Kimberley Chambers - The Feud

Ronny had been thrilled to be asked. He’d hugged him, with tears in his eyes. ‘I’d be honoured, bruv, fucking honoured.’

Eddie wiped the palms of his hands on his smart grey suit. ‘Get someone to open that door, I’m sweating me cobs off in here,’ he ordered Ronny.

‘She’s arrived. They’re here,’ somebody shouted.

Eddie took a deep breath as Jessica walked towards him. Smiling, he squeezed her hand. ‘You look beautiful, really beautiful.’

The vows might have been short and sweet, but they were filled with emotion and spoken with meaning.

Eddie slipped the ring on Jessica’s finger and kissed her tenderly. ‘I love you, Mrs Mitchell,’ he whispered.

With little time to organise the big event, Eddie had chosen a restaurant in Canning Town for a slap-up meal, followed by a knees-up back at his local pub. He’d booked a disco and had told John, the guv’nor, to serve free drinks all night. He hadn’t invited too many people. Including Jessica’s family and friends, there were about fifty at the wedding and meal, and another fifty or so invited to the reception at the boozer.

‘I can’t believe my best mate’s married,’ Mary said, smiling.

‘You look so pretty, Jess,’ Linda said.

‘Beautiful,’ Ginny agreed.

‘Congratulations, darling,’ Joyce said, hugging her daughter.

‘I like Ed, he’s a top bloke, sis,’ Raymond said, kissing her.

Stanley felt his eyes water as he watched his daughter and Eddie gaze into one another’s eyes. It would all end in tears, he just knew it would.

His mother-in-law felt the same way. ‘I don’t like him. Surely our Joyce must realise they’re a family of villains? You’ve only got to look at them to see what they are.’

Stanley gave a defeated shrug. ‘You know what Joycie’s like, once she gets a bee in her bonnet. I never liked the flash bastard from day one, but as usual, my opinion counts for nothing in our house. I tried to tell Joycie, but she can’t see the wood for the trees.’

Noticing her father’s dismal expression, Jessica walked over and hugged him. ‘I know you’ve got your doubts, Dad, but trust me, I love Eddie and I know what I’m doing.’

Stanley took a handkerchief out of his pocket and dabbed his eyes. ‘I hope you’re right, darling, for your sake I do.’

Covered in confetti, Jessica and Eddie posed for numerous photographs.

‘Now all immediate family stand together,’ the photographer shouted.

As the camera flashed, both families smiled – well, apart from Ivy and Stan, that was. Stanley flinched as he spotted Harry Mitchell glance his way. Please God, don’t let him recognise me, he prayed.

Jessica felt nervous as she took her seat next to Eddie in the restaurant. Her own family were sitting at a different table and she’d have felt much more comfortable sitting with them.

She’d never met any of Ed’s family, apart from Ronny and Paulie, until now. ‘Where are Gary and Ricky? You said you’d bought them suits and they were coming.’

Eddie shook his head. ‘Sore subject. They were meant to be here, but my cunt of an ex-wife had one of her tantrums and took ’em away on holiday. You wait till she gets home, I’ll give her take my kids away without my permission.’

Not wanting to spoil his day, Eddie quickly changed the subject. ‘This is my Auntie Joan that I told you about, who brought me up as a nipper, and this is my Auntie Violet, my dad’s sister.’

‘I’m very pleased to meet you both,’ Jessica said shyly.

Auntie Joan patted the chair next to her. ‘You sit next to me, my darling, and Ed can sit at the top of the table. Oh, look at her, Vi, ain’t she pretty? Got the face of an angel, ain’t she?’

‘She’s an absolute princess,’ Violet replied.

As the two women showered her with compliments, Jessica felt her face redden. She wouldn’t have felt so nervous if she could have had a proper drink, but obviously, she didn’t want to make a show of herself in front of Eddie’s relations.

Harry Mitchell smiled at her. ‘You’ll get used to our nutty family in time, honest you will. Now, where’s your dad? I’ve been introduced to your mum, but I don’t even know which one your father is.’

As Harry Mitchell strolled towards him, Stanley felt the colour drain from his skin. Memories of the past came flooding back and all he could picture was Roger Dodds covered in blood with his eye hanging out. Unable to swallow the lump of fillet steak in his mouth, Stanley began to make choking noises.

‘For goodness’ sake, Stanley, why do you always have to show me up?’ Joyce yelled, as she punched him on the back.

As the meat flew out of his mouth and landed on Harry Mitchell’s lapel, Stan felt his bowels loosen.

Raymond burst out laughing and, luckily for Stan, Harry Mitchell was in a jovial mood. ‘Fucking hell, I’ve had a few bullets aimed at me in me time, but never a lump of meat,’ he joked.

Jessica was mortified. ‘Dad, this is Harry, Eddie’s father.’

‘Pleased to meet you,’ Stanley mumbled, shaking his hand.

There was no recognition on Harry’s face, and Stan breathed a sigh of relief.

‘Christ, you’re shivering. Shall I get them to turn the heating up?’ Harry asked kindly.

Stanley shook his head. ‘No, I’m fine thanks. I’ve got a bit of a chill, I think.’

Aware that her father was making a total penis of himself, Jessica quickly dragged Harry towards her brother. ‘And this is Raymond, my younger brother.’

Raymond stood up and shook Harry Mitchell’s hand. ‘Nice to meet you, sir,’ he said politely.

‘I’m sure we’ll all catch up again later in the pub,’ Harry said, bemused by his new in-laws. The brother was a proper kid with a handshake like a man’s. As for the father’s limp hand, the less said the better. ‘You can always tell a man’s soul by his handshake,’ his old mum used to tell him and Harry had learned over the years that she was spot on.

After everybody had finished their meals, champagne was poured freely all round. Harry Mitchell was the first to give a speech. He kept it short and sweet, but ended it by giving Jessica an envelope to open.

‘My wedding present to both of you,’ he said.

Jessica gasped as she looked inside. There were flight tickets and a stay in a five-star hotel in Italy. ‘It’s booked for next week. I’ve never flown before!’ she yelled gleefully.

As the best man, Ronny was the next to stand up. He spoke about Ed as a kid and ending it by saying, ‘Bev, my brother’s ex-wife, was as thick as two short planks. She was ugly, a monster, and I’m sure that everyone will agree that this time Ed’s got it right. Jessica is everything his first wife wasn’t and I’m sure they’ll be extremely happy together. Raise your glasses everybody. To Eddie and Jessica.’

Eddie locked eyes with his dad and Uncle Reg. All three shook their heads. Ronny had the brains and decorum of a fucking rat. Eddie quickly stood up, made a couple of jokes and glossed over his brother’s comments. He ended his speech by handing Jess yet another envelope.

‘You’ve made me so happy by becoming my wife, Jess. This is my present to you,’ he told her.

Jess couldn’t believe her eyes as she tore it open.

A few days ago they’d viewed a beautiful house not far from where her parents lived. Jess had fallen in love with it on sight. It was in a private road and was beautifully decorated.

‘We can’t afford it yet, Jess. Let’s get the wedding out of the way and we’ll find somewhere after we’re married,’ Eddie had told her.

Now she had the deeds and keys in her hand and could scarcely believe her luck. ‘I can’t believe it. Thank you, I love you so much,’ she said, as she threw her arms around Eddie’s neck.