Catherine Miller - All That Is Left Of Us

Caitlin caught her arm to grab her attention. ‘We should get together once we’ve had our little ones. It’ll be like the old days although under very different circumstances.’

‘Erm…’ was all Dawn managed to squeeze out in way of protest. She wasn’t having a baby. She might be pregnant, but Junior wasn’t hers.

‘Here’s my card.’ Caitlin dished one out to her even though she hadn’t managed a full response.

Dawn took it. ‘That would be nice.’ She said it like she meant it, because, in truth, there was a part of her that missed her old friend. She’d not wanted to walk away from their friendship in the way she’d had to. If they did meet up she could explain about the surrogacy then, to save blowing Rebekah’s cover now. And maybe she would tell her about Archie.

‘Holy Mother of God. There was no way that was Braxton-Hicks,’ Caitlin said in a burst, grabbing the arm of the man she was with. ‘Fuck. You’ve done this before. How do you know when it’s actually started?’

Dawn hesitated in her answer. It would be a pretty cheap trick if it was a way of getting her to confess about the past, but there was no point in keeping it a secret if she already knew. ‘You know. And if you’re not sure, your body will let you know soon enough. So do you think you’re in labour?’

‘Yes, I knew it was more than backache, Karl,’ Caitlin chastised the man she was gripping tightly. From their wedding bands, Dawn guessed it must be her husband.

‘Maybe you should talk to Brian? He’ll be able to advise you.’ As there was a qualified midwife in the room, he seemed like the sensible person to turn to.

‘Get him over here,’ Caitlin yelped to her husband.

Karl, pale and silent, did exactly as Caitlin told him to. As Brian arrived, there was a pop followed by a gush. The shiny puddle that formed was the clearest confirmation they were going to get. Only the fluid from Caitlin’s waters wasn’t as clear as it should be.

Chapter 2

Owerdale Primary School was in the most picturesque setting possible. Owerdale itself was on the east edge of the New Forest with a steady and settled population that was bolstered by tourists during the sunnier months.

The school was part of the hub of Owerdale town, but it backed on to nothing more than the forest and required cattle grids to stop the New Forest ponies from trying to attend classes.

Having lived in Owerdale all her life, Dawn had attended the school herself as a youngster and it was fair to say not much had changed. Often it felt like she hadn’t either.

But the teaching assistant job she’d managed to get there was a blessing. It was perfect at a time when she needed to fit everything in with being Archie’s mum. He required more than the average parent would have to provide, which was why she never planned to have another. That was until it was someone else’s. Being the bearer of a baby rather than the owner didn’t seem too bad a prospect, especially when it meant helping David and Rebekah, the people who meant most to her.

Although, underneath that veneer of wanting to help, she also knew this might be the only chance she ever got to get out of this rut she was in. The school might be set in some of the best scenery possible, but that didn’t stop Dawn from wanting a change. To try and at long last start to make an income from her passion. Her artistic skills were getting a little lost on display boards no one was paying any attention to.

The staffroom Dawn was waiting in could have done with a display board or two. Empty, it was a cavernous cave of eerie calm. Dawn was so used to being here only at lunch times when it was bustling, the space seemed at odds with itself now it was just her.

‘Sorry, sorry, sorry,’ Jane said as she entered. Always apologising that one, even when she didn’t need to.

‘It’s okay. I didn’t mind waiting even if it is creepy in here when everyone else is in class.’

‘Yeah, looks kind of messy as well.’ The L-shaped staffroom was a sadly neglected space.

Dawn wasn’t going to miss it. The people, yes. Maybe even some of the pupils themselves, but not the place. And as it was only temporary, she’d be back before she knew it.

‘What do you need to know?’ Dawn said. It was her last day as Jane’s teaching assistant, but they were also best friends. So sometimes these supervisory meetings were a bit strained. Fortunately, she’d never put Jane in a position where she had to tell her off. But parting ways for a while was going to be hard, even if they would still be in touch.

‘Nothing. I don’t really need to do an exit interview. You’re not leaving. You’re coming back as soon as your maternity leave is over.’

That was the plan. ‘So what are we doing here?’ The deputy head was covering their class so they weren’t here on a jolly.

‘I’m sorry. I know you said you didn’t want a fuss or anything.’

‘But?’ Dawn should have known she wouldn’t be able to leave quietly. Just as long as the rest of the school staff weren’t hiding in the overflowing litter bin. Did they ever get a cleaner in here?

‘I couldn’t let you leave without doing something.’

‘I told you there was no need. The only thing I want you to do is remember I’m the best TA you’re ever going to have so don’t get attached to my temporary replacement.’

‘I know that’s what you said, but it doesn’t mean I agree. You do deserve something nice by way of a send-off.’

In a normal set of circumstances, it would be a baby shower with gifts to help over the first six months, but there was nothing usual about Dawn’s departure. ‘I’ll settle for the chance to follow my dream.’

‘Well, that, plus you’re helping David and Rebekah achieve theirs and I know the usual gifts don’t apply, so I sorted an unusual one.’

Jane went over to a hidden corner and left Dawn wondering how many people could hide in this room without being noticed. If anyone sprang out from behind a cushion she would box their ears, even if she was hindered by being full-term and at the point she would give birth any day.

‘It’s a bit big.’ Jane lugged over a wrapped present peeking out from a black sack. ‘I figure you won’t want to open it here. I’ll give you a hand with getting it home.’

‘What is it?’

‘You’ll have to wait and find out when you open it. I suggest you choose a moment when you’re missing us. Or more specifically me.’

‘I’m not going to get the chance to, am I?’ Jane was going to be walking Archie to and from school and they were planning to restart their regular weekly wine and pistachio night as soon as possible.

‘We’ll miss you and you’ll miss us. The school won’t be the same without you about. Who’s going to keep us all in check now?’

‘No one, judging by the mess in this staffroom.’

The bell for the end of school rang and it was like the whole of Owerdale Primary School let out a sigh of relief.

‘Come on. Let’s go find Archie.’

As always, ten-year-old Archie was waiting inside the classroom with his teacher until Dawn arrived. It was one thing she would miss about being here: the security of knowing her son was okay and being looked after. Not that that wouldn’t happen while she was away, but being on site helped if she was ever needed.

His teacher, Ms Clayton, smiled broadly at their arrival, Archie busy at his desk, drawing away. ‘Last day then, Dawn?’

‘Yes. Jane will be doing the school run until the summer to give me a chance to rest and recover.’ Dawn was due to give birth a few weeks ahead of the school breaking up for the summer holidays.

‘It’s such a wonderful thing you’re doing.’ Ms Clayton beamed at her like a halo had appeared above her head for the saintly act she was carrying out.