Christina Miller - Counterfeit Courtship

“Being an adult doesn’t mean you have to be gloomy all the time.”

“I’m not gloomy.”

Bless his heart. He didn’t begin to realize how much the war—and military school too—had changed him. “You used to be a lot of fun, but now everything is serious to you. The war’s over, Graham, and it’s time to stop fighting.”

A look of pain crossed his face, and although she used to know him better than anybody, she couldn’t understand that look or what had caused it. Was it her complaint about his seriousness? She couldn’t imagine that. Was he remembering the war, the suffering?

When he dropped his gaze to the floor as if unable to look at her, she knew. This powerful man, this war hero, had his mind on the past—their past—and she’d caused his pain with her careless words: You used to be fun. Her subconscious, underlying message spoke her truth: he wasn’t fun anymore.

But was that true? Considering how he’d spent the past eight years, was it fair of her to compare him to the carefree boy who’d proposed marriage to her?

She twisted the ring on her right hand. She’d give Mama’s best pearl if only she could take back those hurtful words. She wished she hadn’t said them, wished they weren’t true, wished she could somehow comfort him as she’d managed to comfort Betsy. She opened her mouth to say so, but he lifted one hand and shook his head.

“I can’t think about it tonight. I wasn’t this tired even after Chickamauga.” He strode to her side and took Betsy from her. “Let’s talk about it later. I’m going to put her in her crib.”

When he’d disappeared up the stairs, Ellie leashed Sugar and started for home, the mist of regret heavier in her mind than the settling fog.

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