Francois Keyser - Cold Feet

When I’m finished, they’ll both be crawling to me.

I look at the brochure I took from their booth and start to formulate my plan of attack. I boot up my laptop and am soon on Viola’s website looking for the information I need. I can’t find what I’m looking for so I try another angle. I go to the gallery and testimonials.

Bingo! I make notes of the information I am looking for and then close the site.

I pick up the phone and dial Viola’s office number.

The phone is answered promptly.

“Hi, this is Mrs. Anderson.”

“Yes, Mrs. Anderson. How can I help you? This is Jessica.”

The assistant. “We’re having a party soon for Mr. Anderson’s office and he asked me about the band that we had at the wedding. I thought I’d give you a call and find out if I could contact them to see if they’re available. Would it be possible to give me their number?”

“Sure, Mrs. Anderson. I’d be only too happy to. Hold on while I get the details.”

I wait a few moments and then Jessica comes on the line again. “Here you go, Mrs. Anderson.”

She gives me the contact name and number for Steve from the band called ‘Plastered’. I thank her and hang up.

I smile and mentally congratulate myself. It’s that easy.

When Steve answers the phone I arrange to meet him to discuss hiring the band for a party.

Steve is already waiting when I enter the coffee shop. He recognizes me from the clothes I told him I’d be wearing and waves to me. I cross to the booth and slide in opposite him. I feel his eyes appraise me as I sit down. I’ve worn a short skirt and a tight, white cotton blouse that accentuates my breasts. It’s unbuttoned just far enough to reveal a glimpse of my bra which is visible through the soft material of the blouse anyway. I shake Steve’s hand.

“How can I help you?” Steve asks.

“I have a confession, Steve,” I reply conspiratorially.

“What’s that?” Steve asks, intrigued.

“Well, when I said I need a band for a party, I wasn’t being totally honest. I’d like your band to play for all my parties unless my clients insist otherwise.”

“All your parties?” Steve frowns. “I don’t understand.”

“I’m a wedding planner, just like Viola who you work with regularly.”

Steve nods as the penny drops. “Well, you know we go back a long way. I mean I’d be happy to support you when you have a wedding if we don’t have a wedding booked with Viola.”

I smile and shake my head. “I thought you’d say that Steve but I have to say I’m looking for a reversal of that proposed arrangement. You play all my weddings and fit her in where you can. I’ll pay you one and a half times what she pays you per wedding.”

Steve looks at me and says nothing. I can tell his mind is working overtime and I can tell where it’s headed so I cut it off.

“This is a one-time deal. Right here, right now. There’s no going to Viola and bargaining with her. I’m not into horse-trading.”

“Well, what about if I call the band and discuss it with them?” Steve asks.

“Why would they care? A gig’s a gig. Doesn’t matter who you play for or where you play. Right?”

Steve sighs. He’s tempted but his loyalty is still to Viola. “When’s the first gig?”

‘Saturday.”

“ Saturday? That’s two days away! ”

“And?”

“We’re booked for a wedding with Viola. We can’t just drop her at such short notice. It’s not ethical.”

“Look,” I say hardening my tone. “You guys have a good name out there. It’s why I came to you first. But you’re not the only band. I’ll say this too, and I don’t mean to sound like I’m bragging but when it comes to wedding planners, I. Am. The. Best. So, you can decide if you’re going to be loyal to number two or three or whatever the hell Viola is, or you can come along with me. Success breeds success. You know that as well as I do.”

Steve ponders my words. I can tell he’s not happy. Then he shakes his head. “We can start next week. Not this weekend. I just can’t do that to Viola or her client.”

I look at Steve. He’s serious. “Well, I guess I’ll have to find another band then,” I say and begin to gather my things to leave.

“No deal?” Steve asks.

“I offered you a deal,” I say firmly.

“A deal’s only a deal where both parties are happy”

I pause. “And what wouldn’t make you happy about the deal? One weekend? One weekend when you could be earning one and a half times what you get now every weekend from now on ?”

“You know, I think this isn’t so much as our band being paid more as it is a personal issue between you and Viola. Am I right? Because if that’s the case, the band isn’t going to make a difference. If you don’t have what she offers she’s always going to be one ahead of you…”

“…and pray tell me, Steve, what does she have that I don’t have?”

“Aside from the band, she’s got a great assistant…”

“…got one,” I say.

“…rapport with clients…”

“Got it,” I add.

“…Wedding Whisperer…”

“A what?” I ask frowning.

Steve smiles. “See. You’re not close to what she offers.”

I ignore his remark. “What is a Wedding Whisperer?”

“A person who encourages the bride or groom to work through their fear of getting married at the last minute. You know, ‘cold feet’?” He makes inverted commas in the air with his fingers.

I sit back. “Oh, that! Who doesn’t have that?” I lie. “I just don’t call it that.”

“Well, I have to be going. It’s been a pleasure to meet you but I guess we won’t be doing business,” Steve says.

“Well, remember I did try to help.”

“Thank you for that,” Steve says as I stand. He stands too and we shake hands. I leave the coffee shop and he sits down again and takes out his cellphone. I know he’s going to try to horse trade anyway. Maybe I’ll let him do it. I’ll see how I feel later. Right now, I’m more interested in the ‘wedding whisperer’ concept that he mentioned to me.

I think of the cancellations I’ve had when the wedding has been about to kick off in church. Not many but it happens. It’s ingenious and I’m even more adamant to shut Viola’s business down than before.

VIOLA

“Steve, this is really difficult. I can’t just increase the band’s fee. You know this wedding was booked months ago. I calculated the fee based on what I was paying you then. Whoever is offering you this, obviously has the budget to pay what they’re offering.”

“I’ve spoken to the band,” Steve replies. “They want extra pay.”

“Look, let’s talk about extra pay for the wedding after this one and all future weddings. Just not this one. I’ve cut my profit a lot already just to get this wedding. It’s important to me. Having this wedding is good for my resume.”

“Well, it’s not good for our pockets,” Steve replies firmly.

“Steve, c’mon. Where is this coming from? We’ve always been able to negotiate. Why the big push now?”

“I only have a few hours and then the offer’s off the table.”

“Well, can I ask who it is that’s making this offer?”

“Does it matter? It’s not going to change anything,” Steve replies.

“Sure, but I’ll find out anyway.”

“Christine. Christine Jackson.”

I feel my anger rise instantly. The woman who I idolized and held as a role model until recently. My heart tells me this is deliberate. It’s not a coincidence. I almost swear but I bite my tongue.

“Vi?” Steve asks.

“Yes. Okay, look. I’ll pay you fifty percent more this weekend and from now on. Just don’t do this to me again, okay?”