Nina Harrington - Her Sweet Surrender - The First Crush Is the Deepest

The contrast to the tiny beachside orphanage in Kerala where Parvita was celebrating her wedding could not be greater.

The seaside village where the girls’ orphanage was based had running water and electricity—most of the time.

She would love to go back and see them again. One day. When she was not so terrified of catching another life-threatening infection.

A cold shiver ran across Amber’s shoulders and she pulled her cashmere tighter across the front of her chest.

Heath and her mother were right about one thing. As always. Even if she wasn’t scared, she could raise more income for the orphanage by staying in London or Boston or Miami and fund-raising than risk returning to Kerala, where she had caught meningitis only a few months earlier.

Now all she had to do was come up with a way of doing precisely that.

Not by playing the piano. That was for sure.

No matter how much her mother nagged her to reconsider and plan a comeback concert tour. A year ago she might have gone along with it and started rigorous training but that part of her life was over now.

Wiped away by meningitis and a few months of enforced bed rest when she had to ask some hard questions about the life she was living and how she intended to spend it in the future.

Amber closed her eyes and inhaled and exhaled slowly a couple of times. No going back, girl. No going back. Only forward. This was her new start. Her new beginning.

The sun was warm on her face and when she opened her eyes the first thing she saw was the braided cord bracelet that Parvita had made and woven onto her right wrist that last day she was at the orphanage.

She was so lucky.

Heath and her mother loved her and that was what she had to focus on. Not their nagging. She would go back to Boston and start work with the fund-raising committee for Parvita. Benefit concerts were always popular and between her mother and their network of professional musicians they could pull together some top name soloists who could raise thousands for the charity.

This was her chance to do something remarkable. And she was going to grab hold of it with both hands and cling on tight, no matter how bumpy the road ahead was.

First hurdle? Talking to Sam.

Amber glanced at her wristwatch and a fluttering sensation of apprehension blended with excitement bubbled up from deep inside. In another place and time she might have said that the thought of seeing him again face to face was making her nervous. That was totally ridiculous. This was her space and he was here to help her out, as he had promised.

This was not the time to get stage fright.

She was an idiot.

They had agreed to make a trade. His time in exchange for one interview. Nothing more. What else could there be?

Her thoughts were interrupted by a petite bundle of energy.

‘One good thing came out of that whole school reunion fiasco.’ Kate laughed and threw her arms around Amber’s waist. ‘The three of us haven’t been in the same city at the same time for far too many years. And that is a disgrace. So all hail school reunions.’

Amber laughed out loud and stepped back to clink her mug of coffee against Kate’s. ‘With you on that. I still cannot believe that it’s the middle of May already. April was just a blur.’

Kate groaned and slumped into the patio chair facing Amber. ‘Tell me about it. London might be suffering from the economic recession but bespoke tailoring is booming and I have never been so busy. It’s great. Really great. But wow, is it exhausting.’

‘Well, here is something to keep you going.’ Saskia Elwood came out from Amber’s penthouse apartment with a tray of the most delicious-looking bite-sized snacks, which she wafted in front of Amber. ‘Test samples for your birthday party. I need you to taste them all and tell me which ones you like best.’

Kate half rose out of her chair. ‘Hey, don’t I get to try them too? I could scoff the lot. And breakfast was hours ago.’

‘You’re next but the birthday girl has first pick. Besides, she needs fattening up a bit. What did they feed you in that hospital, anyway? I can’t have you coming to my dining room looking all pale and scrawny.’

Amber munched away on a mini disc of bacon and herb pizza and made humming sounds of appreciation before speaking between bites. ‘No appetite. It was so hot and I was asleep most of the time. And the food certainly wasn’t as good as this. These are fantastic.’

‘Thought you would like it and there are lots more to come. So tuck in.’

Kate snatched a tiny prawn mayo sandwich and chewed it down in one huge bite before sighing in pleasure. ‘Oh, that is so good. Amber DuBois, it was a genius idea to have your birthday party at Saskia’s house.’

‘It was the very least I could do. Ten years is a long time and all three of us have come a long way,’ Amber replied and raised her coffee as a toast. ‘I missed you both so much. To the goddesses.’

‘The goddesses,’ Kate and Saskia echoed and all three of them settled back in their chairs in the sunshine with the tray of snacks between them, hot Italian blend coffee and the sound of the city way below to break up the contented sighs.

‘So what have you been up to, Amber?’ Saskia asked, her eyes shielded with a hand as she nibbled on a fresh cream profiterole drizzled with chocolate sauce. ‘It must get you down when you’re unable to practise for hours like you usually do.’

Amber waved her right arm in the air and turned the plaster cast covering her wrist from side to side. ‘Frustrating more than anything, but the exercises are keeping my fingers working and I have to get used to being one handed for a few more weeks. Only that isn’t the problem. There is something missing and somehow...’ Then she gave a chuckle and shook her head. ‘Oh, ignore me. I’m just being silly.’

‘Oh, no, you don’t,’ Saskia said in a low voice. ‘We can tell that there is something bothering you. And you know that we’re not going to let it drop until you tell us what the problem is. So come on. Spill. Out with it.’

Amber focused her gaze on the terrace. Bright flowering plants and conifers spilled out of colourful planters in front of a panoramic view across the London city skyline.

‘Yesterday I was feeling down in the dumps so I pulled out my favourite music scores. If I have a spare hour or two on tour I can usually visualise the performance in my head and it is the one thing that is always guaranteed to cheer me up and have me bouncing with excitement.’

She paused and sighed low and slow. ‘But not this time. I didn’t feel a thing. There was nothing that made me want to tear off this plaster cast and play. Seriously. It’s as though all of my passion for the music has gone out of the window.’

She paused and looked from Saskia to Kate and then back to Saskia again. ‘And that’s scary, girls. I don’t know how to do anything else.’

The silence echoed between the three of them before Kate put her mug down on the metal mesh table with a dramatic thud.

‘Amber? Sweetie? It might have something to do with the fact that you have just spent months in hospital recovering from the infection you caught in India. And yes, I know that it is still our secret. We won’t tell anyone. But you have to give yourself time to recover and get your mojo back. Maybe even be kind to yourself and let your body heal, instead of running from place to place at top speed. How about that for a crazy idea?’

Amber blew out long and slow. ‘You’re right. This is the first time in years that I have been in London long enough to take stock. I just feel that I am lost and drifting on my own. Again.’

Saskia slid over to the end of Amber’s lounger and wrapped her fingers around her arm. ‘No, you’re not. You will always have a home at Elwood House. And don’t you dare forget that.’