9.
31 July 1972
Agadir, Morocco
The next day was very special for me. I would see Mohammed again!
Although I didn’t want to cheat Mum, I needed to see him every day. So, my way was the best one. Nobody would suffer.
In the evening, when it was time for me to go down to the hall, I told Mum I’d find a few more books there. She agreed. She said, «A girl mustn’t be bored. Especially on holiday.» Marvellous words.
I was waiting for Mohammed, as the day before. (Although it was already evening, so I’d say «the evening before’).
«Hello,» he said when he came.
«Hello,» I answered.
«How’re you?»
«I’m fine, thanks for asking! What about you?»
«Me as well,» he said, smiling and taking my hand. «Where is the best place I want to stay? Between your arms!»
I laughed. Such nice compliments he was saying! I was happy. Really happy.
«My love! How will I live without you?» I said, with sadness in my eyes.
«My dear! But you can come here whenever you want!»
«Yes, that’s true! Although… I don’t have much money for the tickets here. Maybe…»
«Maybe what?»
«Maybe you would buy them, for me to come here?»
«But, my love, I don’t have that much money either. All I earn I spend on food. I’m sorry, my dear Janet!»
«Well, I don’t know… It seems like you just don’t want for me to come here…» I was confused. Very confused. I didn’t know how much money I would need to come here every weekend! And I did want to come to Mohammed every weekend. I only wanted to be with him, and that’s it.
«Mohammed, let’s be honest. I have no money to come to you, so it’s you that I want to buy the tickets for me.»
Suddenly, he said:
«Okay. If you don’t want to come here, it’s up to you. I’m not making you to.»
I was struck dumb. So, it meant he didn’t care? That just couldn’t be!!!
«Wait! I thought you’re a man!»
«My love,» he said, taking my hand, «I’m a man. But not a bank.»
He hesitated.
«But, my beautiful woman, how I want to hug you! I’ll be waiting for you, my queen! You draw me like a magnet!»
With these words, he hugged me.
Well, maybe, he didn’t have money. But he’d be waiting for me anyway! It was so nice!
«Okay,» I said. «I’ll come to you as soon as I save a little!»
«Don’t worry, my love! I’m always here for you!»
«But there’s a problem.»
«Which one, dear?»
«My Mum won’t let me come here to you.»
«But can you tell her I’m a good guy?»
«I’ve been telling her this for million-billion times. And I’ll go on with that. But she won’t listen to me.»
He let me out and said:
«Looking into your eyes and thinking, «You’re me girl, the best girl, and there aren’t any other girls in my life’.»
I calmed down.
«Yes, maybe you’re right. I’m really sorry for what I’ve just said.»
«Janet, you don’t have to apologise.»
«Indeed? So, no hard feelings?»
«No hard feelings,» he smiled.
High time I went home. It was already very late. Our conversation took us two hours! Quite a lot of time.
«So,» I said, «see you tomorrow! Mum’s waiting for me!»
«See you!» he smiled. «Good night, my dear!»
But he didn’t go at once. I stood up and was about to leave. But suddenly, he came up to me, took my arm and drew me close to himself. And then… then, he kissed me!
He had been kissing me for about one minute. It was the first kiss in my life. I wouldn’t forget it. Yes, I’d never ever forget it.
It seemed like I was going to have a sleepless night again, thinking about what’d just happened.
His lips were warm enough.
When he let me out, he said:
«I’m the king, and you’re my queen!»
What nice words!
«So, Janet, I must go now. My…» there, he stuttered, and then said, «my family’s waiting for me too. You know, my mother and my father. They both need care.»
«I understand you very well, Mohammed. So, good night!»
When I got up to my room, Mum said:
«Janet, what’s up with you? You look like having drunk some bad stuff in the bar!»
«No, Ma, just being exhausted.»
«I didn’t know one can be exhausted while on holiday!» she answered.
«Yes, they can,» I replied.
«Okay. I tired too. Good night, Janet! And don’t forget to lock the toilet door when you’re finished. You can’t sleep very well with that vent making noise!»
«Sure, Ma.»
When Mum fell asleep, I began thinking again.
First of all, why did he kiss me? Second, why didn’t he care about Mum’s being against our meetings? Well, maybe he just thought when, for example, we married one another, he wouldn’t see her? Maybe. Sometimes, they live away from parents as well.
And third. I absolutely had to buy the tickets to Morocco to come to him myself. No other way.
I needed to earn money somehow. Somewhere.
Oh, how I want to live and be served like a real king! I want to visit someone and have a hundred cakes and a thousand cups of tea! By, the way, it’s not food that matters, it’s the hosts’ warmth that has a real meaning.
I often wonder why only famous people – such as actors or singers – are welcomed heartily and treated like that. I wish I were one of them. But no! I must study – and now work too, for me to get here every weekend! Study, and study, and study. Work, and work, and work. What’s it all for..? So unfair it is! Those actors haven’t got any education, but still, they’re so rich and prosperous! They’re respected. And, of course, they’ll laugh me off if they just see me!
Well, I don’t understand one thing. It seems like I must even work for them. Work and live, live and work. How crazy!
10.
1 August 1972
Agadir, Morocco
My God! I had only a week left to stay here! It was awful! I wouldn’t see Mohammed any more after I left Agadir!
Stop, stop! No panic! I was going to find a way to earn money to come here again anyway!
Mum got tanned very well. She was sunbathing by the pool in the afternoon, when I was with her, and in the evening on the beach, when I was home (getting ready for meeting Mohammed in the hall).
This time, I put on another T-shirt. It suited me too. A nice one. I thought we were going to have a beautiful date.
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