Published by AVON
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First published in Great Britain by HarperCollins Publishers 2019
Copyright © Sophie Draper 2019
Cover design by Lisa Horton © HarperCollins Publishers Ltd 2019
Cover photographs © Stephen Mulcahey/Trevillion Images (house and woman); Silas Manhood/Arcangel Images (fence); Shutterstock.com (sky, magpie, water, grass)
Sophie Draper asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.
A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library.
This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.
Source ISBN: 9780008311315
Ebook Edition © November 2019 ISBN: 9780008311322
Version: 2019-10-15
For my boys.
One for sorrow,
Two for joy,
Three for a girl,
Four for a boy,
Five for silver,
Six for gold,
Seven for a secret,
Never to be told.
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Epigraph
Chapter 1: Claire – Before
Chapter 2: Claire – Before
Chapter 3: Duncan – Six Weeks After
Chapter 4: Claire – Before
Chapter 5: Claire – After
Chapter 6: Claire – Before
Chapter 7: Claire – After
Chapter 8: Duncan – After
Chapter 9: Claire – Before
Chapter 10: Claire – Before
Chapter 11: Duncan – After
Chapter 12: Duncan – After
Chapter 13: Claire – Before
Chapter 14: Claire – Before
Chapter 15: Claire – After
Chapter 16: Duncan – After
Chapter 17: Claire – Before
Chapter 18: Claire – Before
Chapter 19: Claire – After
Chapter 20: Duncan – After
Chapter 21: Claire – After
Chapter 22: Duncan – After
Chapter 23: Claire – Before
Chapter 24: Claire – Before
Chapter 25: Claire – After
Chapter 26: Claire – After
Chapter 27: Claire – Before
Chapter 28: Claire – After
Chapter 29: Duncan – After
Chapter 30: Claire – After
Chapter 31: Claire – Before
Chapter 32: Claire – After
Chapter 33: Claire – Before
Chapter 34: Claire – Before
Chapter 35: Claire – After
Chapter 36: Duncan – After
Chapter 37: Claire – Before
Chapter 38: Claire – Before
Chapter 39: Claire – After
Chapter 40: Duncan – After
Chapter 41: Claire – Before
Chapter 42: Claire – After
Chapter 43: Claire – Before
Chapter 44: Claire – Before
Chapter 45: Claire – Before
Chapter 46: Duncan – After
Chapter 47: Claire – After
Chapter 48: Claire – After
Chapter 49: Claire – Before
Chapter 50: Duncan – After
Chapter 51: Claire – Before
Chapter 52: Claire – Before
Chapter 53: Claire – After
Chapter 54: Claire – Before
Chapter 55: Duncan – After
Chapter 56: Claire – Before
Chapter 57: Duncan – After
Chapter 58: Claire – After
Chapter 59: Claire – After
Chapter 60: Claire – After
Chapter 61: Duncan – 22 Years Before
Chapter 62: Duncan – After
Chapter 63: Claire – After
Chapter 64: Claire – After
Chapter 65: Duncan – After
Chapter 66: Duncan – After
Chapter 67: Claire – After
Chapter 68: Duncan – After
Chapter 69: Claire – After
Chapter 70: Claire – After
Chapter 71: Claire – After
Chapter 72: Duncan – After
Chapter 73: Claire – After
Chapter 74: Claire – After
Chapter 75: Duncan – After
Acknowledgements
Keep Reading …
About the Author
By the Same Author
About the Publisher
CHAPTER 1
CLAIRE – BEFORE
There’s a dog protesting from one of the cages on the ward. Pain, the animal’s in pain. Its cries cut across my thoughts and I turn away from Duncan’s consulting room, past Sally on reception and through the doors to the back of the building.
Imogen, the animal care assistant, is already there, doing her rounds. Her body is bent as she checks each animal. She reads the clipboards pegged to every cage and tops up food and water.
‘Is it the Great Dane again?’ I ask.
She nods, gesturing to the biggest enclosure. It’s out of sight by the stockroom and I turn the corner. The dog is on its feet, swaying from side to side, one back leg visibly shorter than the other. It lifts its head, jowls wet with saliva, pressing its cheek against the bars. Large brown eyes roll as it recognises a human face and it howls again, a long two-toned cry, setting off another sequence of barks and whimpers in the room.
I unhook the door, dropping to my knees. The Great Dane hobbles cautiously towards me. It easily matches me for height in this position, pushing against my body. I take the animal’s head into my arms.
‘Hey, there, big fella, how’re you doing?’
I shift my feet, holding one hand to the side of the dog’s head, the animal panting. Its eyes are dilated, its tongue hanging out, tasting the very smell of me. The dog tugs away, distrusting even the comfort of my body, yet drawn to me. Its oversized legs are partially splayed, its tail tight and stiff. I run my hands along the underside of its stomach, pausing in the middle before slowly rising up and along the back, approaching one hip. The animal lets out a moan and throws its head like a horse.
‘It’s okay, sweetheart, I know.’
I press with care, eyes watching the dog closely, pressing just enough to determine the exact spot and no more. The dog moans again and I let my hand drop.
‘Imogen.’ I raise my voice. ‘Can you come and help me here a moment?’
‘Coming!’
I hear the clatter of a metal bowl being set on the floor and Imogen appears, slightly out of breath.
‘What is it?’
‘How long has she been like this?’
‘Since I came in this morning.’
I frown. My hand reaches up to turn a page on the clipboard.
‘Has she eaten at all?’ I nod to the full bowl of dried food pellets.
‘She had some of the wet food last night, but none of the dried.’
‘But she’s drinking?’
The water bowl is full too, I note.
‘Claire – I’m not sure …’ Imogen looks at me uncertainly. Then: ‘Yes – I filled it only a few moments ago.’
‘Okay. It’s happened again – she’s dislocated her hip …’
‘Claire!’ It’s Duncan, my husband, striding round the corner.
He stops in front of us, lifting one hand to his smooth round head. He towers over me as I crouch on the floor and glares at me with barely concealed annoyance.
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