Lemony Snicket - The Bad Beginning

``From Justice Strauss's library,'' Klaus said. ``But that's not important. What's important is that I have found out your plan.''

``Is that so?'' Count Olaf said, his one eyebrow raising. ``And what is my plan, you little runt?''

Klaus ignored the insult and opened the book to where one of the scraps of paper was marking his place. `` ``The laws of marriage in this community are very simple,'' '' he read out loud.

`` ``The requirements are as follows: the presence of a judge, a statement of ``I do'' by both the bride and the groom, and the signing of an explanatory document in the bride's own hand.'' '' Klaus put down the book and pointed at Count Olaf. ``If my sister says ``I do'' and signs a piece of paper, while Justice Strauss is in the room, then she is legally married. This play you're putting on shouldn't be called The Marvelous Marriage . It should be called The Menacing Marriage . You're not going to marry Violet figuratively-you're going to marry her literally! This play won't be pretend; it will be real and legally binding.''

Count Olaf laughed a rough, hoarse laugh. ``Your sister isn't old enough to get married.''

``She can get married if she has the permission of her legal guardian, acting in loco parentis,'' Klaus said. ``I read that, too. You can't fool me.''

``Why in the world would I want to actually marry your sister?'' Count Olaf asked. ``It is true she is very pretty, but a man like myself can acquire any number of beautiful women.''

Klaus turned to a different section of Nuptial Law , `` ``A legal husband,'' '' he read out loud, `` ``has the right to control any money in the possession of his legal wife.'' '' Klaus gazed at Count Olaf in triumph. ``You're going to marry my sister to gain control of the Baudelaire fortune! Or at least, that's what you planned to do. But when I show this information to Mr. Poe, your play will not be performed, and you will go to jail!''

Count Olaf's eyes grew very shiny, but he continued to smirk at Klaus. This was surprising. Klaus had guessed that once he announced what he knew, this dreadful man would have been very angry, even violent. After all, he'd had a furious outburst just because he'd wanted roast beef instead of puttanesca sauce. Surely he'd be even more enraged to have his plan discovered. But Count Olaf just sat there as calmly as if they were discussing the weather.

``I guess you've found me out,'' Olaf said simply. ``I suppose you're right: I'll go to prison, and you and the other orphans will go free. Now, why don't you run up to your room and wake your sisters? I'm sure they'll want to know all about your grand victory over my evil ways.''

Klaus looked closely at Count Olaf, who was continuing to smile as if he had just told a clever joke. Why wasn't he threatening Klaus in anger, or tearing his hair out in frustration, or running to pack his clothes and escape? This wasn't happening at all the way Klaus had pictured it.

``Well, I will go tell my sisters,'' he said, and walked back into his bedroom. Violet was still dozing on the bed and Sunny was still hidden beneath the curtains. Klaus woke Violet up first.

``I stayed up all night reading,'' Klaus said breathlessly, as his sister opened her eyes, ``and I discovered what Count Olaf is up to. He plans to marry you for real, when you and Justice Strauss and everyone all think it's just a play, and once he's your husband he'll have control of our parents' money and he can dispose of us.''

``How can he marry me for real?'' Violet asked. ``It's only a play.''

``The only legal requirements of marriage in this community,'' Klaus explained, holding up Nuptial Law to show his sister where he'd learned the information, ``are your saying ``I do,'' and signing a document in your own hand in the presence of a judge-like Justice Strauss!''

``But surely I'm not old enough to get married,'' Violet said. ``I'm only fourteen.''

``Girls under the age of eighteen,'' Klaus said, flipping to another part of the book, ``can marry if they have the permission of their legal guardian. That's Count Olaf.''

``Oh no!'' Violet cried. ``What can we do?''

``We can show this to Mr. Poe,'' Klaus said, pointing to the book, ``and he will finally believe us that Count Olaf is up to no good. Quick, get dressed while I wake up Sunny, and we can be at the bank by the time it opens.''

Violet, who usually moved slowly in the mornings, nodded and immediately got out of bed and went to the cardboard box to find some proper clothing. Klaus walked over to the lump of curtains to wake up his younger sister.

``Sunny,'' he called out kindly, putting his hand on where he thought his sister's head was. ``Sunny.''

There was no answer. Klaus called out ``Sunny'' again, and pulled away the top fold of the curtains to wake up the youngest Baudelaire child. ``Sunny,'' he said, but then he stopped. For underneath the curtain was nothing but another curtain. He moved aside all the layers, but his little sister was nowhere to be found. ``Sunny!'' he yelled, looking around the room. Violet dropped the dress she was holding and began to help him search. They looked in every corner, under the bed, and even inside the cardboard box. But Sunny was gone.

``Where can she be?'' Violet asked worriedly. ``She's not the type to run off.''

``Where can she be indeed?'' said a voice behind them, and the two children turned around. Count Olaf was standing in the doorway, watching Violet and Klaus as they searched the room. His eyes were shining brighter than they ever had, and he was still smiling like he'd just uttered a joke.

``Yes,'' Count Olaf continued, ``it certainly is strange to find a child missing. And one so small, and helpless.''

``Where's Sunny?'' Violet cried. ``What have you done with her?''

Count Olaf continued to speak as if he had not heard Violet. ``But then again, one sees strange things every day. In fact, if you two orphans follow me out to the backyard, I think we will all see something rather unusual.''

The Baudelaire children didn't say anything, but followed Count Olaf through the house and out the back door. Violet looked around the small, scraggly yard, in which she had not been since she and Klaus had been forced to chop wood. The pile of logs they had made was still lying there untouched, as if Count Olaf had merely made them chop logs for his own amusement, rather than for any purpose. Violet shivered, still in her nightgown, but as she gazed here and there she saw nothing unusual.

``You're not looking in the right place,'' Count Olaf said. ``For children who read so much, you two are remarkably unintelligent.''

Violet looked over in the direction of Count Olaf, but could not meet his eyes. The eyes on his face, that is. She was staring at his feet, and could see the tattooed eye that had been watching the Baudelaire orphans since their troubles had begun. Then her eyes traveled up Count Olaf's lean, shabbily dressed body, and she saw that he was pointing up with one scrawny hand. She followed his gesture and found herself looking at the forbidden tower. It was made of dirty stone, with only one lone window, and just barely visible in the window was what looked like a birdcage.

``Oh no,'' Klaus said in a small, scared voice, and Violet looked again. It was a birdcage, dangling from the tower window like a flag in the wind, but inside the birdcage she could see a small and frightened Sunny. When Violet looked closely, she could see there was a large piece of tape across her sister's mouth, and ropes around her body. She was utterly trapped.

``Let her go!'' Violet said to Count Olaf. ``She has done nothing to you! She is an infant !''

``Well, now,'' Count Olaf said, sitting on a stump. ``If you really want me to let her go, I will. But surely even a stupid brat like you might realize that if I let her go-or, more accurately, if I ask my comrade to let her go-poor little Sunny might not survive the fall down to the ground. That's a thirty-foot tower, which is a very long way for a very little person to fall, even when she's inside a cage. But if you insist-''