Christie Barlow - Love Heart Lane

‘Any news on the school?’ asked Isla, noticing Jessica, Finn’s teacher, chatting to Rory.

Felicity looked up, Jessica was the woman who’d brought Esme into the pub.

‘Not only is Jessica stranded in the village due to the weather, she’s just announced the school is closed until further notice. She’s had to rent a room with Julia at the B&B. There’s no way she can drive her car down the track and over the bridge.’ Drew placed his hand in the small of his wife’s back. ‘Which means Finn is going to be home from tomorrow but I promise I’ll help out as much as I can.’

There was no hiding Isla’s sigh, she barely had the energy to put on her own socks never mind entertain a six-year-old.

‘Normally, I wouldn’t mind. I enjoy him being home but it’s just a little tiring at the moment waiting for this one to make an appearance.’ She patted her stomach and felt a kick. ‘He’s being a little live wire tonight.’

‘I can help out while I’m here. I had visions of me working in the teashop to pass some time but…’

‘Give your mum some time, it’s been difficult,’ interrupted Isla. ‘And thank you, I’d love to see as much of you as possible whilst your back.’ Isla smiled at Felicity, meaning every word.

Their conversation was interrupted by the sound of Hamish raising his voice, ‘If anyone would like to volunteer…’ He looked hopefully at the crowd of people.

No one answered.

‘You can’t all stand here demanding to know how I’ll allocate my produce when no one is willing to help.’ He sounded exasperated.

Felicity stood up and wandered over to the crowd. ‘What is it you need Hamish?’

‘I need another pair of hands. Firstly, we need to concentrate on the perishable goods and make sure it doesn’t go to waste and then we need to come up with a plan for the rest of the stock.’

Felicity determinedly stepped forward. ‘I’ll help you with that, no problem.’ Felicity knew that with her own experience at work, she could easily scan through the stock lists and share out the food as fairly as possible. ‘I’ve got time on my hands while I’m home.’

Hamish’s face lit up. ‘Felicity Simons, are you serious?’

‘Deadly serious.’

‘You are a gem.’ He beamed, looking like a huge weight had lifted from his shoulders.

‘What time do you want me in the morning?’

‘Eight o’clock?’

‘Eight o’clock it is.’ She smiled at Hamish before noticing the proud smile on her mum’s face. ‘Can I make a small suggestion?’

‘Of course,’ answered Hamish, waiting to hear what Felicity had to say.

‘Priority food maybe needs to go to the care home first, the elderly.’

‘Indeed, we can draw up a list and hopefully the next truck will be able to get through as soon as the snow thaws.’

Everyone agreed, and Felicity joined Isla back at the table.

‘Look at you,’ grinned Isla as Felicity sat back down opposite her. ‘Back in Heartcross two minutes and taking control. Hamish will never want to let you go if you can keep that lot in order.’

‘Well, someone had to step in. Otherwise those perishable goods would be even more perishable by the time they sorted themselves out.’

Isla tried to laugh but her face paled. She clutched her stomach before letting out a tiny groan.

‘What is it?’

‘How are you at delivering babies?’ She sucked in a breath and grimaced.

Instantly, Felicity felt her eyes well up with tears and swallowed down the lump in her throat. Her body surged with emotions she’d managed to keep locked away for a very long time, taking her by complete surprise. The guilt always hit first, wondering if she could have done something different – was the miscarriage down to her, could she have done anything else? The sense of loss never left her.

Isla noticed the colour had drained from Felicity’s face.

‘Oh my gosh, Flick, I’m so sorry, I really wasn’t thinking,’ said Isla, immediately reaching over the table and squeezing her hand.

‘It’s okay, really it is,’ Felicity replied, her voice shaky. ‘Shall I get Drew or even Rory?’

‘Rory … he’s a vet!’ Isla laughed, trying to lighten the mood but still clutching her stomach tightly.

‘It’s got to be the same difference, delivery of a baby or a lamb,’ smiled Felicity.

‘Luckily for everyone it’s those Braxton Hicks, nothing to worry about. I’m sorry Flick, I really didn’t mean to upset you.’

‘I know you didn’t. And I can’t hide myself away from every pregnant woman I see,’ said Felicity, even though she knew for a very long time she hadn’t been able to even look at a pregnant woman.

‘Are you going to try and talk to Fergus while you’re back?’

‘Aggie’s already warned me off him.’

Isla rolled her eyes, ‘She’s been under the weather recently; she’s got this cough that she can’t shift so her mood is probably not the best, but you know Aggie from old … her bark’s worse than her bite. Your reasons for leaving were about you. You were grieving and had to do what you needed to do. No one should judge you for it.’

Felicity was grateful that Isla understood.

‘Aggie doesn’t see it like that.’

‘She didn’t like to see her boy hurt but it still doesn’t give her the right to treat you with a lack of respect. You both went through a difficult time. Time moves on, people move on.’

‘Fergus has moved on,’ added Felicity, glancing in Esme’s direction.

Isla followed her gaze. ‘She’s a wonderful little girl, beautiful inside and out. You’ll like her.’

‘Fergus can’t even bear to look at me.’

‘He will, give it time. It’s the first time he’s set eyes on you since then. Even though I do know you’ve sneaked back a few times without seeing any of us.’ Isla tutted playfully.

‘I am sorry about that,’ said Felicity regretfully.

‘It’s okay, honestly it is. There were a few people that were hurt when you upped and left including me and Allie but we knew why. We knew you needed space, we just didn’t think it would be eight years of space.’

‘Time drifted on but I don’t think Allie will be as forgiving as you.’ Felicity blew out a breath and glanced in her direction. She was standing by the bar laughing with Rory but caught her eye for a split second.

‘We both know Allie from old, strong willed, stubborn but whatever she says, she’s missed you like crazy. We all have. Grief is real and however long you needed, your crazy friends are still here. She’ll come round …we haven’t gone anywhere.’

For a time, Felicity’s life had descended into complete darkness. It had taken awhile but she had come a long way over the last eight years. Felicity’s eyes glistened with tears as she felt an overwhelming feeling of love and belonging for her old village. She smiled across the table at her friend knowing that she had missed this place more than she wanted to admit. Everything felt right and familiar.

‘Promise me one thing, Isla.’

‘Go on,’ Isla met her gaze.

‘Just try and hold that baby in until we can get across the bridge and drive you to the hospital.’

‘I’ll try my very best for you. And I’m glad you’ve come home, I for one have really missed you.’

Felicity squeezed Isla’s hand. She knew she had a few bridges to mend but having Isla back on her side gave her an overwhelming feeling of warmth. She’d missed Isla too.

Felicity was up at the crack of dawn, woken by the chill in the air. She shivered and pulled the duvet up tight around her neck but it was no use, she couldn’t get warm. Her feet felt like blocks of ice and her teeth were chattering. How could her mum live like this? She tossed and turned but it was no use, she couldn’t get back to sleep. Slipping her socks onto her feet and a jumper over her head, she padded quietly downstairs in need of a warm drink. Everywhere was in complete darkness and Felicity looked up at the clock; it was only 6.30 a.m.