and it’s filled with all kinds of Ukrainian intonations. The only one you’re fooling is yourself.”

Marusia was about to give him an angry answer, but controlled herself to keep the peace between them.

They fell silent, and as the sun set, the room darkened. Marusia got up to switch on a small lamp by the sofa. She looked at Kulik and said with great effort, “Ivan, I meant to ask you, have you seen Seryoza lately? How’s he doing? Is he all right? He hasn’t come around for the longest time.”

Not knowing what to say, Kulik blurted, “He’s fine. He was quite sick for a while, but now he’s better.”

“Sick?” Marusia looked incredulously at him. “What do you mean, sick? Seryoza’s never been sick a day in his life. What was wrong with him?”

“I think he had the flu.”

“The flu? Why are you lying to me? And I thought you were actually starting to be straight with me. I was even coming to trust you.”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, don’t pretend with me. Seryoza was never sick with the flu, and you very well know it. No, he was taken to the Zovty Prison and beaten! I know that just as well as you. Some people told me. Why can’t you trust me, why can’t you be open with me?”

Getting up from the sofa, Kulik said calmly, “For our own sakes, Marusia, I think it’s best we drop the subject right now. Things will only get too personal and we’ll end up quarrelling and saying things we might regret. No? You really want me to go ahead? All right then, I’ll tell you. I have to be very careful with what I say to you because your thoughts aren’t always clear, you’re impressionable and confused, and you close your eyes to the truth.” Then he added, “You’re very charming, and I believe you’re struggling to find your way out, but I’m not sure you ever will. So I think you can understand why I can’t trust you, at least not yet.”