Wu Cheng-en - Journey to the West (vol. 1)

“Master,” said pig, “this looks like a nobleman or a minister's house. There's nobody at the gates, so I suppose they're all inside warming themselves up by the fire. Sit down and let me take a look.”

“Do be careful,” said the Tang Priest. “Don't go charging into their house.”

“I know,” said the idiot. “I'm a lot better mannered now I'm a Buddhist. I'm not a village yokel any more.”

The idiot tucked his rake in his belt, straightened his black brocade tunic, and went in through the gate in a very affected way. He saw a large hall with high, curtained windows that was completely quiet and deserted. There were no tables, chairs or other furniture. When he went round the screen and further into the house he found himself in a passageway at the end of which stood a multi-storied building with upstairs windows half open through which yellow damask bed-curtains could be glimpsed. “I suppose they're still in bed because it's so cold,” thought Pig, whereupon he marched up the stairs without worrying about the propriety of invading the private quarters of the house. When the idiot lifted the curtain and looked inside he almost collapsed with shock: on the ivory bed inside the curtains was a pile of gleaming white bones, with a skull the size of a bushel measure and thighbones some four or five feet long.

When the idiot calmed himself the tears poured down his cheeks as he nodded to the skeletons and said with a sigh, “I wonder:

For what great dynasty you once were a marshal

In what country's service did you hold high command?

Then you were a hero fighting for mastery,

But now you are only a pile of old bones.

Where are the widow and child making offerings?

Do no soldiers burn incense to honour your memory?

The sight is enough to make one sigh deeply:

Alas for the man who once was a conqueror.”

As pig was sighing with grief there was a flicker of fire behind the curtain, “I suppose there must be attendants at the back to offer him incense,” the idiot thought. When he rushed round the bed-curtain to look he saw that it was the daylight shining through the windows, beside which stood a coloured lacquer table. On it were thrown some padded clothes in brocade and embroidery. When the idiot picked them up to look at them he saw that they were three quilted brocade waistcoats. Not worrying about whether it was right to do so the idiot took them downstairs and went out through the main hall and the gates.

“Master,” he shouted, “there's no sign of life here-it's a house of the dead. I went inside and went upstairs, where I found a pile of bones behind a yellow bed-curtain. On one side of the upper floor were three quilted brocade waistcoats, look-I've brought them back with me. We're really in luck as they're just what we need now that the weather has turned cold. Take your habit off, Master, and put one of these on underneath. You'll be a lot more comfortable: it'll keep the cold out.”

“No,” said Sanzang, “it's forbidden. The law says, 'Taking, whether openly or in secret, is always theft.' If anyone found out, came after us and handed us over to the authorities we would definitely be found guilty of theft. You had better take them back in and put them where you found them. We shall just sit here for a while to shelter from the wind and carry on along our way as soon as Wukong is back. Monks should not be looking out for easy pickings like that.”

“But there's nobody around who could know,” said Pig, “not even a chicken or a dog. The only people who know are ourselves. Who's going to sue us? There's no evidence. It's just the same as if we'd picked it up. Taking or stealing just doesn't come into it.”

“Nonsense,” said the Tang Priest. “Even if nobody else knew about it Heaven cannot be fooled. As the Lord of Origin teaches us, 'Do no evil in a dark house: the eyes of the gods are like lightning.' Take it back at once and stop hankering after what you have no right to.”

The idiot was having none of this. “Master,” he said to the Tang Priest with a grin, “I've worn several waistcoats in my life, but never have I seen quilted brocade ones like this before. Even if you don't want to wear one, please let me just try one on to warm my back up. When Monkey comes back I'll take it off and we can be on our way again.”

“In that cast,” said Friar Sand, “I'd like to try one too.” The two of them took off their outer tunics and put the waistcoats on instead. As soon as they had tightened the belts they collapsed, unable to stay on their feet. The waistcoats were even worse than bonds. In an instant both of them had their hands tied together behind their backs. Sanzang stamped his foot in despair and indignation and rushed forward to untie them, but to no avail. The three of them set up endless yells that soon disturbed a demon king.

Now these buildings had indeed been created by the magic of an evil spirit who spent all his life lying in wait there to catch people. Hearing the howls of anger as he sat in his cave he rushed out to find that he had several victims tied up. The monster called for his little demons to go there with him as he made all the enchanted buildings vanish. They returned to the cave holding the Tang Priest, leading the horse, and dragging Pig and Friar Sand. The old demon took his seat on his throne while the little devils pushed Sanzang to the foot of the steps and forced him to kneel on the floor.

“Where are you from, monk,” the demon asked, “and how can you have the effrontery to steal my clothes in broad daylight?”

“I have been sent to fetch the scriptures from the Western Heaven by the emperor of Great Tang in the East,” replied Sanzang. “As I was hungry I sent my senior disciple to beg for food. He has not come back yet, and it was because I ignored his good advice that I blundered into your immortal hall to shelter from the wind, never imagining that my disciples would be so grasping as to steal your clothes. As I have no such wicked thoughts I told them to take the clothes straight back, but they paid no attention and insisted on putting them on to warm their backs. Never did I imagine that we would fall into Your Majesty's trap and be captured. I beg you in your mercy to spare our lives so that we can fetch the scriptures. We will be eternally indebted to Your Majesty and your praises will be sung for ever after we return to the East.”

“But I'm always hearing people say that if you eat the flesh of the Tang Priest, white hair can be turned black, and teeth that have fallen out will grow again,” said the demon with a grin. “You've come along today without even having been asked, and now you expect me to spare you! What's your senior disciple called, and where has he gone begging?”

This question started Pig bragging: “My elder brother is Sun Wukong, the Great Sage Equaling Heaven who made havoc in Heaven five hundred years ago.”

This news shocked the demon speechless. “I've long heard of that damned ape's enormous powers,” he thought, “and now I'm meeting him when I least expected to. Little ones,” he ordered, “tie the Tang Priest up, take my precious coats off the other two, and fetch a couple of ropes to bind them. Take them to the back, and when I've caught the senior disciple we can scrub them all clean, put them in the steamer and cook them.” The little demons acknowledged his orders then bound the three of them together and carried them to the back. They tethered the white horse by the trough, took the luggage indoors, and sharpened their weapons ready to capture Monkey.

Monkey, meanwhile, who had filled his begging bowl with rice in the farmhouse to the South, rode his cloud back and landed it on a stretch of level ground on the mountainside to find the Tang Priest gone he knew not where. The circle he had drawn with his cudgel was still there, but travelers and horse had disappeared. When he looked towards where the buildings had been they had vanished too: all that could be seen were mountains and grotesquely shaped rocks.