Laura Ellen Anderson - Amelia Fang and the Memory Thief

CHAPTER 1

GOBLIN-SLIME

SUPERGLUE

On a misty Wednesday night after school,

young vampire Amelia Fang sat in her

bedroom with her pet pumpkin, Squashy,

surrounded by complete and utter mess.

‘Darkling,’ called Amelia’s mother, Countess Frivoleeta, from downstairs. ‘It’s time for your organ practice with Wooo. Remember your exam is coming up soon.’

‘Do I have to practise tonight?’ Amelia

replied, her heart sinking at the thought of

more organ practice – despite how ghoulishly

enthusiastic Wooo, their ghost butler, was.

‘I’m making Squashy a cute costume for my

birthnight party!’

Squashy squeaked and span on the spot

delightedly.

‘Isn’t it exciting, Squashy! Soon I’ll be eleven

moon-years old!’ beamed Amelia, flicking

through her Positively Pumpkin magazine.

‘And we get to celebrate in style at the Pumpkin

Patch! Golly Ghouls, I do love pumpkins.’

Amelia wanted to be a Pumpkinologist more

than anything in the whole world when she

grew up – she could imagine studying and

caring for pumpkins like Squashy forever!

Amelia also loved making things, and she

especially loved making things for Squashy.

Tonight her bedroom floor was covered in

black-and-orange material, goblin-slime

superglue and various cobwebbing tools.

The bedroom door creaked open, revealing

Countess Frivoleeta’s huge beehive hairdo

before the rest of her body. When she saw the

mess in Amelia’s room, she gasped.

‘Amelia, my dreadful little wart-picker, I

can’t see your bedroom floor!’

‘It’s creative mess,’ Amelia grinned. ‘Look,

I’m making some sunglasses for Squashy and

some tiny bow ties.’

The countess made a strange noise. ‘Amelia

Fang! It’s like you’re living in a goblin cave.

Wooo is waiting for you in the organ room, so

tidy this mess up and then go downstairs for

your practice. Quick-smart my dismal one!’

Amelia felt her cheeks flush. ‘But Mum, it’s

nearly my birthnight, and I’ve so much to

catch up on in Positively Pumpkin! Can’t I

skip organ practice just this week?’

‘Certainly not, darkling – you already

missed last week because you were at

3

pumpkin-patch digging. Organ practice is

important – pumpkin magazines are not.’

Amelia sighed. ‘Okay, Mum, I’ll be down in

a minute,’ she said, as the countess left the

room. Sometimes it felt like her mum just

didn’t understand.

‘Don’t worry Squashy, we’ll have your

costume ready, even if I have to stay up all

day to finish it.’

Squashy pa-doinged in excitement, but

landed on the tube of goblin-slime superglue

and a giant purple glob spurted all over

Amelia’s dress.

‘Oh no, be careful Squashy!’

shrieked Amelia, looking down

at the slimy patch.

But the little pumpkin leapt forward and landed on Amelia’s lap – slap-bang in the pile of goblin slime.

‘Uh-oh!’ cried Amelia. ‘You just sat in the glue . . .’

Squashy tried to pa-doing

out of her lap, but he

was firmly stuck.

Amelia looked around her bedroom in

search of some glitter – the only thing that

could dissolve goblin slime – but she couldn’t

see any.

‘We have to hurry, Squashy,’ urged Amelia.

‘Wooo is waiting for me and you’re stuck to

my lap . . . Argh!’

She tried her best to pull her dress off, but it

was rather difficult with a pumpkin stuck to

the front of it. Amelia found herself caught

half in and half out of the dress. Squashy had

begun to squeak in a panic and was swinging

from side to side, trying to free himself.

‘Whoa! Squashy, what are you doing?’ said

Amelia, trying to wriggle out of the tangled

garment. ‘Stop it, you’re making me lose

balance!’

But, determined to free himself, the little

pumpkin carried on swinging – causing

Amelia to stumble around the room like a

frenzied zombie.

‘OUCH!’ she cried out as she stomped on a small box full of buttons and lost her footing.

CRASH!

Amelia and Squashy went tumbling into the pumpkin-themed creations, sending the

whole lot flying across the room.

A few seconds later, her mum burst through

the door.

‘What the gravestones is going on?’ she

exclaimed, surveying the carnage.

‘Um . . . I can explain . . .’ said Amelia

sheepishly.

‘And what’s happened to your dress?’ her

mother said sternly.

Amelia looked down. Where Squashy had been swinging, there was a massive rip.

‘It was an accident, Mum, honest!’ said Amelia, scrambling to her feet. ‘I was just about to leave, and the glue spilt out and

Squashy got stuck and . . .’

‘I have had enough, Amelia!’ said the

countess, holding up a hand. She picked up a

copy of Positively Pumpkin. ‘You’ve always

got your head stuck in this silly magazine!

You’ve been neglecting your vampiress

etiquette studies and organ practice for too

long now.’

‘It’s not a silly magazine!’ cried Amelia,

snatching it away from her mum.

‘Do NOT take that tone with me,’ said the

countess. ‘One more outburst like that and

I’m cancelling your Positively Pumpkin

subscription!’

‘But, Mum, that’s not fair! It was an

accident, and you know how important

pumpkins and Squashy are to me!’ said

Amelia.

Countess Frivoleeta’s left eyeball twitched.

But she composed herself.

‘Wooo is waiting,’ the countess said through

gritted fangs. ‘Change your dress and then you

had better be downstairs in two minutes.’ She

swiftly left the room.

Amelia sighed and slumped on to the floor.

‘Oh, Squashy,’ she said sadly. ‘I don’t think

Mum knows me at all.’

CHAPTER 2

MY LIFE . . . IN

SONG

‘So, are you excited about your birthnight

party, Amelia?’ said Grimaldi Reaperton the

next night before school. ‘I heard your mum

and dad hired out the Pumpkin Patch for a

whole night!’

Amelia sat quietly, tickling Squashy’s

tummy. ‘I guess so,’ she said without feeling.

Amelia and her best friends Grimaldi,

Florence Spudwick and Prince Tangine La

Floofle the First sat under the Petrified-Tree-

That-Looked-Like-a-Unicorn . Florence was a

huge hairy yeti, an extremely loyal friend and

a great pit-digger who did NOT like being

called a beast by anybody. Tangine, on the other hand, was half-vampire, half-fairy and partial to a good face scrub.

‘A Pumpkin Patch birthnight party sounds super fun!’ said Tangine. ‘I know Pumpy will love it!’

Pumpy, Tangine’s own genetically modified pet pumpkin, tried to roll over, but fell asleep halfway through the roll.

‘Although, I’ve recently discovered Pumpy suffers from Chronic-Upside-Down-Sleep-Syndrome . . .’ said Tangine, giving Pumpy a nudge so that he was upright once

again.

The huge pumpkin flexed his six-pack

and PA-DOOFED once into Tangine’s

arms, causing the prince to fall backwards.

‘PRINCE DOWN!’ yelled Florence as

Tangine groaned.

Amelia tried to smile but couldn’t quite

manage it.

‘You seem sad, Amelia,’ said Grimaldi.

‘What’s up?’

‘Me and Mum had a bit of an argument,’

sighed Amelia. ‘I told her I didn’t want to play

the organ this week so that I could finish

Squashy’s costume – and read more Positively