Traudl Junge - Hitler's Last Secretary - A Firsthand Account of Life with Hitler [aka Until the Final Hour]

During the first days of our stay there was an atmosphere of suppressed nervousness everywhere. Hitler had come through his operation all right. Professor Eicken had removed a nodule from his vocal cords. I don’t even know if the operation took place in his bedroom or in a hospital, but anyway we didn’t see him for three days. Then he suddenly and quite unexpectedly appeared at the breakfast table one day. There had been an air-raid warning in the morning, and now we had all come out of the bunker and gathered for breakfast. Hitler had got up sooner than he meant to because of the air-raid warning, and didn’t know how to occupy his time until the conference. He looked for company, followed the sound of voices, and found us at breakfast. Of course several cigarettes were immediately stubbed out, and the windows were opened. Most of us hadn’t seen Hitler since his operation. The new attendant doctor who had joined us to replace Professor Brand was so self-conscious that he stumbled over his own chair-leg when he rose to greet Hitler, got entangled in the tablecloth and knocked his cup over. He went terribly red, looking embarrassed, and I felt really sorry for him when he was standing helplessly before his Führer at his full height of almost two metres. He had hardly come into social contact with Hitler at all before.

The Führer could only whisper. He had been told not to speak out loud for a week. After the conversation had gone on for a short time we all began speaking in whispers too, until Hitler pointed out that there was nothing the matter with his hearing, and we didn’t have to spare it. We burst out laughing, and Hitler laughed too. He also had to report a sad disappointment about Blondi’s condition: ‘She’s not in pup after all,’ he said. ‘She certainly got fatter and looked as if she’d soon be able to suckle a litter, but I think she just put on weight because she was getting more than usual to eat and didn’t have so much exercise. Tornow the dog-walker told me it was a phantom pregnancy, but I think she was just having us on!’ The Führer thought that her mate might have been undernourished, and next time there was a chance he was going to try again.

One by one people rose from the breakfast table. Schaub had to go to his position by the telephone. The Wehrmacht and SS adjutants had to prepare for the conference. Lorenz and Dr Dietrich were going to catch up with the latest press reports. Finally no one was left except Frentz the photographer, Frau Christian, me, and Dr Stumpfegger. [87] Ludwig Stumpfegger, b Munich 11 July 1910, d Berlin 2 May 1945 (suicide); 1930 begins studying medicine; 1933 joins the SS; 1935 joins the NSDAP; 1937 takes his doctoral degree; 1938–1944 makes his career in the SS and in medicine; 1944 appointed attendant doctor to Hitler at Führer headquarters in the Wolf’s Lair at Himmler’s suggestion; until 1 May 1945 in the Reich Chancellery in Berlin. We talked about Christmas. Would we be spending it in Berlin this year? Hitler shook his head. ‘I must go to the West. We shall probably spend Christmas in our “Eagle’s Eyrie” in the Taunus.’ I took the opportunity to ask if I could go on leave at Christmas this year.[…] Frau Christian could stay with Hitler, together with her husband.

I was given permission. Christmas wasn’t so far off now. In four weeks’ time it would be Christmas Eve. We four secretaries were using the time in Berlin to draw up lists of Hitler’s Christmas bonuses and pack up parcels. ‘Yes, one ought to spend Christmas with one’s family,’ whispered Hitler, sounding sad and wistful. ‘Eva writes to me too◦– urgent pleas to go to the Berghof this year. She says I must be in bad need of recuperation after the assassination attempt and my illness. But I know it’s mostly Gretl behind all this, wanting her Hermann with her.’ For Fegelein really had married Eva’s sister in the spring. [88] The wedding between Hermann Fegelein and Gretl Braun had in fact taken place only a few months earlier, on 3 June 1944. We had still been in Berchtesgaden, and the wedding was celebrated magnificently 2000 metres above sea level at the Kehlstein house. I myself wasn’t invited. And now Gretl was already expecting her first child in the spring [of 1945]. Surprisingly, handsome Hermann had succeeded in making friends with Eva, or perhaps it wasn’t so surprising when you think how lively, funny and amusing Fegelein could be. And Eva, who was young and loved life but had to live in such a prim and proper, retiring way was glad to have a brother-in-law with whom she could dance and joke to her heart’s content without losing prestige.

But Hitler remained firm. If he thought it would be irresponsible for him to go away, then Eva could not sway him, for all her charm and the great things she promised. And Hitler gave himself no peace. He had to go to the West. He meant to spend only two weeks in Berlin. But I had a wonderful opportunity of getting to Munich sooner than I had expected. Captain Baur was flying a plane from Berlin to Munich on 10 December. I asked if he would take me with him, and of course he said yes. So at least I didn’t have to worry about whether my little fox terrier would be all right while I was away. I could take her with me in the plane, whereas dogs in trains had been forbidden for several years.

I had a lot of cases full of presents and delicacies to give my family and a great many friends pleasure. I had searched the big warehouse full of Hitler’s birthday presents and found lots of useful things for my mother, who had been bombed out and was now living with my sister in a little village by the Ammersee outside Munich. They included underwear, crockery, clothes, etc., and I was also taking my husband’s entire wardrobe, quite forgetting that the plane was flying only to Munich, and then I would have to get myself and all my things by normal means to Breitbrunn, which didn’t even have a railway station. I had also forgotten that there was no shipping traffic on the lake in winter, so after a great deal of trouble I had to leave my cases in the nearest good-sized place on the railway line and set out on foot with my dog and my travelling bag. But the pleasure my early, unexpected arrival gave was enormous. At last we had a Christmas tree again, with our dear old decorations, the traditional Christmas baking, and a few little things saved from the old days.

Hitler was now at the Eagle’s Eyrie with his staff, ignoring the fact that even in these times of great distress a festival of love and reconciliation was being celebrated all over the country. I was rather uneasy in our cramped little kitchen-cum-living room, without a telephone or anything but a radio that broadcast the Munich station very indistinctly. And usually the broadcasts were interrupted by that quiet, uncanny ticking that was called ‘the Gauleiter’s groans’ and meant there were enemy aircraft nearby. Shortly before I had to get ready to return to headquarters, on 8 January 1945, Munich suffered one of its worst air raids. From our little village, about 40 kilometres outside the city, we saw the blood-red sky and the glaring white explosions of heavy bombs.

Next day all connections to Munich were cut off. The railway line was damaged, the phones weren’t working. But I had to be in Berlin on 10 January. My mother was worried and unhappy. She asked me to stay; she had a foreboding of something terrible that threatened us. But I couldn’t wait. I left my dog and my suitcase behind and went into Munich on a lorry. Making my way through the smoke, rubble and crowds of people I finally reached the Führer’s apartment on Prinzregentenplatz, picked up my ticket and travelled to Berlin that night. Once again my heart was very heavy as I saw bleak scenes of the horrors of war.