Elizabeth Elgin - Windflower Wedding

‘I know. And I liked her a lot. If Kitty hadn’t happened along, I should think the three of us would still be going out together every time we dock.’

‘You’re missing Kitty, aren’t you? Poor love – I do know how it is. But London isn’t Washington. You’ll see her soon.’

‘On my next long leave, I suppose. Hope she can get time off. I’ll go to London if she can’t, though I’d rather go home to Rowangarth. I miss it, Daiz.’

‘Well, you can’t have it all ways! And surely ENSA will give Kitty leave? After all, you’ve got a wedding to arrange. But it’s Lyn you want to talk about, isn’t it? And you’d best be sharp; I’ll have to be in, soon.’

‘How is she, Daiz? I’m not so big-headed as to think she’ll have gone into purdah over me when she could have any bloke she wanted.’

‘Except Drew Sutton.’ Daisy set her mouth button-round.

‘I’m sorry about that. The Rowangarth Suttons seem good at it – falling heavily and suddenly, I mean.’

‘And what would have happened if Kitty hadn’t come along? Be honest, Drew.’

‘It would have been Lyn, I’m almost sure. There was something holding me back, though.’

‘Some one called Kitty. And Lyn didn’t just like you, Drew. She was mad about you. I think she still is, though she’s getting good at pretending she isn’t.’

‘I wouldn’t have hurt her, Daiz. Not for anything.’

‘You mean you wouldn’t have deliberately hurt her? I know that, but you did, Drew, and there’s nothing anyone can do about it.’

‘You can be quite bossy when you set your mind to it!’

‘Sister’s privilege. And I’m as sad about it as Lyn is because I like Lyn and Kitty – and you, too, you great soft ha’p’orth. I’m piggy-in-the-middle, I suppose. But c’mon, bruv; give me a hug and a kiss.’

‘I’ve enjoyed tonight.’ He circled her in his arms, laying his cheek on hers. ‘Take care of yourself. See you.’

‘You too, Drew Sutton. When are you sailing?’

‘Morning tide. And remember to say hi to Keth for me, next time you write.’

‘I’ll do that. Careful how you go, sailor. Be lucky.’

She stood at the gate of Hellas House until he rounded the corner. He didn’t turn and wave. Sailors never did. They never said goodbye either.

Her eyes filled with tears; not for Drew nor Lyn nor Kitty but for herself, because she loved Keth so much and wanted him so desperately.

Take care of Keth, won’t you – and Drew? she pleaded silently. And God – when is this war going to end?

‘I really must get this lot cut.’ Tatiana wound strands of hair round her finger, pinning them flat to her head. ‘Yours suits you short, Kitty.’

‘Mm. Easy to look after, too. When you’re out on the road there never seems to be a hairdresser around.’

‘That’s because a lot of them have been called up,’ Tatiana laughed. ‘Shampooing hair isn’t regarded as war work exactly!’

‘Guess you’re right.’ Sighing deeply, Kitty lay back on her bed, hands behind head. ‘We’re going to Norfolk tomorrow, doing a show for the Air Force, there. Then after that we’ll be in Scotland. Some godforsaken place called Scapa.’

‘Scapa Flow. We’ve got a lot of ships, there.’

‘But not a minesweeper called HMS Penrose. Oh heck, Tatty! I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have said that. I’ve been trying like mad not to mention Drew. You know I wouldn’t hurt you for all the world, don’t you?’

‘I know. And, Kitty – I want you to talk about Drew. I don’t know how you can not talk about him. I used to talk to Daisy and Gracie all the time about Tim. They’d alibi me so I could meet him, you see.’

‘Y’mean you never took Tim home? Why ever not?’

‘Because Mother was like that. I suppose it’s the Russian in her; overprotective. And as for the Petrovska! Well, only a Romanov would have been good enough for me – if they’d never left St Petersburg, that is, and if that rabble hadn’t murdered the Czar-God-rest-him.’ She crossed herself devoutly, fluttering her eyelids, mimicking her grandmother. ‘But I wanted Tim the minute I saw him.’

‘Guess it was like that for Drew and me too. We’d grown up together – well, twice a year together, kind of – and then, after five years we meet at a crummy dockyard concert and Wham! Both of us! Suppose I realized it first. Drew was mad at me for showing too much. But what the heck – I was wearing a borrowed costume!

‘Guess there was a lot of me oozing out,’ she giggled, ‘but the other sailors just loved it! Drew was real mad at me, though, and said I was common, so I said I was sorry and all at once it came right.’

‘And was it marvellous, like for me and Tim?’

‘We-e-ll, Drew was a bit sniffy, but it was only because he didn’t like those sailors ogling me. In the end we went back to my digs. That was when we decided we’d fallen in love.’

‘And you stayed together all night?’

‘All night!’

‘Wish Tim and me could have.’

‘Poor Tatty. You never – not once?’

‘Yes, but not all night. I told him I loved him, but in Russian at first. Then we got to talking about me being too young to marry him and him thinking he mightn’t live long enough to wait for me – tail-gunners take a lot of flack, you know. Anyway, we decided it was going to happen between us and Tim said that when it did I wasn’t to worry. I wouldn’t have cared if I’d got pregnant though I suppose now it’s best I didn’t. When Tim was – was killed, my period was five days late, but it didn’t seem to register. I was too numb.’

‘You’d have been just fine, Tatty. The Clan would’ve stood by you.’

‘I know that. But imagine Mother trying to hide the shame of it in Holdenby – and as for Grandmother Petrovska! She’d have had me whipped! But Aunt Julia and Uncle Nathan would have been all right about it – I know they would. And I could have kept the baby. Grandfather Sutton left me Denniston House and some money, too.’

‘We were all very sad about Grandfather. When Aunt Julia wrote to tell us we just couldn’t believe it. Not so suddenly and cruelly, I mean. And we couldn’t get across for the funeral either. Pa was real cut up about it.’

‘Tim died the same night; probably about the same time, though it wasn’t Tim’s bomber that crashed on the village. It came down on the pike. I wish I knew how to ill-wish, Kitty. Those German pilots who shot up the aerodrome that night would be dead now if I could do it. D’you think I’m peculiar?’

‘Of course I don’t!’

‘The Petrovska thinks I am. She doesn’t like my Englishness. Uncle Igor is the better for knowing, though. We’ve got quite close lately. He told me things …’

‘What things?’ Kitty’s eyes sparked.

‘Oh, nothing like that !’ If only I could tell you, Kitty. If only I could tell anyone! ‘He told me things about living in St Petersburg before the revolution and the way life used to be for the rich. Sometimes I’m glad the Bolsheviks kicked them out!’

‘I reckon they call them Commies now,’ Kitty offered.

‘I know. But she still calls them Bolsheviks; the rabble, the great unwashed! I’m glad my mother married an Englishman, even though she wasn’t happy with him.’

‘She wasn’t?’ Kitty breathed. ‘Ooooh! Do tell.’

‘No! I mean – there’s nothing to tell. Not actually.’ Hell, she’d nearly let it slip! ‘What I meant was that she must have been unhappy, starting four babies and only me living. And it must have been awful, having Grandmother Clementina for a mother-in-law.’ Her cheeks burned. She must watch her tongue, in future! ‘But I don’t want to talk about them. Let’s talk about us and how glad I am you’re here, Kitty. It’s a shame you won’t be able to meet my airmen just yet.’