Виктория Холт - The Captive

“And leave you behind!”

“Yes,” he said shortly.

“Now I will take you to the Embassy. Oh, Rosetta, don’t look like that. It’s the best for you. That is what I want. It’s a great opportunity … such as comes once in a lifetime.

You must not fail to take it. You are emotionally overwrought. You do not understand your true feelings. Later you will be able to assess them. Now you must go. I ask it. I have to fend for myself. That will be difficult enough. But I shall manage . alone. “

“You mean I would be a burden.”

He hesitated and then looked at me steadily.

“Yes,” he said.

I knew then that I had to go.

“It is best for you, Rosetta,” he went on gently.

“I shall never forget you. One day perhaps …”

I did not speak. I thought: I shall never be happy again. We have been through too much . together.

He took both my hands in his and held me against him for a few moments.

Then, together, we left the Memorial Church and made our way to the gates of the Embassy.

In a few days I had passed out of the fantastic unreal world into normality. I was amazed by the manner in which I had been received by the Embassy. It almost made me feel that for a girl to be shipwrecked and sold into a harem was not such an unusual occurrence as I had imagined it to be.

Piracy must have been abolished almost a century ago, but there were still some who continued to ply their evil trade on the high seas, and potentates still maintained their seraglios behind high walls guarded by eunuchs, as they had in days gone by. Certain acts might not be performed openly, but they still existed.

The Embassy was a small enclave-a little bit of England in a foreign land, and from the moment I entered its portals I felt that I had come home.

I was soon divested of my foreign garments and conventional clothes were found for me. I was questioned and I gave my account of what had happened. It was well known that the Atlantic Star had foundered and there had been few survivors. Immediate contact would be made with London. I told my story of our escape with the help of one of the crew hands, how we had reached the island, where we had been picked up by corsairs who had sold us into slavery. I knew that I must say nothing about Simon’s having escaped with me. My story was immediately accepted.

I was to stay in the Embassy for a while. I must try to relax, I was told, and to remember that I was now safe. I saw a doctor, an elderly Englishman, who was very kind and gentle. He asked me a few questions. I told him how I had been befriended and had been unmolested all the time I had been there. That seemed to give him great relief. He said I appeared to be in good health but I must take care. Such an ordeal as I had suffered could have had an effect on me which might not at first be discernible. If I wished to talk of it I was to do so; but if not, my wishes would be respected.

I was thinking a great deal about Simon, for naturally I could not get him out of my mind. This made me preoccupied and those about me probably thought I was brooding on the horror from which I had escaped.

Moreover, I could not help wondering what was happening at the seraglio and what Rani’s reaction had been when she had discovered that I had gone instead of Fatima. And what would have happened when Simon’s departure had been discovered? Fortunately the Chief Eunuch had been involved and he would doubtless see that there was as little fuss as possible. Rani would be very angry, I was sure. But even she had to bow to the Chief Eunuch.

I wondered about Nicole. Her debt was handsomely paid and I fervently hoped that she would be rewarded for all she had done for me and keep herself and Samir in high favour with the Pasha.

But I should never know. They had passed out of my life as suddenly as they had come into it.

Then I would be overcome by the wonder of freedom. I should soon be home. I should live the life of a normal English girl. I must never cease to be thankful that I had come safely through that ordeal except that, on achieving freedom, I had lost Simon.

Those days I spent in the Embassy seem vague to me now. I would wake in the morning for a few seconds believing I was on my divan. The terrible apprehension would come flooding back.

Will it be today that the summons will come? I had not realized until this time what a strain I had lived through.

Then I would remember where I was and a feeling of relief would sweep over me . until I thought of Simon. How was he faring in that strange city? Had he been able to find a ship on which he could work his way to Australia? I supposed it was one of the best places he could go to in the circumstances. How could he survive? He was young and strong as well as resourceful. He would find a way. And one day when he was able to prove his innocence he would come home. Perhaps I should see him again and we could resume our friendship from where it had been cut off. He had hinted that he loved me. Did he mean in a special way or was it just that affection which naturally grows up between two people who had endured what we had together?

Free to go home, back to the house in Bloomsbury. Or was the house still ours? What had happened to my parents? Were Mr. Dolland, Mrs. Harlow, Meg and Emily still in the kitchen? How could they be if my parents were not there? I had often pictured the scene, Mr. Dolland at the end of the table, his spectacles pushed up on to his forehead, telling them about the shipwreck. But if my parents had not returned, what would have happened to my friends in the kitchen?

Sometimes life here seemed as uncertain as it had within the walls of the seraglio.

The Ambassador asked me to go and see him one day, which I did. He was tall, dignified with a ceremonial manner. He was very kind and gentle to me, as was everyone at the Embassy.

He said: “I have news. Some good … some bad. The good news is that your father survived the shipwreck. He is at his home now in Bloomsbury. The bad news is that

your mother was lost at sea. Your father has been informed of your safety and looks forward to your homecoming. Mr. and Mrs. Deardon are going home in a few days when their leave falls due. It seems a good idea and would be most convenient-if you travelled with them.”

I was only half listening. My mother dead! I tried hard to remember her but could only think of her absentminded smile when her eyes alighted on me.

“Ah … the child …” and “This is our daughter, Rosetta. You will find her somewhat untutored, I fear.” I could remember Felicity on that occasion far more distinctly. And now my mother was dead. That cruel ocean had claimed her. I had always thought of her and my father together and I wondered what he was like without her.

Mrs. Deardon came to me. She was a plump, comfortably cosy woman who talked continually, which I often found a relief as I had no wish to say much myself.

“My dear,” she cried.

“What an ordeal you have suffered. All you have been through! Never mind. Jack and I will look after you. We shall take ship from Constantinople to Marseilles and then travel through France to Calais. What a journey! I always dread it. But there it is.

Needs must. But you do know that every minute you are getting nearer home. “

She was the sort of woman who gives you a summary of her life in five minutes or so. I learned that Jack had always been in the Service, that he and she had gone to school together, married when they were both twenty, had two children, Jack Junior who was now in the Foreign Office, and Martin who was still at university. He would assuredly go into one of the Services. It was a family tradition.

I could see that she was going to relieve me of making conversation and perhaps saying something I might regret. My great fear at this time was that I might be led into being indiscreet which would involve Simon. I must at all costs respect his desire for secrecy. I must remember that if his is whereabouts were betrayed he would be brought back to face a death sentence.