F. Anstey - Mr Punch's Pocket Ibsen – A Collection of Some of the Master's Best Known Dramas

The concluding piece, "Pill-Doctor Herdal," is, as the observant reader will instantly perceive, rather a reverent attempt to tread in the footprints of the Norwegian dramatist, than a version of any actually existing masterpiece. The author is conscious that his imitation is painfully lacking in the mysterious obscurity of the original, that the vein of allegorical symbolism is thinner throughout than it should be, and that the characters are not nearly so mad as persons invariably are in real life – but these are the faults inevitable to a prentice hand, and he trusts that due allowances may be made for them by the critical.

In conclusion he wishes to express his acknowledgments to Messrs. Bradbury and Agnew for their permission to reprint the present volume, the contents of which made their original appearance in the pages of "Punch"

Sitting-room at Rosmershölm, with a stove, flower-stand, windows, ancient and modern ancestors, doors, and everything handsome about it. Rebecca West is sitting knitting a large antimacassar which is nearly finished. Now and then she looks out of a window, and smiles and nods expectantly to someone outside. Madam Helseth is laying the table for supper.

[ Folding up her work slowly. ] But tell me precisely, what about this white horse?

Lord forgive you, Miss! – [ fetching cruet-stand, and placing it on table ] – but you're making fun of me!

[ Gravely. ] No, indeed. Nobody makes fun at Rosmershölm. Mr. Rosmer would not understand it. [ Shutting window. ] Ah, here is Rector Kroll. [ Opening door. ] You will stay to supper, will you not, Rector, and I will tell them to give us some little extra dish.

[ Hanging up his hat in the hall. ] Many thanks. [ Wipes his boots. ] May I come in? [ Comes in, puts down his stick, sits down, and looks about him. ] And how do you and Rosmer get on together, eh?

Ever since your sister, Beata, went mad and jumped into the mill-race, we have been as happy as two little birds together. [ After a pause, sitting down in arm-chair. ] So you don't really mind my living here all alone with Rosmer? We were afraid you might, perhaps.

Why, how on earth – on the contrary, I shouldn't object at all if you – [ looks at her meaningly ] – h'm!

[ Interrupting, gravely. ] For shame, Rector; how can you make such jokes?

[ As if surprised. ] Jokes! We do not joke in these parts – but here is Rosmer.

So, my dear old friend, you have come again, after a year's absence. [ Sits down. ] We almost thought that —

[ Nods. ] So Miss West was saying – but you are quite mistaken. I merely thought I might remind you, if I came, of our poor Beata's suicide, so I kept away. We Norwegians are not without our simple tact.

It was considerate – but unnecessary. Reb – I mean , Miss West – and I often allude to the incident, do we not?

[ Strikes Tändstickor. ] Oh yes, indeed. [ Lighting lamp. ] Whenever we feel a little more cheerful than usual.

You dear good people! [ Wanders up the room. ] I came because the Spirit of Revolt has crept into my School. A Secret Society has existed for weeks in the Lower Third! To-day it has come to my knowledge that a booby trap was prepared for me by the hand of my own son, Laurits, and I then discovered that a hair had been inserted in my cane by my daughter Hilda! The only way in which a right-minded Schoolmaster can combat this anarchic and subversive spirit is to start a newspaper, and I thought that you, as a weak, credulous, inexperienced and impressionable kind of man, were the very person to be the Editor.

[ With a look at Rosmer. ] Tell him now!

[ Returning the look. ] I can't – Some other evening. Well, perhaps – [ To Kroll.] I can't be your Editor – because [ in a low voice ] I – I am on the side of Laurits and Hilda!

[ Looks from one to the other, gloomily. ] H'm!

Yes. Since we last met, I have changed my views. I am going to create a new democracy, and awaken it to its true task of making all the people of this country noblemen, by freeing their wills, and purifying their minds!

What do you mean!

[ Bowing his head. ] I don't quite know, my dear friend; it was Reb – I should say Miss West's scheme.

H'm! [ A suspicion appears in his face. ] Now I begin to believe that what Beata said about schemes – no matter. But under the circumstances, I will not stay to supper.

I told you he would be annoyed. I shall go to bed now. I don't want any supper. [ He lights a candle, and goes out; presently his footsteps are heard overhead, as he undresses . Rebecca pulls a bell-rope.

[ To Madam Helseth, who enters with dishes. ] No, Mr. Rosmer will not have supper to-night. [ In a lighter tone. ] Perhaps he is afraid of the nightmare. There are so many sorts of White Horses in this world!

[ Shaking. ] Lord! lord! that Miss West – the things she does say!

Rosmer's study. Doors and windows, bookshelves, a writing-table. Door, with curtain, leading to Rosmer's bedroom. Rosmer discovered in a smoking jacket cutting a pamphlet with a paper-knife. There is a knock at the door. Rosmer says "Come in." Rebecca enters in a morning wrapper and curl-papers. She sits on a chair close to Rosmer, and looks over his shoulder as he cuts the leaves. Rector Kroll is shown up.

[ Lays his hat on the table and looks at Rebecca from head to foot. ] I am really afraid that I am in the way.

[ Surprised. ] Because I am in my morning wrapper and curl-papers? You forget that I am emancipated , Rector Kroll.

Yes, Miss West and I have worked our way forward in faithful comradeship.

[ Shakes his head at him slowly. ] So I perceive. Miss West is naturally inclined to be forward. But, I say, really you know – However, I came to tell you that poor Beata was not so mad as she looked, though flowers did bewilder her so. [ Taking off his gloves meaningly. ] She jumped into the mill-race because she had an idea that you ought to marry Miss West!