Daphne Clair - Grounds For Marriage

‘Trying to do?’ he asked innocently. ‘I thought I was being the almost perfect...guest.’

She noticed the hesitation. Technically he might be a guest, but his place in her daughter’s life made him more than that. Tonight he’d acted rather like a host trying his best to put a not-very-welcome guest at ease, and perhaps it was unfair of her to suspect any deliberation on his part. But she couldn’t help feeling that he had set out to demonstrate his familiarity with the house and its occupants, to make Julian feel like an outsider. He’d even acted with a subtle possessiveness towards Lacey herself.

As if he’d been following her thoughts, Tully asked, ‘Is where you’re going to live one of the things you and Julian haven’t discussed yet?’

‘We’re thinking about it. Julian’s house has three bedrooms, so the girls wouldn’t have to share a room. Or we could buy a new place.’

‘So what will you do with this?’

‘That’s up to you.’

‘It’s half yours.’

Lacey shook her head. ‘That was only a legal safeguard for Emma’s sake, in case something happened to you. You paid for it.’

He didn’t look pleased, but he apparently decided not to pursue the subject. Instead he stared broodingly at the dying fire, sipping at the whisky in his glass.

Lacey said quietly, ‘Things change. Emma will get used to new surroundings, new circumstances. So will you.’

He turned to look at her, his eyes sombre. ‘It won’t be the same... will it?’

‘No, it won’t be the same.’ She felt a twinge of sadness, a painful tug of regret, and deliberately hardened her heart. ‘But it needn’t affect your relationship with Emma.’

His mouth twisted in a strange sort of smile. ‘As a matter of fact, I wasn’t thinking of Emma. I was thinking of my relationship with you.’

‘With... me?’

‘We do have one, you know.’

‘Of course,’ she agreed. ‘As Emma’s parents...’

‘Is that the only way you see me? As Emma’s father?’

Lacey frowned uncertainly. What did he want her to say? Not for anything would she betray to him how difficult it had been to make herself think of him in that role alone, how long it had taken her to forsake foolish teenage dreams. If he wanted his ego stroked, there were plenty of other women who would do it for him—along with anything else he asked of them. ‘How else should I see you?’ she asked reasonably. ‘If it wasn’t for Emma we wouldn’t have a relationship at all.’

He looked at her with speculation, as if considering the question. ‘How can you be sure?’ With spurious humility, he added, ‘Hard to believe though it may be, most of the women I know don’t actually view me first and foremost as a father.’

She didn’t find it hard to believe at all. He had lost none of the male charisma he’d had at nineteen. If anything it had intensified with maturity, and in her case familiarity had not bred contempt, but rather a guarded awareness. Caught once in the trap of his careless sexuality, she had made up her mind a long time ago that she wasn’t going to walk into it again. ‘I’m sure they don’t,’ she said crisply. ‘Fortunately, I know you better than most women do.’

His head cocked to one side, he said, ‘I suppose you do.’ He paused. ‘Why “fortunately”?’

She’d hoped he wouldn’t pick up on that. ‘For one thing,’ she said hastily, ‘you don’t have to worry that I’ll try to drag you to the altar.’

His eyes were enigmatic, but very intent. ‘Until recently I thought you had a distinct aversion to the state of matrimony yourself.’

‘I never said that.’

‘Mm. I gather that the aversion was to me.’

‘Not to you personally. To the idea of marriage with you.’

‘There’s a difference?’

‘Of course there’s a difference. Marrying just to give Emma two parents would have been disastrous.’

‘I agree it probably would have been when we were both teenagers. Although...’ He shrugged. ‘Who knows? It might have worked out okay.’

Lacey shook her head. ‘We were too young.’

‘Too young to be parents? I guess so—objectively. But Emma’s okay.’

‘Yes. At least we got that right.’

‘You did. I’m well aware that I’m only a part-time father. And now...’ she was surprised at the fierce regret she saw in his face ‘...some one else may get the chance that I never had.’

‘I’m sorry,’ she said awkwardly. ‘I didn’t know you felt so strongly about it.’

‘Didn’t you?’ His glance was almost hostile, before he got up and went to stand looking at the remains of the fire, his hand resting on the mantel above it. ‘No,’ he said. ‘How could you? I hardly knew myself.’ He turned to look at her searchingly. ‘You’re entitled to look for a bit of happiness. Heaven knows I’ve no right stop you. But are you sure it’s Julian you want?’

‘I’m old enough now to know exactly what I want,’ she said unequivocally, pushing away a small, nagging doubt. Of course she and Julian had a tacit understanding that much depended on their children’s reactions, but neither of them had expected any major problems to arise.

Why, just when Tully seemed to be capitulating completely to the idea, did she suddenly feel afraid, unsure of herself and of the future to which she’d virtually committed both herself and Emma? Saying it aloud in an unconscious effort to dispel the fear, she declared, ‘Julian and I love each other. I’ve told him I’ll marry him, and that’s what I intend to do.’

He looked at her silently, apparently weighing her answer.

Moving restlessly under his probing gaze, Lacey said, ‘So can I count on you letting Emma know that it’s all right with you?’

‘Don’t rush me,’ he said softly, and although his eyes remained on her face she had the impression that his mind had gone off on a tangent. ‘I’m thinking about it.’

‘How long do you need to think?’

He came away from the mantel. ‘I’ll let you know. Julian said there’s no hurry...’

That last almost sounded like a question, but she didn’t comment.

Stopping in front of her, he put a hand lightly under her chin, stooping towards her.

Remembering the last time he’d kissed her goodbye, Lacey instinctively turned her face aside.

His fingers tightened, forcing her to look at him. He was close; she could see the fine lines at the corners of his eyes, and as she watched his pupils dilated, filled with dark fire. She saw her own uplifted face reflected in them, felt an answering lick of fire deep inside her, an unwilled hunger.

Then Tully released her and stepped back. His chest moved with a quick breath. Somehow he looked nearly as disconcerted as Lacey felt.

She stood up. ‘I’ll see you out.’

‘Don’t bother.’

He gave her another probing, appraising look and left her staring rather blankly after him as he strode out of the room. A minute later she heard the outer door close.

CHAPTER THREE

WHEN Tully telephoned her a few days later Lacey’s first hope was that he’d thought over her suggestion and decided to agree.

But instead he said, ‘I’ve been inveigled into taking part in a charity “Welcome to Spring” water derby at Mission Bay on Sunday. I thought Emma might like to come along and watch her. old man get a dunking or two.’

‘I’m sure she’d love it. I’ll ask her for you.’

‘You’d have to come, too. I don’t want to leave her on her own, especially near water. She could bring along a friend if she wants to, but they’d need an adult nearby.’

‘No convenient girlfriend at the moment?’ Lacey inquired rather dryly.

‘No current girlfriend,’ he confirmed. ‘So, are you free?’