Виктория Холт - The Captive

Always devoted to your interests, Lucas

I remembered my interview with Lady Perrivale who had said I might be free to take time off when I wanted to. So I wrote a hasty note telling Lucas that I would meet him at The Sailor King the following afternoon at half past two.

Then I took the letters to my room to read them. They were both as I expected. My father’s was rather stilted. He could not understand why I had thought it necessary to take a post. If I had wanted some work he could have found something congenial for me, perhaps at the Museum.

He hoped that I would soon be home and we could talk about what I wanted to do.

I could not imagine myself explaining to my father. I was sorry for him. I guessed Aunt Maud had urged him to write in a disapproving manner.

There was no doubt of her feelings.

My dear Rosetta, How could you ? A governess! What are you thinking of? I know some poor females are forced into such a position but such is not the case with you. If you take my advice you will give up this nonsense without more ado. Do so quickly. People need never know . or if it came out it would be called a mad prank. Of course, the ideal thing would be a London season for you, but you know that is out of the question. But you are the daughter of a professor, a highly respected man in academic circles. You would have had your chances . but a governess! It went on in this strain for several pages through which I lightly skimmed. The reaction was so much what I had expected that it left me unmoved.

I was far more interested in my coming meeting with Lucas.

I told Kate the following afternoon that I was meeting a friend.

“Can I come?”

“Oh no.”

Why not? “

“Because you are not invited.”

“What shall I do while you are gone?”

“You’ll amuse yourself.”

“But I want to come.”

“Not this time?”

“Next time?”

“The future’s not ours to see.”

“You are the most maddening governess.”

“Then I match my pupil.”

She laughed. We had indeed come a long way in the short time I had been here. There was a rapport between us which I would not have dreamed was possible.

She was resigned though disgruntled. She referred once to my desertion.

“I’ve shown you things,” she grumbled.

“I showed you Gramps and the grave.”

“Both suggested by you. I did not ask. Besides, people have a private side to their lives.”

“And this one you’re meeting is in your private life?”

“As you have never met him , .. yes.”

“I will,” she said threateningly.

“You may … perhaps ..” one day. “

She would have liked to make a scene but she dared not. I knew that her life had changed since I had come and it was due to me. She looked upon me, in a way, as her protegee. She enjoyed being with me, which was why she was making such a fuss because I was leaving for a few hours; but there was a real fear, which I had managed to inst il in her, that I might leave altogether; and that’re strained her.

In my room that night I looked over the last days and thought how far I had come, though not, alas, in my main project. That had remained more or less static but in my new life as governess to Kate Blanchard I had progressed amazingly. True, I had met people who had been close to the scene of the murder, and that gave me hopes of coming on some discovery. I needed time to talk to them, to get to know them, and I must do this in a natural manner . so that they did not guess my real motive.

I wished I could find out something about Mirabel’s first husband, Mr. Blanchard. What could he have been like? When had he died? How long was it after that when she came down to Cornwall with her father and her daughter? They could not have been very well off, for the cottage was quite a humble dwelling . at least in comparison with Perrivale Court and the Dower House.

Idle curiosity, perhaps. But not entirely. Mirabel was one of the chief actors in the drama, and it would be advantageous to know as much of her as possible.

Then I was thinking of Lucas, remembering with a certain tenderness his proposal. I felt a great longing to tell him why I was at Perrivale and I knew that when I was with him that longing would be intensified.

I sat at my window looking at those across the courtyard. I was trying to persuade myself that Lucas would be a help to me. What a relief it would be to share this with him. He cared for me . next to himself.

I smiled, remembering his words.

If I made him swear not to betray Simon . was it possible?

I must not yet, I told myself. It was not my secret. Simon had told me because it had seemed possible that we might never get off the island and he had felt it necessary to confide in someone. Besides, there was a special relationship between us. I had been aware of that as he had.

Suddenly my eyes were caught by a light in one of the windows opposite. It was faint . from a candle, I imagined. It flickered and then was gone.

I was startled. I was remembering a conversation I had had with Kate some days ago. We had been standing at my window and we had looked out across the courtyard.

“Whose rooms are those over there?” I had asked.

The one next to the top floor, do you mean? Do you see something special there? “

“No. Should I?”

“I wondered if you’d seen Stepper’s father’s ghost.”

“Your preoccupation with ghosts is becoming quite a mania.”

“It’s like that in big houses, especially when there’s been a murder.

That’s Stepper’s father’s bedroom over there. Nobody goes in there much now. “

“Why not?”

“Well, because he died there. My mother says you have to show respect.”

“Respect?”

“Well, he died there.”

“Someone must go in to clean it.”

“I expect so. Anyway, no one goes there … except Stepper’s mother’s up there with Maria. They stay there most of the time.”

“Maria?”

“Her maid. I reckon it’s haunted. Sir Edward died there.”

I thought it was just another instance of Kate’s preoccupation and forgot about it. Yet when I saw the light a faint shiver ran down my spine.

I laughed at myself. Kate was affecting me with her obsession.

As she would have said, it was because there had been a murder connected with the house.

She was right. It was because of that murder that I was here.

Lucas was in The Sailor King waiting for me, and I felt extraordinarily happy to see him.

He stood up and took both my hands in his. We looked searchingly at each other for a few seconds, then he kissed my cheek.

“Governessing suits you,” he said.

“Well, sit down. How is it going?

I’ve ordered cider. It’s too early for tea, don’t you think? “

I agreed.

“So they allow you a horse to ride, do they?”

I nodded.

“They are most gracious.”

“And the pupil?”

“I’m getting her tamed.”

“You do look proud of yourself.”

“Lucas, how are they at the Manor? The children … ?”

“Very hurt by your desertion.”

“Oh, not really.”

“Yes, really. They ask for you twenty times a day. When is she coming back? I’m going to ask the same question.”

“Not just yet, Lucas.”

“What satisfaction do you get out of it?”

“I can’t explain, Lucas. I wish I could.”

I could feel confession trembling on my lips. But it is not your secret, I kept reminding myself.

“A governess! It’s the last thing …”

“I have had letters from home.”

“Aunt Maud?”

I nodded.

“And my father.”

“Good old Aunt Maud!”

“Lucas … please understand.”

“I’m trying to.”