Michelle Madow - Diamonds in the Rough

“I’ve never seen it,” she said. “Well, I’ve heard of it, but I don’t know much about it. I never used to have time for TV.” She glanced out the window and reminded herself why she was there: to ask him about whatever had happened between him and Madison.

But he spoke again before she had a chance.

“I have all the seasons on DVD. Now that you have more free time, we could marathon them from the beginning.”

Her breath caught. Was he asking her as a date? Or as friends? Either way, marathon watching any show with Brett would be a bad idea. That would mean being alone with him for hours, and she couldn’t trust herself to repress her feelings for him for that long.

She glanced at the corpse monster on-screen again and cringed. “It looks…violent. And gruesome.”

“It definitely can be.” He picked up the remote and powered off the TV. “But it’s not bad when you remind yourself that it’s makeup and effects. Plus, even though it’s set in the zombie apocalypse, the essence of the show is about humanity—­how people adapt and react in extreme situations, having to work together to survive with people they would have never encountered in their normal lives.”

“It sounds like some of the dystopian books I read,” Courtney said.

His eyes glinted with amusement. “So you don’t have time for TV, but you do have time for reading?”

“Always.” Courtney lowered her hands from the straps of her bag. “I borrowed books from the library at school so often that the librarian knew me by name. I can’t fall asleep at night without reading at least a chapter, but I usually read more. And while I know I shouldn’t, I sometimes read before doing my homework, to recenter my mind so I can focus.”

“That’s why I watch an episode of a TV show when I get home from school.” Brett’s voice rose, sounding so excited that they had this small thing in common. “But I should read more. Whenever I read a book, I usually enjoy it. But there are so many movies and television series I want to watch that I’ll never have time for them all in my lifetime, so I go to those first.”

“That’s how I feel about books.” Courtney smiled. “It’s why I never read a book more than once—because the time spent rereading one book is one less new story I’ll be exposed to in my life.”

Suddenly Courtney realized she’d gotten off track from the reason she’d dropped by. “Anyway.” She played with her hands, hating the turn this conversation was about to take. “I talked to Madison at the student tutoring meeting.”

“Oh.” Brett’s face fell. “I didn’t know you two were friends.”

“We’re not.” Her voice shook at how she’d clearly struck a nerve. “She happened to be there early, like me, and she…mentioned you.”

“What about me?” He ran his hands through his hair, his eyes not meeting hers. She’d wanted to believe Madison was exaggerating, but after seeing Brett’s reaction to the mere fact that Madison had talked to Courtney, she wasn’t so sure.

“She told me she tutored you last year.” Feeling shaky again, Courtney walked to the sofa and perched on the arm, dropping her bag on the floor. “In bio.”

He joined her on the couch, keeping space between them, and took a few seconds to respond. “She did,” he finally said. “I was behind in bio since I’d transferred into Goodman from public school, so I went to the tutoring center for help. Madison was the tutor assigned to me.”

“Okay.” Courtney forced herself to sound distant and detached—there was no other way for her to continue without risking losing control of her emotions. “She hinted that more went on between you than tutoring. That you were…involved. Over the summer.”

Brett looked down, and Courtney’s heart dropped. “It only happened once.”

She reeled back, the thought of Brett and Madison together making her blood boil. How could she have not known about this until now?

“But it was before I met you,” he said, his eyes blazing with intensity. “The night it happened, Madison and I both had too much to drink, and we kissed. It didn’t go further than that, but she wanted it to. Afterward I told her it would never happen again. She refused to listen, but then I met you, and she finally got the message that nothing was ever going to happen with me and her.” He scooted closer, and as much as Courtney knew she should put distance between them, his eyes pinned her in place. “Because after I met you, I knew you were the one for me. I’ve known it every day since. You’re smart, caring, selfless, kind, understanding, and I can talk with you for hours. You’re beautiful inside and out. No one else has ever come close to comparing to you, and to be honest, I’m not sure anyone ever will.”

His words sent her head spinning and her heart racing—they were everything Courtney wanted to hear. She couldn’t imagine anyone ever comparing to him, either.

But if they were meant to be together, why would fate have made it so they were about to be step-siblings? If she gave in to Brett and was with him in secret, it would eventually come out. Then she’d be a disappointment to Adrian and Rebecca, just like, for reasons she’d never known, she’d always been a disappointment to her mother. The only person who appreciated her for her, who had no expectations for her to be perfect, was Grandma. She touched the key necklace Grandma had given her for her birthday last year, hoping it would give her strength.

No matter what she did, she and those she cared for would end up hurt. So she fought the war waging inside her and focused on the one thing Brett had said that she found truly shocking.

“Madison Lockhart wanted to sleep with you, and you turned her down?”

Brett’s eyes dimmed. “I just poured my heart out to you, and that’s how you reply?”

“I’m sorry.” Courtney bit her lip, hating how disappointed he sounded. “I do care about you, Brett. But we’ve already been through this—we can’t be more than friends. Although I am glad to hear that you turned Madison down. I don’t think most guys would have done that.”

He watched her closely, but something in her eyes must have warned him not to push her any further. “I guess I’ll take that as a compliment,” he said. “But I don’t think Madison wanted to sleep with me. She’s a virgin. I think she wanted a relationship, but she wouldn’t even say hi to me in front of her stuck-up friends, so I told her I wasn’t interested. We haven’t talked in weeks, and I still don’t know why she fixated on me in the first place. Maybe because I don’t worship her like most guys at school do.”

“Madison’s a virgin?” Courtney didn’t like to gossip, but talking about Madison was a distraction from her own emotions. “No way.”

“Yeah.” Brett shrugged. “Guys are always joking about what they would give to be her first. I don’t know what Madison hinted to you, but we only kissed once. If I’d already met you, it never would have happened.”

Courtney’s heart flipped at his confession, and every muscle in her body begged her to crush her lips against his, to feel his arms around her and to tell him to never let go. But then she would be a goner. And her ultimate decision would still be the same, so she would only be hurting both of them.

She stood from the sofa and grabbed her bag. “Thanks for being honest with me,” she said, surprising herself by how level­headed she sounded, when inside her emotions were tearing her to pieces. “You didn’t have to tell me anything, since we’re not dating, but I appreciate it. And I’m sorry we can’t see where anything goes between us. I wouldn’t blame you if you started avoiding me again. It might make all this easier….”