Terry Neale - Jo-el

Made sense, I thought. My GPS was female.

“Eighty-seven percent, how’d you know that?” I said.

“I just added them up. I might have missed some that haven’t been turned on for a while, but it’s close enough.”

“Added them up!” I exclaimed, my voice rising with skepticism.

“Yes.”

I wondered whether to pursue this, recognizing that I had drifted away from my initial enquiry. “Tell me about the anti-gravity trick.”

“No trick,” she replied, matter-of-factly. “Just technology.”

“I see.” I guessed that would be the answer for a lot of things. I sat back a little and wiped my hand across my forehead, the perspiration dampened my palm. I removed my sweater.

“Do you want to see me?” she asked.

“I’m sorry?”

“Would you prefer it if I had form?”

For a moment I was confused, but then I stumbled out a reply. “I guess.” For some reason I was thinking of R2D2 from Star Wars.

“What would you like me to look like?”

“You chose.” I said, not really thinking.

Almost instantaneously the likeness of a young Bridgett Bardot appeared in front of me, dressed in a leather mini-skirt that was way too mini.

“Oh-my-god!” I exclaimed. My mouth gaped open, my eyes wide with amazement. I felt a swelling in my groin and my face reddened with embarrassment. I had to adjust myself.

She pouted, “you don’t like me?”

“No… no… I mean yes! Wow!” She smiled. “How did you do that?”

“Technology.”

I should have guessed.

“How did you know?”

“You had a black and white picture of her on your wall astride a motorcycle when you were a kid. I guessed you liked how she looked.” She smiled.

“How could you know that?”

Again she smiled, but didn’t say anything. Technology. But then I thought for a moment.

“That’s not technology. How could you possibly know about the picture?”

“I know everything.”

“Everything?”

“Well everything for the last two hundred and forty-eight million years.” She said, as if it was nothing.

“You’re kidding, right?”

“No, actually I’m not.”

“That’s incredible, it’s ridiculous, nuts, impossible.” I was dumbfounded and speechless for a while. I gazed at this gorgeous image in front of me and felt my heart race with excitement. My blood seemed to be surging through my body, I could feel a glow and a pulse over my entire being. My brow creased and I glanced out of the back slider. My house was not overlooked but if someone was to get into my backyard they would see everything.

She saw me look around. “I’ll keep an eye on the backyard.” She knew what I was thinking.

I was frightened for a minute. “Can you read my mind?”

She grinned, showing pearl white teeth. “No, I saw you checking the glass to the yard and guessed what you were thinking.”

“Oh, okay. But I think, maybe you should tone it down a bit.”

I think I confused her for a split second. That felt like a win. I smiled. The mini skirt suddenly disappeared and a black, demure pant-suit took its place. I breathed deeply, indicating my concurrence with the change.

“What are you?”

“What do you mean?” she replied.

“I assume you’re not real, but you look… well you know.”

“I’m a hologram within your understanding. Just a creation by the computer based on data and pictures that I reviewed.”

“Can I touch you?”

She smiled, as if she was truly a woman and I’d been rude. Then she reached out with her hand. I leant forward to touch her hand, but there was nothing there. My hand moved right through hers. She was a mirage. I was startled and withdrew my hand quickly.

“Weird.” I said, then became quiet. I stared at her, disbelieving. I felt frightened yet excited. What was happening here? Or was this really happening? Was I dreaming all of this? Too much Scotch maybe? But I hadn’t been drinking. Was I about to wake up and rejoin my world? I continued to stare.

“I need a name?” She said.

“What? Oh! yes, I guess that would be right.”

“Well?”

I stared at this goddess standing in front of me. I thought of my wife Mary and mentally said sorry to her. What for? she would have asked. Not Mary or Bridgette. “How about Sally?” I said.

“Bit boring, I was thinking more of Honaria or Scarlette, something down that line.”

“No!” I said, taking charge. “Sally. You are Sally.”

“What now?” I said.

“I think we should fit the eye-buds.”

“Should I be worried?”

“No, it’s quick and painless and then you’ll be able to talk to me anywhere without the disc monitor.” She indicated the business card thingy, still handing in mid-air.

“So why did I need it in the first place?”

“It will be useful, you’ll see.” But I didn’t.

“Okay. What do I do?”

“Pick up the little box on the table and inside you’ll see six small discs.” It was the jewelry box. I picked it up and pulled the top off. On two stalks were tiny, transparent round discs, almost invisible to my eyes. I looked up at my instructor. “Moisten your index finger and then use it to pick up one of the buds and then place it above one of your eyes, but below your eyebrow in the recess close to your nose.” Sally indicated what she wanted me to do. I did as she asked. “Now do the same with the other bud.” With both eye-buds in place I looked up at Sally, expectantly. “Good, now just wait I little while.”

Nothing happened, or nothing significant, though I could feel a slight warmth above each eye where I placed the buds.

“Okay, let’s try them out.”

“That’s it?”

“Yes, petty simple, eh! First let me explain what you have. These buds will project an image in front of your face like a heads-up display. No-one else will be able to see or read anything on the display. They are customized for your eyes only. The display will adapt automatically to the data that you call up. You can scroll down or up as you please. So ask a question, something that you might ask Google. The computer can differentiate between a real question and your musings.”

“Okay.” I said, amused by it all.

For a second I wasn’t sure what to ask. Then I said, “what’s the weather for the rest of the day?” Immediately a verbiage presented itself in front of me explaining briefly the weather forecast. Wow! That was neat. No more fiddling with my phone. “Who was Beethoven’s mother?” Maria Magdelana Keverich, replaced the weather forecast, with a mini hologram of a woman who I presumed was Maria. But something was strange. The woman was moving, she was walking in a clearing, the trees in the background were blowing in the wind, they were in color. I was sure that video didn’t exist in the eighteenth century. I looked up at Sally. “It’s a video, it can’t be her.” I said.

Sally smiled back at me. “It will take a little getting used to but as I have already pointed out I have access to everything that happened on earth for the last two hundred and forty-eight million years.”

I carefully studied the computer hologram of Bridgette Bardot in front of me then at the woman walking through the woods. I could feel my heart beating in my chest. I simply couldn’t accept what Sally had just said.

“Everything?” I coughed out.

“Everything.” She repeated.

I was speechless once again. “I don’t believe it! It simply isn’t possible. The storage capacity would have to be astronomical. And where’s the camera? Are you telling me…” my voice was argumentative… “that you have cameras on every person on earth, every person in the history of mankind. You followed them around with your own little film crew, bullshit?” I crossed my arms.