Cynthia Cartier - Wings

Liddy passed Marina the toddler and followed the couple to a bench down by the river. She had avoided them and they must have been offended. But as she tried to make sense of that idea, her breathing and heartbeat quickened. She was sweating but she didn’t know why.

“Let’s sit down,” said Ellis.

Liddy’s heart raced as she sat on one end, Ellis on the other and Jenna in the middle. Jenna looked at Liddy for a long time and then took her hand and tried to smile as she seemed to search for words. “Liddy.” She exhaled a soft breath and then inhaled before she spoke again. “Reid’s alive.”

Every space in Liddy’s brain filled with heat, and she studied Jenna’s face waiting for her to speak again, but she didn’t.

Ellis placed his arm over Jenna’s shoulder and scooted in closer to his wife. He covered both the women’s hands with his and looked at Liddy. “He was thrown from the canopy before he crashed. A farmer got to him before the Germans did and kept him hidden. When the farmer got word the German lines had retreated he took Reid to an allied camp.” Ellis waited for Liddy to look at him, and she finally did. “He’s back in the states now.”

Liddy didn’t speak and just stared back at the couple.

“Liddy, did you hear what we said?” Jenna tightened her squeeze on Liddy’s hand.

“Say it again,” said Liddy.

“Reid’s alive, Liddy,” Jenna repeated. “Are you okay?”

“No. No, I’m not okay.” Liddy looked across the river. “It just doesn’t…” She tried to swallow but her throat hurt and felt full. “When… how long has he been back?”

“March,” Ellis answered.

Liddy ran it all through her head— three months ago . “Then why didn’t he…?”

“He lost part of a leg and… he was hurt badly,” said Jenna.

Liddy looked at her friend and then back to the river.

“He’s having a rough time of it,” said Ellis. “He didn’t want you to know. He didn’t want us to tell you.”

“Then why are you?”

“We thought he would come around, but it hasn’t happened.” Ellis looked back at his wife.

“We thought you should know.” Jenna squeezed Liddy’s hand tighter as if she was trying to keep her from falling apart.

“Where is he?”

“He’s in a rehabilitation unit at the Navy hospital in Pensacola,” Ellis answered.

Liddy tried to see Reid’s face but it kept floating away. She had spent the last few months not allowing herself to visit him anymore. She had stopped reading his letters and chased away the memories and the pain. She was making room for Alan.

“Are you gonna be okay?” Jenna set her hand on Liddy’s cheek and turned it to her. “Liddy?”

Liddy shook her head slowly. “I don’t know.”

Jenna and Ellis sat with her in silence for a long time until Liddy told them she wanted to be alone. Jenna was worried and made her friend promise to call her, and they left. Liddy stayed on the bench. She didn’t want to move and at the same time, wanted to be where Reid was as fast as she could get to him.

When Alan sat down, he landed with a bounce. He smelled like cigars and bourbon and he was wrapped in complete contentment. He smiled at Liddy and tried to get one back but she didn’t have one to give.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, still smiling.

Liddy closed her eyes and wished she could disappear to someplace dark and still. She needed time. She needed time.

“Tell me what’s wrong, Liddy.”

She looked into the face of that sweet man and thought how wonderful and awful life was. War complicated life and life complicated war, and her life had never been more complicated than in this moment. She wanted to protect Alan but knew she couldn’t.

“You’re scaring me, Sweet Cakes. What’s going on?”

Liddy’s mouth opened to say something, but what? How? She studied Alan’s face and prayed for time to stand still.

“Liddy.” Alan took her chin. “Please.”

“Reid Trent is alive,” she blurted it out and looked down at her hands.

The contentment drained from Alan’s face and he leaned back on the bench. “How do you know?”

“Jenna and Ellis told me.”

The night got quieter the longer they sat without either of them saying anything.

“What are you going to do?” Alan’s words were quiet and slow.

Liddy looked up and saw Alan’s sad face—every part of it was sad. She couldn’t bear it and turned away and closed her eyes. “I have to see him.” When she looked back up at him, Alan was nodding softly. “I’m so sorry, Alan. I have to see him.”

Liddy left the Atlanta airport the next morning and flew straight to Florida. She thought about Alan and that whatever happened, she had hurt him deeply. She thought about Reid and what she would say to him when she saw him.

At the hospital she asked to see Major Reid Trent, and a nurse led her down the hall and outside to a patio. It overlooked crowded beds filled with the tall blades of Cannas that held their bowl-sized blooms above their tips. The big leaves of the Catalpa trees cradled their show of pink bouquets, and teacup-sized Glads chimed in. Every growing thing seemed to have its own bloom and must have known nothing of life. The nurse pointed to a man sitting in a wheelchair that faced the garden and went back inside.

Liddy studied the back of the person wearing the pale-gray hospital robe and didn’t recognize anything about the figure. For the first time since she heard the words, ‘Reid’s alive’ from Jenna, she questioned if this is what she should be doing. Her heart was heavy with thoughts of Alan and her mind wouldn’t level.

All the thinking she had done about what she would do in this moment, had not led her to settle on a thing. Before her heart and mind could battle for one more second, she set her feet in motion and grabbed a chair as she passed one of the patio tables. She walked to where the man sat, set the chair in front of him and looked at his face and recognized it. “Excuse me, sir, is this seat taken?”

Reid looked up at Liddy and she realized that she had never seen pure surprise on this face. There were so many things she had never had the chance to see on this face, but it was the face of Major Reid Trent. It was his face, his evergreen eyes and sun-thickened skin that she was seeing unshaven for the first time. His hair wasn’t clipped off short. It was thick and curved softly back and forth for four or five inches, and a curled lock of hair hung to the side of his forehead. A pink scar ran from behind his right ear and disappeared under his collar. He looked thin, but his shoulders were broad and straight.

“Did you hear me, sir? Is this seat taken?”

“No.” Reid’s response was lifeless.

Liddy sat down in the chair and leaned back resting her elbows on the arms and laced her fingers together in front of her. She looked into his eyes and wouldn’t let go. His face didn’t change and held no smirk or twinkle, and he seemed tortured by her gaze. Still, every uninvited desire that she had ever felt for this man ran through her body. A tingling ran over her skin and her muscles tightened. Her heart pounded and in that moment it let her mind rest and told her that this was where she was supposed to be.

“I’ve written you a few letters you haven’t answered. What are you gonna do about that?” asked Liddy.

In almost a whisper, Reid said, “Liddy…” Then he moved his mouth but only air escaped until he finally got out, “… I wish you hadn’t come here.”

“You do, do you, and why is that?”

“Everything is different now.”

Liddy sat up straight and her hands gripped the arms of the chair. “Really, tell me what’s different.”