Даниэла Стил - The Affair

For the first few weeks of their affair, he thought it was just a fling, and then he believed he was in love with her when she told him about the baby. He was attached to her, but he was even more so to his wife and family. He was sexually addicted to Pascale, and he knew the difference now. He was giving himself three months to get over her, by the time the baby was born, but he wasn’t ready to leave her yet. It was awkward that their affair had become so public. He had no idea if Nadia would ever take him back and be willing to continue their marriage. It didn’t look that way at the moment, and with every passing day it seemed less likely, which had begun to panic him. The press continued to add insult to injury. He didn’t want to let Pascale add to that. He doubted that she really loved him. He was the father of her child, and her lover, but that was as far as it went for her. Like most of the actresses Nicolas knew, she was only interested in herself, and oblivious to the impact and the consequences for him. Nadia was a woman of integrity and courage. Pascale was an entirely different breed. She was narcissistic and amoral, and even now, her appeal for him was mostly physical. She was the sexiest woman he’d ever met. He had lost his mind temporarily, but he was certain now he didn’t want to lose his marriage because of their affair.

“I want to be in Saint Tropez with you in August, when it’s fun. We can go to your château in September,” Pascale insisted, it sounded dull to her, with no social life in the area and nothing to do. She wasn’t anxious to spend much time at the château and miss time in Saint-Tropez. And in September, she couldn’t go far anyway, a month before her due date. The people he knew who lived near his château, in lives similar to his family life, sounded deadly boring to her. She wanted the fast lane, just as she was living it now in Saint-Tropez, and had been for the past few years. That was the excitement and one of the benefits of fame for her.

“Nadia is taking the girls to America for a few weeks in July and early August. We can go to the château then. It’s beautiful there in summer,” he said to Pascale, as she freed him from his underwear and closed her mouth around him. He forgot everything else when she did. The discussion ended there about where they were going to spend July or August or weekends, or his being with Nadia for Bastille Day. He could think about that later. Like everything else he didn’t want to face now. Even the baby faded from his mind when Pascale worked her magic on him.

—

When Rose got back to her office after the Fourth of July weekend at the château with her daughters, two of the senior editors were lying in wait for her. They had discussed it the previous Friday, after Rose left, and they strongly felt that Nicolas Bateau needed to be part of the interview that was going to be their feature story in September.

“He’s too big a part of her stardom right now, because of the movie. If he were just an ordinary guy, or only her boyfriend, we could leave him out of it. As it is, the interview will be hollow without him. And let’s face it, he’s the more interesting subject. She has nothing to say. She’s a decent actress, and a gorgeous girl, but we’re not going to get much out of the interview. We need him.”

Rose argued the point with them as intelligently as she could, but editorially, she knew they were right, and with a terrible tug in her heart, she was tempted to concede for the sake of the magazine. She hated the idea of Nicolas being part of the interview and in the photographs that would be taken of them together as a couple, and what it would do to Nadia when the magazine came out. She promised the editors to think about it and called Nadia as soon as they left her office. She had promised them a definite answer by the next day. She reached Nadia at Heathrow, waiting to catch her plane back to Paris.

“I really want to keep him out of it,” Rose said after explaining the situation to Nadia. She had tears in her eyes that her daughter couldn’t see. “I’m under a lot of pressure about it. But I don’t want you hurt.”

Nadia was characteristically gracious about it, and appreciated that her mother wanted to protect her. She sounded sad and defeated with a quiet sigh. She’d had a good day with her client, and hated to face the nightmare again.

“I’m not sure it matters. Everyone knows about the affair and the baby anyway,” Nadia said wearily.

“He’s made a total ass of himself with this girl, ever since Cannes,” Rose said angrily, “and she isn’t worth a damn, baby or no baby. I think the baby is just an accessory to her. I feel terrible letting him be part of the interview. The editors feel they need him in the piece. She has nothing to say that anyone wants to hear. But you’re what matters most to me.” Rose sounded emotional about it.

“Don’t worry about it, Mom. I can live with it,” Nadia said, dignified. She was determined to rise above it, and not let Pascale and Nicolas ruin her life. It was a major challenge.

“At least we have a writer who isn’t going to dig for dirt,” Rose said quietly. “I’ll do everything I can to keep your name out of it and to make sure the interview isn’t shocking and doesn’t romanticize them, if I let them do it.”

“You can’t keep me out of it, Mom,” Nadia said realistically. “I’m his wife, the woman he dumped for her.” But the problem was that he hadn’t dumped her. He wanted both of them, and to eventually come home to her after the affair ended, when the baby was born or when Pascale moved on to her next film and her next man. So far, Pascale had gotten involved with every leading man she acted with, and this time, with the producer/director. “Don’t worry about me, Mom. I’ll be fine, even if he’s in the interview. Thank you for asking me. You have to do your job, and I’m sure it will be a respectable piece. I love you, it’s okay.”

Rose still hated to let the editors have their way, and thanked Nadia for her understanding. After she hung up, Rose was in a bad mood for the rest of the day, which was rare for her. She was sick and tired of the Nicolas Bateau/Pascale Solon story. She couldn’t wait for it to be over, and dreaded what they’d say in the interview. Nicolas had put them all in a terrible position, even Rose.

Nadia knew it was just another form of the torture she was living through. She could hardly wait to leave for the States. She was starting their trip in L.A., at Athena’s. And all she had to get through before that was the Bastille Day weekend, with Nicolas at the château with them. It was hurdle after hurdle after hurdle these days. But she was determined to clear them as gracefully as she could, and survive it. She was facing it with courage and dignity. No one could take that from her, no matter what he did.

Rose sent her senior features editors an email at the end of the day, giving them permission to include Nicolas in the interview, but she informed them in no uncertain terms that she would do the final edit of the piece herself, which was nonnegotiable if they wanted him in it. They didn’t argue with her about it. They knew better. Rose’s word was law at Mode, and no one was going to cross her on this. Having Nicolas in the interview was victory enough for them.

Chapter 7

The Bastille Day weekend at the château had a surreal quality to it. Nicolas made a huge effort to act as though nothing had changed, and put on a show for their children. He was attentive to Nadia and adorable to the girls. Nadia tried to keep to herself, and leave the girls alone with him, while Nicolas insisted on including her in everything. They took the girls to the beach and collected seashells, wandered through the little shops in Deauville, went to their favorite restaurant, and the rest of the time, stayed in the pool at the château. Nicolas taught Laure how to dive off the diving board, and had endless patience with them. He seemed to be loving every minute of it, which Nadia wasn’t. She felt crazy halfway through the weekend. It was as though Pascale had never happened, he wasn’t in love with her, and she wasn’t carrying his baby. To anyone who didn’t know them, they looked like a normal family having a terrific weekend.