Ginna Gray - A Man Apart

“Barring complications, yes.”

“Thank God for that.”

“Yes, well…I feel it’s only fair to warn you, given the condition of that leg…well…”

“What? What’re you trying to say, Doc?” Hank demanded.

“Just that…well…I think you should know that it’s unlikely he will ever be able to return to police work. At least, not on the streets.”

Matt turned his head on the pillow and gazed out the window at nothing in particular. The lady in the mist had come to him again last night.

The fanciful thought brought a hint of a smile to his stern mouth. Nevertheless, that was how he thought of the recurring dream that had plagued him all his life: a visitation by a phantom figure.

It was strange. For the past fifteen or twenty years he’d had the dream very infrequently—once or twice a year at the most—but since awaking in the hospital two weeks ago, it had been nightly. Not even the sleeping tablets the staff administered so faithfully had helped.

Absently, Matt fingered the jagged fragment of silver that hung from a chain around his neck, his thumb rubbing back and forth over the lines etched on either side. The pie-shaped wedge had been roughly cut from a silver medallion approximately two inches in diameter.

The instant Matt had regained consciousness he’d reached for the piece, and he’d panicked when he discovered it was no longer around his neck.

The medallion piece had been returned to him only because he had threatened to tear the place apart if it wasn’t. The hospital prohibited patients from wearing jewelry of any kind. Matt, however, had worn the medallion fragment since he was a small boy, never taking it off.

Matt’s fingers continued to rub the etched surface and jagged edges. Somehow, merely touching it seemed to soothe him. Particularly after a night of chasing after the lady in the mist.

He smiled again. The lady in the mist. He’d named the dream that years ago. It wasn’t scary or in any way threatening—just him and others he couldn’t identify, chasing through swirling mist after the shadowy figure of a woman, calling out to her, reaching for her as she backed away and disappeared—yet the experience always disturbed him. Invariably, he awoke with a start, his heart pounding. Last night had been no different. He wondered, as he had countless times, if he’d ever decipher the meaning behind the subconscious message.

Pushing the futile thought aside, Matt sighed and focused his attention elsewhere.

The impersonal atmosphere of the hospital made him feel adrift, removed from the world outside, a spectator with no part to play. Which, he supposed, was appropriate, since the life he had built for himself was most likely finished.

“Dammit, Matt, are you listening to me?”

John Werner stepped between the bed and the window, blocking Matt’s view of the street and giving him no option but to acknowledge him. The older man glared, his jaw thrust forward. “I’ve put up with your silent treatment long enough. If you think you can just clam up and pretend I’m not here, like you’ve been doing to me and everyone else for the past two weeks, think again. I won’t stand for it, you hear?”

John was a big bull of a man, standing six foot seven and weighing more than three hundred pounds. He had a broad, menacing face that looked as though it had been hewn from oak with a blunt ax and a voice that rumbled out like the wrath of God when he was angry. Most of the detectives on his squad cringed when he got on their cases.

Matt didn’t turn a hair.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“The hell you don’t. You’ve had a steady stream of visitors—family and friends, the guys on the force, the department psychologist, even your doctors—but you barely talk to any of them. You just turn away and tune them out. The few times you have bothered to speak was just to bite someone’s head off. Well, it won’t work with me. Like it or not, we’re going to talk about this.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Oh, no? How about the fact that you’ve refused all the offers of help you’ve received? Huh? How about that? Hank here has practically begged you to come stay with him and his wife while you recuperate. So have several others, but you’ve turned them all down flat.” He nodded toward Hank Pierson, who stood on the other side of the room watching his partner with a worried expression. “Isn’t that right, Hank?”

“Sure is. Look, old buddy, it’s no problem. Patty and I really want you to stay with us.”

“Patty’s got enough on her hands with three kids to look after.”

“Hey, one more won’t bother Patty. Really. In fact, she insists. You know she thinks of you as family. We all do.”

“Thanks all the same, but no.” Matt shook his head and looked away.

“If you don’t want to stay with Hank and Patty, then how about someone else?” John persisted. “Several of the other guys and their wives have offered to look after you.”

“The answer is still no. I don’t need anyone to look after me. Besides, I don’t want to impose on my friends.”

“All right. I think you’re wrong and full of stiff-necked pride, but I understand. Trust me, though, like it or not, you will need someone to look after you when you leave here. At least for a while. So why don’t you let the department pay for a nurse to stay with you?”

“Forget it. I don’t want some stranger in my house. Anyway, I prefer to be alone. As soon as I get those discharge papers tomorrow, I’m going home.”

“You’re in no condition to stay in that town house alone,” John roared. “Dammit, man, you’ve got a long recuperation ahead of you, and once your body is healed you’re going to be in for some grueling rehab work before you’ll be ready to return to duty.”

Matt snorted. “What makes you think I’ll ever be?”

“Because I know you, you bullheaded Irishman. You’re not a quitter, any more than your old man was. And you love police work too much to throw in the towel without a fight.”

Matt shrugged. “The doctor doesn’t share your confidence.”

“So what does he know? You’re going to have to work your tail off for weeks, maybe even months, to pass the reentry physical, but if anyone can do it, you can.”

Matt gave another scornful snort. “You have more faith in me than I do.”’

“Probably, but that will change. Now, the way I see it, you’ve got two choices. You can either hire a live-in nurse or you can spend the summer up at my fishing lodge on Lake Livingston.”

“Your fishing lodge?”

“Why not? It’s the perfect place to recuperate. The fresh air and peace and quiet of the country will be good for you. You can go for walks in the woods and fish off the pier at first. Later, when you’re stronger, you can go sailing or take the fishing boat out onto the lake.”

“Don’t you have tenants at the lodge?”

“Just one right now, but that’s no problem. It’s a big place. You’ll probably never run into each other. Anyway, you can use my quarters. There’s a private entrance off the side veranda.”

“I still don’t—”

“This isn’t a suggestion, Dolan, it’s an order.”

Matt bristled. “You can’t order me to do anything when I’m not on duty.”

Smiling benignly, the lieutenant crossed his arms over his chest and rocked back on his heels. “Oh, yeah? Don’t forget, you need my permission to even take the reentry physical. You spend the summer getting well at the lodge or you can forget about working the streets again. Got that, Dolan?”

“You’d do it, too, wouldn’t you?” Matt snarled. “You’d refuse to let me take the physical for street duty and stick me behind a desk.”