Daphne Clair - Grounds For Marriage

‘Maybe you should set yourself up as a counsellor,’ she suggested, with more than a hint of sarcasm, ‘as you’re so knowledgeable about these things.’

‘I’m not claiming any special knowledge. I’ve seen some of my friends in similar situations, and read a few articles. Common sense should tell you it’s not going to be easy.’

‘Do you think the last ten years have been easy for me?’

She saw him visibly stiffen, as though she’d accused him. ‘I’ve done all I can to make it so,’ he said.

‘I know that.’ She looked at him helplessly. ‘You’ve done more than most men would have in the circumstances, and I’m grateful—’

He made an impatient gesture. ‘I owed it to you...and to Emma.’

‘I agree you owed it to Emma,’ she said, ‘but it would have been easy to walk away. That’s what everyone fully expected you to do.’

His jaw tightened. ‘You certainly have a great idea of my character.’

‘You were nineteen. It would have been understandable. But maybe now you owe it to Emma to help me establish a more normal family life for her.’

‘Are you saying you’re doing this for Emma’s sake?’ Tully enquired.

At the deliberate mockery and conjecture in his gaze, she felt a slight heat on her cheeks. ‘No, I’m not saying that. But it is a consideration.’

‘Be honest, Lacey,’ he said brutally. ‘You’ve got the hots for this Julian, and you want me to make it easy for you by talking Emma round.’

Her hands went out to close on the back of the nearest chair. ‘That’s a foul thing to say! And it’s not true!’

‘I’m sorry if you find my language too basic. You’re not going to pretend that sex doesn’t enter into it?’

‘Sex is a very small part of love. There are much more important things.’

‘Really? Tell me about them.’

‘Respect, for one. And consideration—tenderness, sharing...’

He made a disparaging little sound. ‘Does Julian think sex is unimportant?’

‘I didn’t say it’s unimportant.’

‘A small part of love? That doesn’t sound as though you place much importance on it.’

‘One thing I learned from my experience with you,’ she said acidly, ‘is that sex on its own is worth nothing!’

An oddly bleak expression flickered across his face. Then he asked, ‘Isn’t Emma worth something?’

‘I wouldn’t be without her for anything in the world. You know that! But at the time the last thing on our minds was making a baby.’ A starkly vivid memory flash caught her unawares, and her pulse rate momentarily increased.

‘That doesn’t mean it was worthless. At the time it meant a great deal to me. You were sweet and caring, and I felt very...grateful.’

‘You were drunk,’ Lacey reminded him ruthlessly. ‘And maudlin. The thing is, Emma does exist, and I’m trying to do the best for her. But I...I have needs, too.’

‘Needs?’ He scanned her face, and her skin burned.

‘I’d like a real family,’ she said steadily. ‘I want to be married.’

‘I’ve offered you marriage. More than once.’

She gave a tiny shrug, her lips tugging into a smile. ‘And I appreciate the offer, Tully., but it wouldn’t work.’

‘How do you know it wouldn’t work? We get on all right.’

They did, when he came to collect Emma, or just dropped in and ended up staying for a meal. And on the fairly rare occasions that he’d persuaded Lacey to join them for an outing. But he’d never really wanted to marry her. He’d be doing it for Emma. ‘We get on fine,’ she agreed, ‘as far as we need to for Emma’s sake. It’s quite different from sharing a home and...’

‘And a bed,’ he finished for her.

It wasn’t what she’d been going to say, but she let that go.

‘All right,’ he said abruptly. ‘I won’t promise anything, but I’ll keep an open mind. Only I’m not going to try to influence Emma, not until I meet this guy.’

Lacey supposed she could hardly ask more. She’d always been glad that Tully had been so ready to acknowledge Emma as his child and spend so much time with her. This was just a manifestation of his love and concern, so she shouldn’t complain. ‘I’ll try to arrange something.’

‘Yes, do that.’ He reached over and retrieved his jacket, swinging it across his shoulder. Again she saw a speculative, slightly surprised and perhaps even calculating gleam in his dark eyes as he stood for a moment or two just looking at her.

He was probably wondering what Julian saw in her. But not every man was spoiled for choice. ‘I’ll call Emma,’ she said hastily, ‘and tell her you’re leaving.’

As usual they walked out to the car with him. Emma returned his hug and kiss with gusto, and then he turned to Lacey. Expecting the customary peck on her cheek, she stood with her hand on Emma’s shoulder and lifted her face.

But this time, instead of brushing her cheek his lips came down warmly against hers, pressing them apart.

Lacey stepped back, her eyes flying wide, to find him looking at her with a mixture of challenge and curiosity. Then he abruptly turned and got into the driver’s seat, slamming the door and giving Emma a wave and a smile before backing out.

Confused, Lacey stared after the receding car. Her heart was pounding and she could still feel the possessive imprint of his kiss on her mouth.

What on earth had he meant by it?

CHAPTER TWO

‘OF COURSE I’ll meet Emma’s father,’ Julian said. ‘She’s a lucky little girl that he’s so concerned about her welfare.’

They were sitting in his car on Lacey’s driveway at the conclusion of a rare evening date, Emma having been invited to stay overnight at a friend’s house. It had been a treat for Lacey to see a show and share a leisurely supper without having to worry about getting home to let a baby-sitter off the hook. Most of her outings were daytime ones, when Emma was at school or out with Tully, and when she ate out it was generally lunch with a friend.

Julian had chosen a North Shore restaurant, driving over the Harbour Bridge at dusk while the light of the dying sun still sheened the waters of the Waitemata. After leaving the restaurant he had switched on the car heater against the wintry coolness of the night, making Lacey feel warm and pampered, replete with adult conversation and delicious food. And he had responded in his customary amiable, reasonable manner to her relaying of Tully’s request.

‘You’re such a nice man!’ she told him gratefully.

He chuckled, drawing her closer and rubbing his cheek gently against her temple. ‘Thank you. I’m very glad you think so. I hope your daughter will come to the same conclusion. I want to get to know her properly.’ His mouth touched her cheek, and wandered, seeking her lips.

Lacey returned his kiss, and let him push open her jacket and stroke her body, liking the pleasurable, tingling feelings he aroused.

After a few minutes Julian drew back, breathing heavily. ‘I’m too old for necking in a car,’ he said humorously. ‘Are you going to invite me in, Lacey?’

He must have noticed her hesitation, and she felt him begin to move away.

‘Yes,’ she said, ‘if you like. But—’

‘I’m not trying to rush you into bed,’ he assured her. ‘I absolutely respect your views. When you have a daughter it’s important to live by the values you try to impart to her.’

‘I’ll make coffee,’ she offered, groping for the door handle.

When he left half an hour later, she washed up the coffee cups and told herself that her feeling of flatness and dissatisfaction was caused by physical frustration.

She’d been repressing her sexuality for years, quite deliberately and not without difficulty. If occasionally a stirring of desire had made itself felt she had ruthlessly quelled it. She had a child who was her first priority, and a close relationship with a man would only cause unnecessary complications in her life. She’d concentrated on keeping herself too busy to be bothered. Apart from looking after Emma, she had taken courses in computer keyboarding and office procedures so that she could work from home, and then embarked on a part-time degree course in business administration which she’d now nearly completed.