Alan Milne - Winnie the Pooh

"Oh!" said Pooh. He thought for a long time, and then asked, "What mulberry bush

"Bon-hommy," went on Eeyore gloomily. "French word meaning bonhommy," he explained. "I'm not complaining, but There It Is."

Pooh sat down on a large stone, and tried to think this out. It sounded to him like a riddle, and he was never much good at riddles, being a Bear of Very

Little Brain. So he sang Cottleston Pie instead:

Cottleslon, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie.

A fly can't bird, but a bird can fly.

Ask me a riddle and I reply:

"Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie."

That was the first verse. When he had finished it, Eeyore didn't actually say that he didn't like it, so Pooh very kindly sang the second verse to him:

Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie,

Ask me a riddle and I reply:

"Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie."

Eeyore still said nothing at all, so Pooh hummed the third verse quietly to himself:

Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie,

Why does a chicken, I don't know why.

Ask me a riddle and I reply:

"Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie."

"That's right," said Eeyore. "Sing. Umty-tiddly, umty-too. Here we go gathering

Nuts and May. Enjoy yourself."

"I am," said Pooh.

"Some can," said Eeyore.

"You seem so sad, Eeyore."

"Sad? Why should I be sad? It's my birthday. The happiest day of the year."

"Of course it is. Can't you see? Look at all the presents I have had." He waved a foot from side to side. "Look at the birthday cake. Candles and pink sugar."

"Presents?" said Pooh. "Birthday cake?" said Pooh. "Where?"

"Neither can I," said Eeyore. "Joke," he explained. "Ha ha!"

Pooh scratched his head, being a little puzzled by all this.

"And many happy returns to you, Pooh Bear."

"No, it's mine."

"Well, why not? You don't always want to be miserable on my birthday, do you?"

"Oh, I see," said Pooh.

"It's bad enough." said Eeyore. almost breaking down "being miserable myself, what with no presents and no cake and no candles, and no proper notice taken of me at all, but if everybody else is going to be miserable too-"

This was too much for Pooh. "Stay there!" he called to Eeyore, as he turned and hurried back home as quick as he could; for he felt that he must get poor Eeyore a present of some sort at once, and he could always think of a proper one

Outside his house he found Piglet, jumping up and down trying to reach the

"Hallo, Piglet," he said.

"Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet.

"I was trying to reach the knocker," said Piglet. "I just came round-"

"Let me do it for you," said Pooh kindly. So he reached up and knocked at the door. "I have just seen Eeyore is in a Very Sad Condition, because it's his birthday, and nobody has taken any notice of it, and he's very Gloomy-you know what Eeyore is-and there he was, and- What a long time whoever lives here is answering this door." And he knocked again.

"Oh!" said Pooh. "So it is," he said. "Well, let's go in."

So in they went. The first thing Pooh did was to go to the cupboard to see if he had quite a small jar of honey left; and he had, so he took it down.

"I'm giving this to Eeyore," he explained, "as a present. What are you going to

"No," said Pooh. "That would not be a good plan."

"All right, then, I'll give him a balloon. I've got one left from my party. I'll

"That, Piglet, is a very good idea. It is just what Eeyore wants to cheer him up. Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon."

So off Piglet trotted; and in the other direction went Pooh, with his jar of

It was a warm day, and he had a long way to go. He hadn't gone more than half-way when a sort of funny feeling began to creep all over him. It began at the tip of his nose and trickled all through him and out at the soles of his feet. It was just as if somebody inside him were saying, "Now then, Pooh, time

"Dear, dear," said Pooh, "I didn't know it was as late as that." So he sat down and took the top off his jar of honey. "Lucky I brought this with me," he thought. "Many a bear going out on a warm day like this would never have thought of bringing a little something with him." And he began to eat.

"Now let me see," he thought! as he took his last lick of the inside of the jar,

"Where was I going? Ah, yes, Eeyore." He got up

And then, suddenly, he remembered. He had eaten Eeyore's birthday present!

"Bother!" said Pooh. "What shall I do? I must give him something."

For a little while he couldn't think of anything. Then he thought: "Well, it's a very nice pot, even if there's no honey in it, and if I washed it clean, and got somebody to write 'A Happy Birthday' on it, Eeyore could keep things in it, which might be Useful." So, as he was just passing the Hundred Acre Wood, he went inside to call on Owl, who lived there.

"Good morning, Owl," he said.

"Good morning, Pooh," said Owl.

"Many happy returns of Eeyore's birthday," said Pooh.

"I'm giving him a Useful Pot to Keep Things In, and I wanted to ask you "

"Is this it?" said Owl, taking it out of Pooh's paw.

"Somebody has been keeping honey in it," said Owl.

"You can keep anything in it," said Pooh earnestly. "It's Very Useful like that.

"That was what I wanted to ask you," said Pooh. "Because my spelling is Wobbly.

It's good spelling but it Wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places.

"It's a nice pot," said Owl, looking at it all round. "Couldn't I give it too?

"No," said Pooh. "That would not be a good plan. Now I'll just wash it first,

Well, he washed the pot out, and dried it, while Owl licked the end of his pencil, and wondered how to spell "birthday."