Sandra Panting - About Last Summer

As he moved from room to room his mind created images of them sitting down to a meal, or relaxing in front of the fireplace. And his imagination didn’t stop there. Upstairs they would make love in the large master suite with a shower that was adequate enough for two. And then his mind would creep towards the future, and he would find himself thinking about the best place to put a swing seat, or which room would make the best nursery.

He didn’t know what had brought on such fanciful thinking. The making love thoughts were basically a given when he thought about Natalie, but starting a family with her? Was he out of his mind? But despite his misgivings the thoughts continued, and if he and Natalie were to start spending time together again, putting this house on the market would eliminate his only remaining option.

He should have his head examined for even entertaining such thoughts.

Feeling a familiar weight tighten in his chest, he paused to glance out of the window. The fading daylight illuminated the partially done landscaping, but his mind wasn’t on the amount of work remaining. Over the past few days he’d noticed Natalie was avoiding him.

Granted things had gotten a bit out of hand during their ‘date’, and it would have been way too easy for him to take her up on her offer. And he was certain she knew it otherwise why would she be avoiding him? The problem was whenever they were alone keeping their hands off each other had always been a challenge. Evidently, it still was. He should be grateful she suddenly had a million things to tend to outside the house. Not that she was fooling him any, but as long as Patrick didn’t catch on, he supposed it didn’t matter.

Dropping his arm, he stepped away from the window. He shouldn’t be thinking about Natalie. Thinking about her led to wanting things he knew he couldn’t have. But unfortunately Natalie wasn’t his only problem.

In another few weeks he would be returning to New York and the mere thought filled him with dread. When he left Baker Hill last year he thought Natalie would become just another fond memory, but that hadn’t happened. So he worked harder, but it didn’t help. He thought he had the life he wanted, but now that life held little appeal.

A few times he’d toyed with the idea of talking to Natalie about a more permanent relationship, but he refrained. The Malone men had a long history of bad relationships. They seemed to possess the ability to screw up every relationship they had, and Chase’s luck with women wasn’t much better.

He once thought his luck had changed, but when his marriage ended without warning after a scant three years that put an end to that theory. He still didn’t understand what went wrong, and until he did he wasn’t about to attempt another relationship. And if truth be told, he may never attempt another relationship regardless.

Weary of chasing the same thoughts, he decided to head back to Patrick’s. Natalie had an anniversary party to attend, but maybe Patrick would be around to provide him with some distraction.

Pulling into Patrick’s drive, Chase’s heart sunk when he spotted Natalie’s car and not Patrick’s. Briefly, he debated about going somewhere else, but he decided against it. He could control his desire around Natalie. Hadn’t he done just that the other night? Besides he had no choice but to control himself; he had no idea when Patrick would be home.

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