George Bernard Shaw - Pygmalion and Three Other Plays

MRS. BAINES [taking the cheque] The longer I live the more proof I see that there is an Infinite Goodness that turns everything to the work of salvation sooner or later. Who would have thought that any good could have come out of war and drink? And yet their profits are brought today to the feet of salvation to do its blessed work. [She is affected to tears. ]

JENNY [running to MRS. BAINES and throwing her arms round her] Oh dear! how blessed, how glorious it all is!

CUSINS [in a convulsion of irony] Let us seize this unspeakable moment. Let us march to the great meeting at once. Excuse me just an instant. [He rushes into the shelter. JENNY takes her tambourine from the drum head.]

MRS. BAINES Mr. Under shaft : have you ever seen a thousand people fall on their knees with one impulse and pray? Come with us to the meeting. Barbara shall tell them that the Army is saved, and saved through you.

CUSINS [returning impetuously from the shelter with a, flag and a trombone, and coming between MRS. BAINES and UNDERSHAFT] You shall carry the flag down the first street, Mrs. Baines [he gives her the flag ]. Mr. Undershaft is a gifted trombonist: he shall intone an Olympian diapason to the West Ham Salvation March. [Aside to UNDERSHAFT, as he forces the trombone on him.] Blow, Machiavelli, blow.

UNDERSHAFT [aside to him, as he takes the trombone] The trumpet in Zion! [CUSINS rushes to the drum, which he takes up and puts on. UNDERSHAFT continues, aloud.] I will do my best. I could vamp a bass [65] Improvise a bass-line accompaniment. if I knew the tune.

CUSINS It is a wedding chorus from one of Donizetti’s operas; [66] Italian composer Gaetano Donizetti’s Lucia di Lammermoor (1835), based on Sir Walter Scott’s novel The Bride of Lammermoor (1819). but we have converted it. We convert everything to good here, including Bodger. You remember the chorus. “For thee immense rejoicing — immense giubilo — immenso giubilo.” [ With drum obbligato. ] Rum tum ti turn turn, turn turn ti ta —

BARBARA Dolly: you are breaking my heart.

CUSINS What is a broken heart more or less here? Dionysos Undershaft has descended. I am possessed.

MRS. BAINES Come, Barbara: I must have my dear Major to carry the flag with me.

JENNY Yes, yes, Major darling.

CUSINS (snatches the tambourine out of JENNY’s hand and mutely offers it to BARBARA]

BARBARA (coming forward a little as she puts the offer behind her with a shudder, whilst CUSINS recklessly tosses the tambourine back to JENNY and goes to the gate] I cant come.

JENNY Not come!

MRS. BAINES [with tears in her eyes] Barbara: do you think I am wrong to take the money?

BARBARA [impulsively going to her and kissing her] No, no: God help you, dear, you must: you are saving the Army. Go; and may you have a great meeting!

JENNY But arnt you coming?

BARBARA No. [She begins taking off the silver S brooch from her collar. ]

MRS. BAINES Barbara: what are you doing?

JENNY Why are you taking your badge off? You cant be going to leave us, Major.

BARBARA [quietly] Father: come here.

UNDERSHAFT [coming to her] My dear! [Seeing that she is going to pin the badge on his collar, he retreats to the penthouse in some alarm. ]

BARBARA [following him] Dont be frightened. [She pins the badge on and steps back towards the table, shewing him to the others.] There! It’s not much for £5000, is it?

MRS. BAINES Barbara: if you wont come and pray with us, promise me you will pray for us.

BARBARA I cant pray now. Perhaps I shall never pray again.

MRS. BAINES Barbara!

JENNY Major!

BARBARA [ almost delirious] I cant bear any more. Quick march!

CUSINS [calling to the procession in the street outside] Off we go. Play up, there! I m m e n s o g i u b i l o. [He gives the time with his drum; and the band strikes up the march, which rapidly becomes more distant as the procession moves briskly away. ] {27} 27 27 (p. 114) the band strikes up the march, which rapidly becomes more distant as the procession moves briskly away: Shaw controls the mood and emotion of this moment through stagecraft. Having gradually crowded the scene from the beginning of the act to the climax here, he now swiftly removes almost everyone from the stage to enact the sense of Barbara’s feeling of abandonment and loss. Everyone (save Peter Shirley) and everything fades away from her, including the sound of the Salvation Army band, leaving her bewildered and desolate.

MRS. BAINES I must go, dear. Youre overworked: you will be all right tomorrow. We’ll never lose you. Now Jenny: step out with the old flag. Blood and Fire! [She marches out through the gate with her, flag.]

JENNY Glory Hallelujah! [ Flourishing her tambourine and marching. ]

UNDERSHAFT [to CUSINS, as he marches out past him easing the slide of his trombone] “My ducats and my daughter”! {28} 28 28 (p. 114) “‘My ducats and my daughter’!”: Undershaft ironically quotes Shylock in Shakespeare’s The Merchant of Venice on the subject of losing both his daughter and the money she stole from him while eloping with Lorenzo (act 2, scene 8). At this moment, Undershaft has “lost” his daughter by deliberately alienating her from her vocation as a Salvation Army savior of souls; and he has lost his money by donating a large sum to the Salvation Army.

CUSINS [following him out] Money and gunpowder! BARBARA Drunkenness and Murder! My God: why hast thou forsaken me? [67] Barbara repeats Christ’s words of doubt just before He dies on the Cross (see the Bible, Matthew 27:46).

She sinks on the form with her face buried in her hands. The march passes away into silence. BILL WALKER steals across to her.

BILL [taunting] Wot prawce Selvytion nah?

SHIRLEY Dont you hit her when shes down.

BILL She it me wen aw wiz dahn. Waw shouldnt I git a bit o me own back?

BARBARA (raising her head] I didnt take y o u r money, Bill. [She crosses the yard to the gate and turns her back on the two men to hide her face from them. ]

BILL (sneering after her] Naow, it warnt enough for you. [ Turning to the drum, he misses the money.] Ellow! If you aint took it sum mun else az. Weres it gorn? Blame me if Jenny III didnt take it arter all!

RUMMY (screaming at him from the loft] You lie, you dirty blackguard ! Snobby Price pinched it off the drum wen e took ap iz cap. I was ap ere all the time an see im do it.

BILL Wot! Stowl maw money! Waw didnt you call thief on him, you silly old mucker you?

RUMMY To serve you aht for ittin me acrost the fice. It’s cost y‘pahnd, that az. [Raising a p?an of squalid triumph.] I done you. I’m even with you. I ve ad it aht o y — [BILL snatches up SHIRLEY’s mug and hurls it at her. She slams the loft door and vanishes. The mug smashes against the door and falls in fragments.) {29} 29 29 (p. 115) The mug smashes against the door and falls in fragments: Here Shaw creates in the action a realistic and striking analogue to the shattering of Barbara’s sense of self.

BILL [beginning to chuckle] Tell us, ole man, wot o‘clock this mornin was it wen im as they call Snobby Prawce was sived?

BARBARA [turning to him more composedly, and with unspoiled sweetness] About half past twelve, Bill. And he pinched your pound at a quarter to two. I know. Well, you cant afford to lose it. I’ll send it to you.

BILL [his voice and accent suddenly improving) Not if I was to starve for it. I aint to be bought.