Ginna Gray - In Search Of Dreams

“I’m serious.”

“Have you lost your mind? Dammit, man, you’ve been with this paper for twelve years. You’ve built a name for yourself in this town. Why in God’s name would you throw away a successful career? Are you having a midlife crisis or something?”

“Maybe.” J.T. hesitated, not sure he wanted to explain his reasons. However, from his boss’s expression it was apparent that he wasn’t going to accept the resignation until he did.

“I want to write a novel. That’s what I’ve always wanted to do with my life, not be a reporter. When I took this job it was supposed to be temporary, but I got caught in a rut. Anyway, I have enough money put away to live comfortably for a few years, so I decided to give it a shot.”

“Oh, good night, nurse. Not another one,” Charlie muttered, rolling his eyes. “I’ve never met a reporter who didn’t think he had the next great American novel in him. I thought you were different. Shoulda known better.”

“Looks like it,” J.T. replied with his usual nonchalance, but his smile didn’t reach his eyes. Normally he was slow to anger, but Charlie’s derision touched off an uncharacteristic spurt of fury that he barely managed to hold in check.

Charlie slammed his hand down on his desk. “Do you know what the odds are of getting a book published? Particularly a novel? You’re living in a dream world.”

“Actually…I have an in. An old friend of mine is a vice president at Hubbard and Rhodes Publishing. He wants to see my manuscript when it’s finished. But that’s not the only reason I’m leaving. I also want to devote time to finding the rest of my family if I can.”

“Why, for Pete’s sake? I’d think after learning that that hard-nosed cop was your brother the last thing you’d want would be to go looking for another one. Hell, this one may turn out to be even more annoying.”

“Matt’s not so bad. Anyway, my missing sibling may be a sister.”

“Humph. That could be worse. I’ve got four of them. Take it from me, sisters are a real pain in the arse. They’re either driving you nuts with all their chatter and giggling and all that feminine clutter, or worrying you to death making eyes at boys. I spent half my twenties checking out the losers that came sniffing around my sisters.”

J.T. grinned, his good humor restored. He had a mental picture of Charlie protecting his sisters like a junkyard dog. They’d probably wanted to kill him for his efforts. “You may be right, but I have to try. If I don’t I’ll always wonder.”

For most of his life J.T. had known that he was adopted, but it hadn’t been until six weeks ago that he had made the startling discovery that he was one of a set of triplets, and that his old nemesis, Matthew Dolan, was actually his brother.

Until recently Matt had been a detective with the Houston Police Department. He and J.T. had been butting heads for the past twelve years whenever J.T. showed up at a crime scene to get the story.

Discovering that they were brothers had been a shock to both of them. At first neither he nor Matt had been ready to initiate a search for their missing triplet. Recently, however, J.T. had grown curious.

“How the devil do you expect to find this person, with nothing to go on except that he or she presumably has the missing third piece of a medallion and was adopted at age two? Talk about your needle in a haystack. It’s a waste of time.”

“Not necessarily. As a matter of fact, I already have a lead to check out.”

“Humph. So you’re determined to do this, are you?”

“Yep. I’ve put it off too long already.”

Charlie rolled his eyes and muttered another curse. “All right, fine. Do what you gotta do. But there’s no need for you to quit. Take a leave of absence.”

“I don’t—”

Charlie held up his hands. “Just hear me out. You take all the time you need. Go write your novel. Look for your other sibling. When you’re done and you find out you’re not Hemingway, then you come back here. Your job will be waiting.”

“Charlie—”

“No, I don’t want to hear it. I’m not going to let you throw away your career on a whim. Just go get all this nonsense out of your system once and for all, then come back here where you belong.”

J.T. was torn between exasperation and gratitude. It touched him that the cantankerous old coot thought enough of him to hold his job open, and it irritated the living hell out of him that he ridiculed his dream.

He held the older man’s gaze for several moments. What if Charlie was right? What if his talent didn’t go any deeper than knocking out sensationalized accounts of the news? It was a depressing thought—one he refused to accept.

J.T. wasn’t in any mood to argue, though, and he could see by Charlie’s bulldog expression that he wasn’t going to back down. Hell, why fight it? He could always resign later.

“Okay. You’ve got a deal,” J.T. finally said.

“There is just one condition.”

“Uh-oh, here it comes.”

“Aw, don’t get your shorts in a wad. I just want your promise that if you come across a good story you’ll call it in, that’s all.”

J.T. thought it over. Where he was heading, probably the most exciting thing that ever happened was an elk wandering into town now and then. “Sure. Why not?”

“Good. That’s settled. Now tell me, where’re you going?”

“Oh, no. Forget it. I know you, Charlie. If I tell you, you’ll be on the phone to me every day with an assignment, or wanting to know when I’m coming back.”

“So? What if I need you? What if an international crisis happens? What if World War III breaks out? How the hell am I supposed to get in touch with you?”

“You aren’t. Look, if it’ll make you feel better, I’ll check in now and then, but that’s it. Take it or leave it. Either way, in two weeks, I’m outta here.”

Cleaning out his desk and parting from his colleagues and friends was difficult, but for J.T. the hardest part of leaving was saying goodbye to Matt and Maude Ann and the kids.

Which was why he put off doing so until the last minute. When his belongings were in storage, all the last-minute details were handled and his laptop and the clothes he would need were loaded in the back of his Jeep Grand Cherokee, he drove north out of Houston to Lake Livingston.

J.T. knew that putting distance between himself and Matt at this point sure as hell wasn’t going to do much for their relationship. But then, he wondered if anything could.

Though they were brothers, a wall of reserve existed between him and Matt that neither of them seemed capable of breaching.

Perhaps it would always be there, J.T. mused. Maybe they had been separated too long to ever come together as brothers. They’d led different lives, had different upbringings, different outlooks. It saddened him to think so, but it was beginning to look as though it was too late for him and Matt to form any close fraternal ties. Certainly they had not gotten closer during the six weeks since they’d learned about their kinship.

It was a different story with his sister-in-law. He and Maude Ann had hit it off as friends from the moment they met, long before her marriage to Matt three weeks ago. He could talk to Maude Ann, laugh with her, tease her, tell her his hopes and dreams.

Of course, being a psychiatrist, she was trained to be a good listener and she had a sharp understanding of human nature, but there was more to it than that. He and Maudie were kindred souls. He was going to miss her like the devil. And he was going to miss the kids.

As he anticipated, Maude Ann was far more upset by his news than his brother. “You’re leaving? But why?” she asked in a stricken voice.

“I finally realized that I was feeling guilty about the compromises I’d made. So now I’m doing something about it.”