Kimberley Chambers - The Feud

Joyce threw her husband a look of contempt. ‘Don’t you dare spoil our daughter’s happiness. If Eddie wants to support Jess, then good for her. I wish I hadn’t had to work when I was pregnant. Do you know how hard it was for me, dragging myself to that bloody office every day? I had no choice, we couldn’t survive on your measly wages. You leave our Jess alone and keep your idiotic opinions to yourself, Stanley. Unlike me, she’s found a rich man, a good ’un.’

About to answer his wife back, Stanley was stopped from doing so by Jessica’s reappearance. ‘Thanks, love,’ he said, as she handed him his cuppa.

Jessica sat down next to her mum. She had one more bombshell to drop and she knew her dad wasn’t going to be happy. ‘Oh, by the way, Eddie and I have decided to get married in a couple of weeks’ time. We’re not gonna bother with a church do, we’ve decided on a register office.’

As the horror of the situation hit Stanley, he spilt half of the contents of his favourite mug over his leg. ‘Bollocks!’ he yelled, as the hot tea scalded him.

‘Silly old goat,’ Joyce whispered.

Jessica felt sorry for her dad. She knew it had always been his dream to one day walk her down the aisle. ‘Are you OK, Dad?’ she asked kindly.

Stanley said nothing as he dabbed his trousers with his handkerchief. Whatever he said would make no difference, so what was the bloody point? Both his wife and daughter thought the sun shone out of Eddie Mitchell’s arse. With a sense of foreboding, Stanley said goodnight, left the room and trudged dejectedly up the stairs.

He was sure that the day would come when his wife and daughter would wish they had listened to him. Until that day came, Stanley had little choice other than to smile, be polite and keep schtum.

JOYCE GASPED IN admiration as Jessica walked through the door.

‘You look just like a model – so, so pretty. I am so proud of you, Jess, I really am.’

Not wanting her mother and father’s arguments spoiling her big day, Jessica had opted to get ready over the road. Her friends, Ginny and Linda, lived next door to one another. Both worked as hairdressers and they had kindly offered to do her hair and make-up for free.

Noticing Jessica’s hands shaking, her best friend, Mary, handed her a glass of wine. ‘Your hair looks fabulous at the back. Whose idea was it to put those beads in it?’

Jessica smiled. ‘It was Eddie’s, actually. We saw a girl wearing white beads in her hair in a pub last week and Eddie said they’d look great for my wedding day. He likes me to wear my hair up.’

Jessica only had one set of grandparents still alive. Her dad’s parents had both died in the last few years, but her mum’s parents had recently retired to Norfolk. Her nan smiled at her. ‘Beautiful dress, darling. Where did you get it from? Must have cost a fortune with that crochet and crystal trim.’

Jessica carefully sat down and took a sip of her wine. ‘A shop in Knightsbridge. Eddie sent me there; his friend owns the place and I was allowed to choose whatever I wanted. Ed told me not to worry about the price, he wouldn’t even let the man tell me how much it cost.’

Nanny Ivy pursed her lips. ‘Sounds too good to be true, this Eddie,’ she said curtly.

Joyce scowled at her mother. She saw very little of her parents, which suited Joyce just fine. They hadn’t seen eye to eye for years and Joyce would never forgive her mum for forcing her to marry Stanley.

‘No, he’s not too good to be true, mother. He’s a respectable gentleman, a lovely chap. In fact, he’s the total opposite of what you made me end up with.’

Ivy knew when to shut up. There was nothing whatsoever wrong with Stanley. Joyce had always had a high opinion of herself. Acted like Lady Dunabunk, she did, full of her own self-importance.

‘Where is everybody?’ Jessica asked.

Joyce looked at the clock and felt the first stirrings of annoyance. She’d been so wrapped up talking about the wedding, she’d forgotten Stanley had been due back ages ago.

‘Christ knows where your father’s got to. He was ready at ten o’clock this morning, had a bath and put his suit straight on, he did. Then he dragged your grandad and Raymond down the bookie’s, said they’d only be half-hour. If he’s in that pub, getting half-sozzled, I’ll bleedin’ well kill the bastard.’

Jessica felt her heart beating at double its usual pace. She was already nervous about the day ahead and the last thing she needed was her parents at one another’s throats. Please God, not today, she prayed silently.

Stanley Smith stood in the betting shop and watched in dismay as trap six came stone bollock last.

‘Stupid fucking mutt, wants putting down,’ he cursed, as he made the short walk back to his local. ‘Give us another three bitters, three whisky chasers, and a lager for Raymond,’ he told Anna, the barmaid.

Anna smiled. ‘You’re going for it today, Stanley. Who’s that older man you’re with? And why are yous all dressed up?’

Not in the mood for polite conversation, Stanley mumbled the words, ‘Father-in-law, going to a wedding,’ and walked away.

Stanley was dreading the day ahead of him. The thought of handing his beautiful daughter over to a bastard like Eddie Mitchell filled him with hatred and anger.

‘What’s the time, Stan? Hadn’t we better be getting back soon?’ asked Bill, his father-in-law.

‘Mum’ll have her broom out if you’re late,’ Raymond joked.

‘It’s OK, we’ve got time to drink these,’ Stan replied confidently.

Jock, Stan’s best mate, necked his whisky chaser and smiled. ‘Well, did you have any luck with that dog you had the tip on?’

Stanley shook his head. ‘I think the bastard mutt’s still running. My luck’s fucked at the moment, in every way you could think of.’

Seconds later, Stanley’s luck got even worse as he spotted an angry-looking Joyce stomping into the pub. ‘Shit, tell her I’ve already left,’ he said, as he threw himself under the table.

Knowing her husband’s cowardly behaviour of old, Joyce crouched down and immediately found him. ‘Stanley, get up from under that table and get your arse home this minute!’ she screamed.

Aware of the whole of the pub laughing at him, Stanley crawled out like a naughty schoolboy.

‘I’m sorry, Joycie. Me, Ray and Bill lost track of time. We were just gonna –’

Joyce lifted her umbrella and repeatedly whacked him on the backside. ‘Home, Stanley, now, and I mean now.’

With Joyce and her brolly on his tail, Stanley ran out of the pub, twice as fast as the mutt he’d lost his money on.

Eddie stood in Barking register office and glanced at his watch.

‘Don’t worry, she will be here,’ his brother Ronny assured him.

Eddie smiled. Paulie had been his best man at his first wedding to Bev, so he’d felt it only right to even things up by asking Ronny this time round.