Derek Landy - Bedlam

“And what exactly is going on here?” Skulduggery asked.

“We had a report of a break-in,” said Yonder. “We came to investigate.”

Valkyrie picked her way across the floor. “Did you find anyone?”

Yonder glared. “The suspects had fled before we arrived.”

“And the mess?”

“It was like this when we got here.”

“Who owns this shop?” Skulduggery asked, and their attention switched back to him.

“I don’t know,” said Yonder.

“Do you think perhaps it might be a mortal?”

Yonder shrugged.

“Because we’ve heard stories,” Valkyrie said, and they all looked at her. “You know all those pesky mortals from Dimension X?”

“The Leibniz Universe,” Skulduggery corrected.

She ignored him. “You know how they were all given the empty houses in the West District? That’s quite close to here, isn’t it? They’ve only been there for five or six months, but they’re already working hard to make a new life for themselves, away from Mevolent and all the nasty, nasty sorcerers from their home dimension. Well, we heard that there were some nasty sorcerers over here , too, and they were robbing these mortals.”

“Not robbery,” Skulduggery said. “Extortion.”

Valkyrie snapped her fingers. “That’s right. Extortion. Their little businesses would be targeted and threatened, and they’d have to pay these nasty sorcerers to not trash them.”

Yonder didn’t seem overly sympathetic. “That’s too bad,” he said. “Protection rackets are the bane of small business. Have these crimes been reported to the City Guard?”

“Well, that’s the problem,” Valkyrie said, passing Lush. “It seems the nasty sorcerers doing all this damage are City Guard officers. Like you guys.”

“That’s a serious accusation,” Lush said.

Valkyrie smiled at her. “I’m in a serious mood.”

Yonder’s radio barked to life for a moment. When it went quiet, he nodded. “OK, duty calls. You two have a good night.”

He went to walk out, but Skulduggery stood in his path.

Yonder narrowed his eyes. “You’re impeding a sergeant of the City Guard.”

“I’m just standing here.”

Yonder went to walk round him, but Skulduggery stepped into his path again.

“ Now I’m impeding you. Did I ever congratulate you, by the way? On your promotion? Congratulations. Sergeant Yonder, Officers Lush and Rattan – you’re all under arrest. Surrender your weapons and we won’t have to hurt you.”

There was a heartbeat of silence, and then Yonder laughed, and looked at his friends and they laughed, too, as if Valkyrie and Skulduggery couldn’t read the intent in their eyes. Yonder went for his gun and Lush went for hers and Valkyrie punched her in the throat and shoved her back. Rattan had his gun out and he was aiming at Skulduggery, but Skulduggery was throwing Yonder to the floor and Rattan couldn’t get a clear shot so he switched targets, swinging the gun round to Valkyrie. Valkyrie’s hand lit up and lightning streaked into his chest, blasting him backwards and filling the air with ozone.

Still gasping, Lush pulled her gun and Valkyrie grabbed her wrist with one hand and punched her in the face with the other. She ripped the gun away, tossing it into the shadows, and Lush snapped her hand out and a wall of air took Valkyrie off her feet.

She hit the ground and rolled, looked up in time to dodge a fireball. Energy crackled around her body. The fine hairs on her arms stood up. Lush threw another fireball and Valkyrie straightened, holding out her left hand, her magic becoming a shield that the fireball exploded against. Lush ran for her gun, but Valkyrie caught her in the side with a streak of lightning that spun her sideways and sent her down.

Valkyrie pulled her magic back in and quelled it before it scorched her clothes. That was getting to be a problem.

Yonder was lying on his belly, his hands cuffed behind him.

“You can’t do this!” he raged. “I’m an officer of the City Guard!”

“Not for long,” Skulduggery said.

Yonder rolled on to his side so he could glare at him. “No one will believe you! Commander Hoc knows you’ve had it in for me from the beginning! He’ll take my side!”

“He won’t have a choice,” Valkyrie said, walking over. “He’ll do what Supreme Mage Sorrows tells him to.”

Yonder snarled. “You’re so smug, aren’t you? You’re in with the Supreme Mage, so you get to strut around, doing whatever you want. Let me tell you, let me be the one to tell you – that time is coming to an end. You hear me? Things are going to change around here.”

Despite her worries, despite her anxiety, despite everything that had happened and everything she had done, Valkyrie looked down at Sergeant Yonder and found she still had the capacity to laugh at stupid people.

“Omen,” Miss Gnosis said, leaning forward, her elbows on her desk and her fingertips pressed together. “We need to talk about your future.”

Omen Darkly nodded. The office, filled with the morning sun, was nice and neat and smelled of some exotic spice that was not too pungent. Miss Gnosis had books everywhere. Her desk was packed full of stuff. She looked like she had a lot going on.

“Omen,” she said.

He looked up. “Yes?”

“Your future. How do you envision it?”

“I haven’t really thought about it too much.”

“I realise that,” Miss Gnosis said in that cool Scottish accent. She pushed a form towards him. “Do you know what this is?”

“It’s the SYA.”

“And what does SYA stand for?”

“Senior Years Agenda.”

“Very good.” Miss Gnosis sat back. “What age are you now, Omen?”

“Fifteen.”

“So you’ve got another two years of school after this one, and maybe two years after that before your Surge. Do you have any idea yet what discipline you want to specialise in?”

“Well, I … I mean, I suppose being an Elemental would be, you know …” He trailed off.

“Do you want to be an Elemental?” Miss Gnosis asked. “You don’t sound too enthused.”

“Yes, no, I mean, sure.”

“Is there anything else you’d rather be?”

Omen shrugged.

“Rack your brains, Omen. Is there any discipline other than Elemental magic that you would like to do for the rest of your life? Because that’s what we’re talking about here. The discipline you’re focused on when you have your Surge is the discipline you’re stuck with from then on.” She hesitated. “You do know how the Surge works?”

“Yes, miss.”

“Good, good.”

“Like, it’d be cool to be a Teleporter,” Omen said. “I’m always late for stuff and I get car sick on long journeys, so that would solve a lot of my problems.”

“Teleportation is one of the tricky ones,” Miss Gnosis replied. “You generally have to be born with the aptitude for it, like Never was.”

“Yeah, I know,” Omen said, a little glumly. “See, miss, the problem is I’m just not very good at most things.”

“Ah, Omen, don’t be so hard on yourself.”

“It’s true, though. I’m not. I’m no good at Energy Throwing or—”

“Proper names, please.”

“Sorry. I’m no good at Ergokinesis and I did want to be a Signum Linguist, but I just find it hard to understand all the letters.”

“Which is a problem when it comes to language,” Miss Gnosis said. “But you’ve still got time to decide. What I want you to do is come up with a list of seven disciplines – realistic disciplines – to take into your final two years of school. Then you can figure out which one you want to specialise in.”