Robin Talley - As I Descended

Praise for Robin Talley

‘The main characters are terrific in what is a moving YA novel.And an important one’ – The Daily Telegraph

‘This is so thought-provokingit almost hurts to read it, yet every word is needed, is necessary and consequently this is a novel that lingers long after you’ve finished it’ – Lovereading

‘This is an emotional and compellingread that I did not want to put down. It is […] beautifully writtenand the tension just simmers on the pages’ – Bookbabblers

‘This book packs a very powerful punch’ – Historical Novel Society

‘With great characterisation, tough issues covered, and a plot which had me guessing right up until the last pages, this is a must-read. Massively recommended!’ – The Bookbag

‘This exceptional novelof first love and sexual awakenings is set against a backdrop of shocking racism and prejudice. It is incredibly well writtenas the tense, riveting story seamlessly combines fiction with historical fact’ – Booktrust

‘Every now and then a Young Adult book comes along that I want to push into every reader’s hands both young and oldand Lies We Tell Ourselves is that book for 2014’ – Jess Hearts Books

‘Talley has mixed two controversial topics together to create a firecracker of a story’ – Cheryl M-M’s Book Blog

Winner of the Amnesty CILIP Honour Award 2016 for Lies We Tell Ourselves.

ROBIN TALLEY’Sfirst novel, Lies We Tell Ourselves, about two girls on the front lines of the school desegregation battle in 1959 Virginia, was on the short list for the CILIP Carnegie Medal and a finalist for the Lambda Literary Award.

Robin lives in Washington, D.C., with her wife and their daughter, plus an antisocial cat and a goofy hound dog. You can find her on the web at www.robintalley.comor on Twitter at @robin_talley.

Contents

Cover

Praise Praise for Robin Talley ‘The main characters are terrific in what is a moving YA novel. And an important one’ – The Daily Telegraph ‘This is so thought-provoking it almost hurts to read it, yet every word is needed, is necessary and consequently this is a novel that lingers long after you’ve finished it ’ – Lovereading ‘This is an emotional and compelling read that I did not want to put down. It is […] beautifully written and the tension just simmers on the pages’ – Bookbabblers ‘This book packs a very powerful punch ’ – Historical Novel Society ‘With great characterisation, tough issues covered, and a plot which had me guessing right up until the last pages, this is a must-read. Massively recommended! ’ – The Bookbag ‘This exceptional novel of first love and sexual awakenings is set against a backdrop of shocking racism and prejudice. It is incredibly well written as the tense, riveting story seamlessly combines fiction with historical fact’ – Booktrust ‘Every now and then a Young Adult book comes along that I want to push into every reader’s hands both young and old and Lies We Tell Ourselves is that book for 2014’ – Jess Hearts Books ‘Talley has mixed two controversial topics together to create a firecracker of a story’ – Cheryl M-M’s Book Blog Winner of the Amnesty CILIP Honour Award 2016 for Lies We Tell Ourselves.

About the Author ROBIN TALLEY’S first novel, Lies We Tell Ourselves, about two girls on the front lines of the school desegregation battle in 1959 Virginia, was on the short list for the CILIP Carnegie Medal and a finalist for the Lambda Literary Award. Robin lives in Washington, D.C., with her wife and their daughter, plus an antisocial cat and a goofy hound dog. You can find her on the web at www.robintalley.com or on Twitter at @robin_talley .

Title Page

ACT 1: in thunder ACT 1 in thunder

1. THE CHARM’S WOUND UP

2. NOTHING IS BUT WHAT IS NOT

3. HOURS DREADFUL AND THINGS STRANGE

4. LEAVE ALL THE REST TO ME

ACT 2: in lightning

5. CAN THE DEVIL SPEAK TRUE?

6. THE ATTEMPT AND NOT THE DEED CONFOUNDS US

7. PRESENT FEARS ARE LESS THAN HORRIBLE IMAGININGS

8. SLEEP NO MORE

9. A THING MOST STRANGE AND CERTAIN

ACT 3: in rain

10. I FEAR YOU PLAYED MOST FOULLY FOR IT

11. BLOOD WILL HAVE BLOOD

12. WHAT’S TO BE DONE?

13. CONSIDER IT NOT SO DEEPLY

14. TERRIBLE DREAMS THAT SHAKE US NIGHTLY

15. THE VERY PAINTING OF YOUR FEAR

ACT 4: when the hurly-hurly’s done

16. FOUL WHISPERINGS ARE ABROAD

17. COME LIKE SHADOWS, SO DEPART

18. THEN THE CHARM IS FIRM AND GOOD

ACT 5: when the battle’s lost and won

19. HERE’S THE SMELL OF THE BLOOD STILL

20. WHAT’S DONE CANNOT BE UNDONE

21. SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES

22. FAIR IS FOUL, AND FOUL IS FAIR

Epilogue: TOMORROW AND TOMORROW AND TOMORROW

Acknowledgments

Copyright

ACT 1

in thunder

1

THE CHARM’S WOUND UP

The Ouija board was Lily’s idea.

Maria warned her not to go through with it, but Lily didn’t listen. She went onto eBay while Maria was at soccer practice and bought the prettiest board she could find. A “genuine antique,” she called it.

Only when she showed it to Maria and Brandon that night she pronounced it “gen-you-wine,” showing off the Southern drawl everyone teased her for. Soon after that they opened the bottle of cheap white wine left over from Delilah’s eighteenth birthday party, and every five minutes either Brandon or Maria would utter the words “gen-you-wine an-TEEK!” and collapse into giggles.

Lily pretended to take offense the first few times, but by her last Styrofoam cup of Chardonnay Lily was adding an extra I to every word she said. “Sit” became “See-it.” “Drink” was “dreeenk.” When she started calling Maria “Mariah,” like Mariah Carey, Brandon confiscated her cup.

Maria had been worried about Lily all day. She wasn’t normally this loud, or this giggly. And Lily never drank—she didn’t even like to take her painkillers. Normally she sat at the edge of the party sipping seltzer and watching their friends with her hawk eyes to make sure no one spilled anything on their plush dorm-room carpet.

Part of Maria wanted to declare the evening over, escort Lily back to their room, put her in bed, and keep an eye on her for the rest of the night to make sure she didn’t do anything else out of the ordinary.

But Maria couldn’t focus on Lily right now. Not with that Ouija board sitting next to her.

This board was the real deal. Maria could feel it. It wasn’t any of that plastic Milton Bradley crap. This board meant business.

It was after lights-out in the dorm, so the three of them kept their laughter to whispers. Everyone was supposed to be in their rooms tucked into bed by ten p.m. if they didn’t want to get written up by one of the dorm monitors who prowled the halls.

None of the staff ever checked the old dining hall, though. Most of the students never ventured here after dark. There were rumors about the room. Scary stories the younger kids whispered about at sleepovers.

Maria had seen enough to know those kinds of stories were usually bullshit. The truth was a lot scarier than anything little kids could imagine.

But Lily had thought the old dining hall was the perfect place for their first séance, and Maria had given up arguing about it. Lily was smart—smarter than Maria; they’d both known that much from the beginning—but she didn’t know the first thing about what that Ouija board could do. She’d begged, though, and begged some more, and she’d smiled sweetly and said pretty things, and finally, Maria had given in.